- Hello,
my name is Marina,
and I'm here to pitch you my startup.
Hey, how are you?
Nice to meet you up.
The weather is amazing today, right?
You've heard two completely different intros
to a conversation.
The second one,
as you might've guessed,
is more American.
A lot of Americans started their meetings with small talk,
and this is pretty common for Western culture
but in a country where I come from,
we don't really do that,
we tend to be more straightforward,
today we're going to talk about the best topics
for small talk,
the best conversation starters
and please make sure you don't act like
the Russian Marina,
don't get straight into work
when you enter a meeting,
because this is not the way people normally
do it here in the US,
if you're interested,
continue watching.
Okay there is nothing bad
in being really straightforward
with what you want,
but people would normally expect you to
add something to the conversation like,
yesterday I was at Costco
and I was running after Emily,
my kid
and I was so into like following her everywhere,
I needed to know where the ribs were
and I just asked the guy,
excuse me,
do you know where the ribs are?
And he was like,
hey, stop.
How are you?
He wanted me to
actually have a conversation starter.
I was like,
oh how are you?
So it is friendly,
it is polite,
to have this conversation starter
instead of getting straight into business,
because this shows that you're actually
interested in building a connection with a person.
You don't view this relationship
as purely transactional.
So this is why people have these small talks.
These topics for small talk are not only important
if you're in a business meeting,
they're also important if you're just walking around
and you want to start a conversation with a person
and you just want to talk to them,
without doing business with them necessarily.
So the topics that we're going to cover today
are super important. please keep them in mind,
try to memorize them,
try to pick three or four topics
that you're most interested in
and you feel the most comfortable discussing.
And then depending on the situation,
you just going to use those small talk topics
and start a conversation.
Number one,
of course weather,
everybody chats about weather,
but please guys,
because this is so common,
the weather has to be extraordinary that day.
It has to be either really hot,
like today's Silicon Valley
or really cold,
like San Francisco always all most of the time,
or maybe it's just a beautiful sunny day
and it has been raining for the past two weeks,
so it has to be extraordinary.
In general,
observations are really good for small talk.
Whether it's an observation,
then a lot of Americans like
this is something I've only experienced in America.
You just walk down the street
and somebody looks at you and says,
oh my God!
I love you jacket,
where did you get it?
This is also small talk.
Or they'd be like,
oh my God I like your shoes.
Oh my God your baby's so cute.
This is something I hear all the time.
Oh my God your baby's so cute.
How old is she?
And this doesn't mean that you have to continue
for hours to talk to that person.
It's just establishing this friendly environment,
it's just establishing that people are open,
they're smiling at each other
and other small talk
I've recently had at Safeway's,
it's a local grocery store
with a woman,
because we're both not wearing masks,
and this is so new.
We're not allowed to not wear masks
in California,
and I hope that last
and she was like,
I'm so glad we're not wearing masks,
you can stand right next to me,
do you even want to hug me?
This was just a small talk..,
When we're at the cashier,
again just brightens your day.
If you just moved to new city,
plenty of topics that you can discuss.
When I just moved to Dresden
Deutschland,
If you're from Germany
watching comment down below,
but this is so different from America,
so different from Russia.
It was my first weekend in Dresden
I don't know Dresden is very German right?
So it was my first weekend
and I'm walking down the street
and everything is empty.
All the grocery stores have closed,
I have no food.
I'm so kind of sad
and almost depressed
because I'm alone in this new city.
And then I see my friend and I'm like,
guys what do you do on weekends?
This is a great topic for a conversation
and he went on about reading books
and doing laundry.
And I'm like,
ah I just came,
I don't have any books with me,
I don't have any laundry yet,
but this is the way we became friends
because he offered me
to cook some dinner for me,
cause he had food at home,
I didn't have anything.
This is a conversation starter.
You can ask about hidden gems in the city.
You can ask about top three places to visit
or the best restaurant for sushi.
With small talks,
it's not just about talking to a person.
It's also making them understand that you understand them
and connecting on a different level.
So,
I would be really really attentive
to whatever you're talking about
and I would never skip a chance
of a small talk.
At LinguaTrip,
a company that I started,
we have an amazing course,
for everyone who wants to sound
and live like a native speaker.
So it's not just about accent,
not just about speaking like a native speaker.
It's about cultural tips.
How do you behave as an American?
Which words you use,
how you start a conversation,
how you react to something,
amazing course,
by one of our amazing teachers Venya.
Who moved to the US,
who was an immigrant,
but you can't really tell he's an immigrant
because he's just so good at explaining the acts.
And he's just so good at explaining how to behave
like an American.
The link will be down below.
You're going to have a special discount
because you watch this video.
I recommend taking this course 100%
because Vienna is a person I would go to every single day
when I have questions about like,
oh can you translate this for me?
What did he mean?
Or how do I react to the situation?
He would always give me the best advice.
So the link is down below,
highly highly highly recommended.
Work is another topic for a small talk.
And it is very common in Silicon Valley
and I guess everywhere.
when you're at a party
and you're meeting people,
you want to know what they do professionally.
And this is the way you ask it.
What do you do professionally?
Or what do you do in general?
Who do you work for?
This might be a little weird,
but what do you do professionally?
