[Jack:] And that was "Rock You Like a Hurricane" on WLOL radio!
We're gonna take a short break but we'll be right back with hits from the 50s, 70s, and today!
*whistling jingle bells*
(door creaking)
[Ryan:] Hey, Jack.
WAAAAAAAAAH
[Jack:] And we've got two more DEEP CUTS before I leave you for the evening.
But don't worry, I'll be back at 5am for all your favorites from the 20s, 17s, and today.
Next up, Ham Radio.
[Ryan:] Yeah - and I couldn't even finish my pee!
I had to stop the stream by kicking it like a teeny tiny brown garden hose!
Kurt... it hurt so bad.
[Kurt:] Well, I'm glad it hurt, 'cuz that advice you gave me,
to wave at him, sucked!
He tried to shoot me with his weird laser thing, too!
[Cook:] Oh hey, ladies. Hate to break up your little tea party here.
But uh, I need you to make a decision.
Creamed corn, warm ambrosia salad,
or this crazy green shit Carlos made.
I don't give a rat's ass what you pick, I just need a decision.
[Kurt:] Uh... the green shit, I guess.
[Ryan:] Yeah yeah yeah, me too! I want double!
I just don't know how much more I can take of this bullying.
It's exactly like junior high, and high school, and elementary school.
And that dance class I took.
[Kurt:] Dance class? [Ryan:] Huh-uh, huh?
[Cook:] You guys afraid of a little robot?
Is that what I'm hearin'?
Oh my - you would not believe the type of bully I had to deal with.
[Cook:] I remember a lot of names. [Kurt:] You do?
[Cook:] There was - there was a kid on my Little League team,
who would come to Little League practice, and he...
was a lot more physically mature than the rest of us.
[Ryan:] Ooooh. [Cook:] And that- and, Hawaiian kids in general mature
uh, like, more quickly than like caucasian kids,
and just like well-built, y'know,
[Ryan:] Yeah. [Cook:] So, it makes getting picked on,
if you are getting picked on,
a real treat.
(laughing)
Cuz they can really put a lot of muscle behind it.
[Kurt:] It's like your dad pickin' on you at that point. [Cook:] Yeah it is, it really is.
(laughing) [Cook:] But this kid,
he was local, he wore wife-beaters,
and filled 'em out in like, the 8th grade,
he was in 8th grade when he should've been pry in the tenth grade,
[Kurt:] Yeah.
[Cook:] And he wasn't a baseball player, but
he just, like, decided he wanted to do it,
and nobody could, like, tell him otherwise, including the coach.
[Ryan:] Was he any good at it?
[Cook:] No. But this kid,
you'd pull up on your bike, and you'd hear from hundreds of yards away,
the crack of a bullwhip,
and you'd be like "Fuuuuuuck," [Kurt:] Oooh, he was a-
[Cook:] John brought his bullwhip today! [Kurt:] Oh, he actually brought a bullwhip?
[Cook:] He like, literally brought a bullwhip,
and like, knew how to use it. [Kurt:] To baseball practice?
[Cook:] Oh yeah. And you could hear this, the sound, it's a very distinctive sound-
[Ryan:] Wha-pissh!
(laughing) [Cook:] And it's like,
the sound of just like, ass-whooping, right.
Like, just, to the extreme.
[Kurt:] And it's the sound of an assHOLE, because - [Cook:] Oh yeah, yeah -
[Kurt:] you have to be an asshole, [Cook:] What kind of dickhead
[Kurt:] yeah! [Cook:] like, literally brings a bullwhip
to like a sporting practice. (laughing)
[Kurt:] Exactly! [Cook:] Fuuuuck! Y'know like,
and he would just sit out in the middle of the infield and just crack his whip which was like,
fourteen feet long, so nobody could go to their position.
[Kurt:] Right. (laughing)
He's got a 28 foot diameter that he's ruling out in the middle of the field.
*whistling jingle bells* (Door creaks open)
[Ryan:] Uuuh, hi, Jack.
Kurt! The eagle is pissing! The eagle is pissing!
(two of them yelling)
*gasps*
[Ryan:] Run, Kurt! Run!
(screaming)
[Kurt:] You... you said that would work!
I have no idea why I listen to you. Ever.
[Ryan:] What? The plan was like totally stupid-proof!
I mean, a freaking bullwhip is badass, come on!
[Kurt:] Well... At least I looked pretty sweet, right?
[Ryan:] Ah. Yeah, dude.
Totally sweet, bro.