On guard!
[laughing]
Oh my God.
What do you think of my equipment?
I just asked to borrow your video camera. What is all this?
Well, that's a three shift high-def camcorder
with a hyper-cardioid condenser microphone,
mounted on a carbon fiber tri-pod with a low-drag fluid head.
I also brought you juice and a bagel.
- I don't need you to-- - I'm going to plug this back in,
and when I come back, that hair will be fluffed.
Hurry!
[grunting]
There! Alright, now when Valerie gets here I need you guys--
[screaming]
- Stop it! - Your hair!
[screaming]
Bye, Mom!
Are we under arrest?
Are you gonna take us to juvie?
I don't wanna go to juvie!
They're gonna take us to juvie!
[sobbing]
Well, come on! I just had a nap,
drank two cans of Peppy Cola and I'm ready for action.
[grunting]
- I can't. - Why not?
Carly got mad at me for missing dinner with the Dorfmans,
and now I'm not allowed to fence anymore.
So you're just gonna let your little sister tell you what to do?
Oh come on, don't go get--
Well... should we?
Just so both of us can get it over with?
Hm...
- Just to get it over with. - Just to get it over with.
And you swear we both go right back to hating each other
- as soon as it's over? - Oh, totally.
- And we never tell anyone. - Never.
Well... lean.
[music playing]
This could be very fun to watch.
What's so important?
Maybe you would like to explain the contents of this baggy?
What is that?
Oh, you don't recognize this asparagus that I put on your dinner plate?
Mom, can we-- Don't shoot this!
Sorry, I can't hear you over this embarrassment.
Mom, please leave.
- After you finish your vegetables. - Oh my...
You better finish that with 'gosh'.
Dear gosh, please make her leave.
Dude, just finish your asparagus so we can get on with the show.
♪ When a big boy eats his vegetables ♪
Don't sing the song!
Everyone at school's saying you're a hero.
I don’t feel like a hero.
Well…
you are one...
to me.
I did it! I am the king of New York.
Are you sure you aren't cold?
In my country it's ten below in the dead of summer.
What was that?
We're under attack!
Calm down. It's just a snowball.
Oh.
You can threaten your double-fist face dancing all you want.
But Carly is still right.
Look, I know it's scary to put your feelings out there.
‘Cause you never know if the person you like is gonna like you back.
Everyone feels that way.
But you never know what might happen if you don’t…
Sorry.
It's cool.
I'm sorry, Mandy!
I thought he was my friend but...
Well, anyone who would call my adopted sister a weirdo is no friend of mine.
[blabbering]
I love you.
I love you too.
It's only 10:30.
Wanna breakup at midnight?
- That works. - OK.
Ah robot, you sure talk crazy.
Yes, I think my software may be buggy.
Let me check.
Uh-oh, I do have bugs!
Boop-boop-beep-boop!
You know, you don't have to take all your tech stuff home tonight.
Yeah, but I figured I might as well get a head start.
Tomorrow I promised Gibby I’d help him do some research on the
proper care and feeding of weasels, so.
I figured the sooner I get all this equipment outta here,
the sooner I could take down to…
[clears throat]
Launched floating... sushi...
- Sushi! - Sushi!
Launched flying-- Floating sushi bar...
[buzzer]
Well, hello Freddie Benson.
Hi, is Sam OK? Is she in the hospital?
- No, she's just in here. - Oh, thanks.
Sam? Sam, where are you?
Sam!
Oh, Sam's not here.
But didn't you just say she--
Well, aren't you a handsome boy full of questions.
Look, I'm really worried about my friend Sam--
Handsome?
Fifteen.
I, uh... I know nothing about any of this.
Could someone get my manager please?
I don't think these guys are even German.
Alright, well look, I'm not really supposed to say...
- Please! - Tell us!
Alright, alright. In my opinion...
- Uh-huh... - Say it.
I feel that Freddie, if he had to choose Carly or Sam,
would definitely pick...
[screaming]
If you wrote the show, who would Freddie be with now?
Freddie would have moved to Palo Alto.
You have it planned out, you've thought about this.
Yeah, he would've moved to Palo Alto,
and met this like super cute programmer.
That or he's still living with his mother.
He might still be with Mrs. Benson.
We don't know, you know that would actually.
That's a good ending.
- You know what? - That's a happy ending.
That's the only woman for him.
And his mom is happy too.
Yes, his mom is very happy with that decision,
and Freddie is tick free because of it.