Or what do you do?
is a great question.
And this is again a conversation started
and somebody says,
oh I'm a YouTuber.
And I'm like yeah I'm a YouTube as well.
I'm a blogger.
I talk about English.
So talking about work,
but it doesn't have to be too deep into detail
because if it's a party,
if it's an informal event,
people don't really want to go into details
about their work,
unless,
it's a networking party,
where people would want to pitch their startup
or what they're doing
Entertainment.
When Dima and I go out
and we meet new people,
we always always ask them,
what are they watching right now?
in terms of TV shows,
I've just finished watching the Manifest
on Netflix.
And I honestly think it's one of the best TV shows out there
because it's about an airplane that disappeared
and then came back.
This is just a recommendation for you guys,
Manifest,
but I would always always ask people
why they're watching right now.
And this is how I get recommendation's
for movies and TV shows
and also ask them
what books they're reading right now?
And this might be a little out of the blue question.
Like your approach a person,
you start a conversation
and they're like,
oh by the way can you recommend a TV show?
But then I tell them,
you know,
I ask this question,
almost everybody,
because I always need fresh ideas,
because otherwise,
whenever we sit down with Dima
in the evening
and we decided to watch a movie,
we spend half an hour looking for the right movie
and then we just end up falling asleep.
And that's it.
This is why I referred to have a note
with different recommendation's from people I like
News.
Another great topic to discuss,
but,
you need to know where you are.
Like if you're in Silicon valley in 2021,
you want to discuss creator economy,
NFTSs,
investing in AI.
I don't know people moving out of SF,
people moving to Austin,
or you want to discuss the latest tweet by Li Jin's
or somebody else.
Like you have to know where you're talking about
and if you are traveling somewhere,
or you know you're going to be at that party,
try to follow people who are going to be at that party
and see what they're tweeting about
what they're talking about.
I always always,
If I have a conversation with someone,
plan an interview,
plan to reach out to someone,
I would always read their Twitter
or any other social media
they're active on,
in order to know what kind of news
I want to discuss with them.
Travel.
Another great topic for the COVID era.
What was the last time you traveled?
Or if somebody traveled recently,
they would be like,
oh my God I couldn't believe I was in a trip,
great topic.
Or just saying,
you know,
I haven't traveled for almost a years.
And people were like,
oh yeah me too.
Just bruise that you're relatable.
And in terms of timing,
if I have half an hour call with someone,
we'll probably spend the first five or seven minutes
talking about random stuff,
setting up this connection.
And then the rest of the meeting,
like 20-25 minutes,
we would go into actual stuff.
Hobbies,
free time.
Let me just give you some phrases.
A lot of people here ask,
what do you do when you're not working?
Or are there any hobbies you're thinking of starting up
Food.
This is a great topic
if you are meeting someone at a restaurant,
my favorite question would be,
cause I'm a fan of sushi.
And if we go to a sushi place with someone,
I would say name top three restaurants
where you've eaten sushi.
Or I would just ask them in general,
what are your top three restaurants?
Again great for recommendations.
People love to share their experiences,
especially if they travel a lot and they like food
and another great thing to do.
I have a note where I just list different restaurants.
People love all over the world.
It doesn't mean necessarily that
I'm planning my trip to,
I don't know Guatemala anytime soon,
but I'm just writing things down.
You never know where life brings you.
And then you're in Guatemala
and you have a list of restaurants,
Life Story.
People love sharing stories about themselves.
How did you get into Silicon valley?
Like a lot of people are immigrants here.
Where were you born?
How did you end up living in San Francisco?
How did you end up working for this company?
Tell me your story.
And the last but not the least,
family.
This is something I would be careful about,
especially asking about relationships
and having kids.
Because if people have problems there
that may be a really sensitive topic
and I don't want you to hurt them.
So don't ask,
do you have kids?
or are you planning to have kids?
If they start a conversation about their kids,
then ask them,
How old they are,
what are their names?
But if they don't mention kids,
then don't ask about them.
And if they don't mention a spouse themselves,
don't ask them about getting married
or dating.
A person that you're talking to
should be comfortable about this topic.
And you will understand if they're comfortable.
If they started the conversation themselves.
If they mention the spouse,
if they mention their children.
And my last tip,
my worst problem when meeting new people,
I forget their names right away.
So I just reminded myself that whenever
somebody tells me their name,
like hi what's your name?
My name is Emma.
I say oh Emma,
how did you end up living in San Francisco?
So I would call them by name
in the first question
that I ask.
And I try to say goodbye Emma,
at the end of the conversation,
cause otherwise it just forget names.
And it's awful really,
because when you're meeting a person
for the second time,
you won't really ask for the name
because you met before.
And then sometimes I end up seeing people
for the fifth time
and i still don't remember their names,
which is not the best situation.
So I hope that the topics
that I came up with in this video were useful.
I hope my stories
or something that entertained you.
If you're not yet subscribe to this channel
hit the red button down below,
share this video
with anyone who's moving to a foreign country
or who wants to work in the US UK,
because this is super important.
It's a number one cultural thing
that you have to learn because,
you know you're going to come out here
and you want to be natural.
Thank you guys so much.
See you soon.
bye-bye.