Hi! I’m Nadine Piat from Healthy You Healthy Love.
I’m a coach for smart, savvy women looking for love.
And, in today’s video, I’m going to be talking about- what are the things that really
contribute to relationships failing and the solution to this?
And it’s probably not what you expect, so hang in there with me.
Now before we continue with the topic, please be sure to subscribe to this channel and click
that bell button to get notified of my next video.
If you like the video, give it a thumbs up.
Please also share this video with a friend who’s in need of some support in this kind of way.
And you’ll see as the video continues.
Okay! So, let’s get into it.
What is happening in a relationship that can really break it down and what is that we can
do to actually make our relationship stronger?
What is this one thing that people are neglecting to do that is actually creating more problems
in their relationship?
A friend of mine, the other day, was sharing with me that a sibling of theirs was having
some trouble in their relationship.
And there were some contention going on between the husband and wife.
And I said to my friend, have you said anything to them?
Have you shared your perspective?
And the friend of mine said to me that he didn’t think it was his place to do so.
And I agree with that.
I think there are some situations that there is a time and place to share and I think in
this situation perhaps the timing wasn’t quite right.
But overall, when it comes to families, when it comes to relationships, when it comes to
friends, there are some friends that will give you their opinion without asking, and
there are many times that people don’t actually make the effort, don’t actually say anything.
Now, I once learnt from a mentor of mine that never give someone opinion unless they ask for it.
It’s none of your business, unless someone actually is seeking your support then it’s
not in your place to share your perspective.
And, I do agree with this.
And yet what many couples don’t do, and this is what this whole video is about, is
actually ask for some support.
Actually seek external expertise help them resolve their relationship troubles.
Because a lot of people, men in particular but women also, they tend to sort of go in
within a relationship or within themselves and hope that at some stage of the relationship
will just get better.
Most of this doesn’t happen unless there is something that takes place for the relationship
to heal, for differences to be resolved.
So, this is my encouragement for you today, if you know that you tend to be quite close,
quite insular when it comes to your relationships, or even your dating life then, get some support,
seek some expertise.
And it doesn’t have to be a coach like me. It can be a trusted friend or family member.
It could be someone that you know has gone through a lot in their lives and succeeded,
has gone through a lot of personal challenges perhaps and worked out ways to find really
beautiful empowered values base on a base solution.
When we look at the hunter and gatherer time of living and still in this day and age often
says it takes a village to rear a child.
Two parents raising their children, is sometimes a very hard thing.
What can really be very helpful and have a positive influence on the rearing of those
children is actually having family members support you with parenting.
It can actually give the children a different perspective, allow the children to have relationships
with other people outside of the immediate relationship with the parents.
Because sometimes one child doesn’t particularly get long as well with both of the parents
for whatever reason.
There’s some conflict and someone from the external can actually allow that child to
have a different perspective, a different relationship, a sense of connection that they
may not actually be able to experience with their own family.
And this is the same for a relationship.
The truth is that we're always learning and growing.
Some of us are more active at it than others.
And some people are very closed off to learning and growing.
If you want to be in a healthy relationship, if you want to have a joyful life and feel
at peace with your self from the inside out and have peaceful connected relationships
with other people, there is no other way to do that unless you’re willing to learn and grow.
And so, we can’t learn and grow when we’re not open to learning.
Sometimes we are incapable of learning and seeing what we’re doing in a relationship,
seeing how we’re treating ourselves within a relationship.
Or whether we're, the way that we go around dating as a single person.
It’s very effective to have someone externally looking in because we’re all very much subjectively
driven.
We’re all driven a lot by our past, our upbringing that doesn’t necessarily create the results
that we want in our lives.
So, there comes a time when we need to know our limitations, futher our highest good for
us to create the life that we want, the relationships that we want.
It’s the same for career, it’s very hard to change career and change path without a
mentor without discussing the path with someone who has already done it, without learning
a new skill.
And so, the same is applied to a relationship.
You know, you can’t learn to be a better communicator without learning the skills to
be a better communicator.
You can’t see your weaknesses in a relationship, when you’re so focused on your ego and being
right.
All this stuff really impacts the relationship.
So, my advice in this video is to really know what you’re capable of, know when you’re
struggling and be open to the magic that can be created when we seek support externally.
So how do we know who’s the right person to support us? So I've mentioned before, you’ve
got to seek people that have done the work on themselves, who may have the kind of relationship
that you want, someone who has a lot of experience in the dating and relationship world.
A lot of relationship problems come down to our understanding of our worth and value.
The reason why a lot of people pursue unhealthy relationships or act out in an unhealthy ineffective
way in a relationship it comes down to our own internal hurts, bruising of our ego, lack
of worth.
So, if you can find someone that can really help you to build your worth, your esteem,
your relationship skills, then you’re really on a beautiful path to having that united,
connected, passionate, long-lasting relationship.
A really powerful way to help you with this is my program Never Lose Him.
I created this program for this right very reason.
I was in a relationship that wasn’t healthy for me, that I was stuck in.
And when I finally removed myself from that relationship for me to get to that stage of
walking away and being able to be in a healthy relationship with someone else, I had to do
this work, really understand my worth and value.
And so, Never Lose Him is largely a personal development-based program that links into
all aspects of dating in a relationship, but it always comes back to the self.
And it is such a beautiful and powerful program, if I do so myself and yet it is the foundations
to your life not only to love.
Because the way we, or you understand yourself is the foundation to everything.
So, if you want to have a beautiful relationship that is the great place to start.
And also start looking at mentoring, coaching and reaching out to people.
Not to have shame, a lot of people have shame and embarrassment around relationships failing,
things not working out, or have embarrassment around their difficulties and they also have
embarrassment and shame around the way that they’ve acted and behaved in a relationship.
And this doesn’t serve you to heal, this doesn’t serve you to create the relationship
you want.
We have to let go shame, let go of embarrassment because that is largely based on ego and your
worth.
You are worthy of a beautiful relationship, you’re worthy of being forgiven, other people
are worthy of being forgiven.
And I don’t want you to be in a relationship that is unhealthy and I also don’t want
you to give up in a relationship if you haven’t done the work on yourself and if you haven't
also done the work within the relationship.
If you are dating a man who is genuinely a solid human being, a man of honor who is genuinely
kind and you know there’s some dynamics in a relationship that is creating unnecessary
friction, pain- disconnect, then work on it.
You can transform this relationship starting today.
So check out Never Lose Him, the link is right below in the description.
I do, do group coaching from time to time.
Please go to my website at healthyyouhealthylove.com the link is below.
Send us an email at the support@healthyyouhealthylove.com email address and let us know if you’re
interested and we can find out a little bit more information about you, we can share more
with you because we can support you on this journey.
Please reach out to people that you trust, that you know have good relating skills, that
have a good sense of themselves to help support you.
But don’t go to someone who really lives a chaotic, dramatic life, someone who is
out of integrity. They're not generally the people to support you.
So, sending you lots of love, have the courage to pull apart your own fears and insecurities
so you can have a beautiful loving relationship.
Once again please subscribe, give this video the thumbs up.
Please share it with a friend.
I’m becoming more and more active on Instagram at the moment. That’s my new place.
I've not been a massive social media person.
So please do share this video as a story with your friends, tag or even text someone.
But if you do go to Instagram please tag me there @nadinepiat and I look forward
to seeing you there so I can see what you’re up to.
Once again, I want to find out about you, who you are, what your needs are, so I
can support you in the best way possible.
So please do comment below.
It’s been an honour to have you here with me, I value you completely and see you again
at my next video.