so what is the biggest driver that you
have during your lifetime is it seeking
wisdom is it creating a better world for
ourselves and for others spiritual
expansion that's one day you'll come one
with the universe
well about thirty years ago I would
definitely have given you this answer I
was 23 I started to train companies
individuals groups nonprofit
organizations profit organizations and
as the years passed I started to notice
something
some organizations failed miserably and
some organizations succeeded but was
something about these organizations that
actually failed something that always
was the common denominator I couldn't
put my finger on it but looking at the
companies that actually succeeded there
was always the situation that people
wanted to work for someone the group
they were in but especially their leader
let's call it sergeant the funny thing
is those organizations that didn't have
that we're mostly the organizations that
had idealism in them they were firing
the people they were enthusiastic they
had the ideals written on the wall when
you walked in yet they failed it took me
some more years and a lot of hairs that
flushed down the drain of my shower to
actually find my finger or to put my
finger on it
it was personal recognition every place
where people were working actually for
personal recognition where the basis
that one and this was not a nice idea
because I liked all the stuff that had
to do with firing up people making
enthusiastic finding your inner sources
intrinsic information intrinsic
motivation unfortunately
we cannot get past that fourth layer of
Muslims pyramid and 95% of our lives we
are seeking personal information and
things are not going well with us at the
moment we don't get it so first thing
had to kneel down is what is personal
what is personal recognition it's funny
you can't even find a Wikipedia page
dedicated to the subject so here's my
definition personal recognition is to be
seen and to be accepted for who you are
and to get credit and acknowledgement
for the things you do from someone that
you actually wanted from that last one
is important let me give you the whole
thing again personal recognition is to
be seen and to be accepted for who you
really are and to get credit and
acknowledgement from somebody that we
really that you really want it from who
are these people we wanted from that was
a difficult one too
at first I thought bosses and also I
figured out well it must be the people
that have area that are very much
experts in their fields so their
compliment would be good their
recognition would be more important to
you actually isn't we want recognition
from people we have a relationship with
now we have to figure out what that was
relationship occurs when you just start
trusting someone and you start to tell
this person more about yourself and in
the end you tell more about yourself to
the person that you tell to other people
the more you trust someone the more you
tell that person and the more you have
told that person the more that person
becomes an expert on the field of who
you are which also means that their
advice is more important than those of
people than those of others and the
funny thing is that recognition is worth
to you more so the process of
relationship is you trust people
you tell them more the more you told
them the more you trust them and the
more you want their personal recognition
so mind you personal recognition has
nothing to do with compliments and this
may sound strange at first but how many
times do you give compliments to your
closest friends how many times do you
sit together and give each other
compliments actually if you think about
it you give money much more compliments
to stall so strangers then you give to
your friends in work or stuff we try to
reload or activities we try to realize
we actually do not want compliments
either we want people to acknowledge
what we're doing we want people to know
how difficult it is for us to this to
this to this very thing actually
everybody in this life has experienced
the feeling of castration sometimes when
a bus or somebody has to write you if
you gives you a compliment for something
that was actually very easy to do
because that moment you don't seek the
compliment as personal recognition but
as a sign he actually he or she actually
doesn't know what I'm doing at all what
happens if we are an organization where
we get recognition what happens if we
have relationships because we can only
get record to be only one personal
recognition from people we have
relationship with actually we thrive we
always feel that whatever we do or
whatever risk we take or whatever side
way we take from the KPI machine or from
what the official goals are that we get
respected that we get acknowledged that
somebody is watching us those
organizations have spoke in the
beginning that we're doing so well are
usually the people that have a lot of
middle management that actually care
about their people and actually have
relationship with them and now we dare
to take risks now the organization
becomes flexible because you try
something else you are in some kind of
group
to figure something out and you know
that at the end of the road you're not
going to be judged because she didn't
make your main kpi's you feel
acknowledged all the time you get person
you want the personal recognition of
your co-workers you want the personal
recognition of that direct leader that's
sergeant and this is where we start to
fail actually you see very little
organizations especially nonprofit where
we try to feed people the ideal of the
company you should do your best or you
should work your ass off for the very
simple reason we have an ideal in profit
organizations we have a goal we have a
KPI why do we shy away from this whole
principle that we want personal
recognition well basically because it
sounds so lame and sometimes when I work
with organizations in Holland or outside
it feel so lame when I say it we
actually work for firstly for personal
recognition it's this need for personal
recognition Western thing no it
absolutely is not I've worked with
companies inside outside and I've seen
Japanese that bowed to the flag before
of the company before they even start to
do training or whatever I've seen
Chinese they've had a complete -
mentality I've seen Africans that almost
took a tribal idea of how to be in an
organization actually very proud north
of South Americans and under this very
thin veneer of this is our culture of
the corporation of where we come from of
this country there is this need for
personal recognition so no this is
nothing to do with culture actually
funnily enough Germans seem to
understand this thing much better and I
think this is the sole reason why their
economy and also their nonprofit
organizations are doing always
relatively quite well they understand
the value of this
so back to where we work what happens if
we cannot get the recognition that we
want we work somewhere we can't get it
either either difficult the leadership
fails or something is wrong with the
relationships what happens is that we
try to get recognition personal
recognition from other sources it's a
basic need
we can't function without it it's like
water and the problem is that is the
moment we start to try to get this
personal recognition from let's say
sources that we should never be
dependent on now that's difficult what
does that mean some people in our life
we should not be dependent on the
recognition we like to get it but if you
get dependent on it trouble starts and
this is not something about companies
it's universal let's take our children
we have relationship with our children
in the app of course as much as we can
do we like it when we get their
recognition of course we like it what
happens if we need it they eat us up
that's actually their job they can
compare it to a credit it's absolutely
ok if the bank sends your credit card
saying we would love you to activate it
through internet and to use our credits
but we start to get into trouble the
moment we go to the bank and we say we
need to credit it's ok to get it but you
should not need it what happens in a
company or nonprofit organization or any
organization when we do not get the
personal recognition that we need or at
least want we start to get this
recognition we get we start to get this
need fulfilled in the outside world so
let's take for example a profit
organization you have these people that
go and that go to the clients and the
recognition they have better
relationship with the clients than with
their own leaders they have better act
they have better relationship did
recognition of the leader of the client
means more to them so you can understand
what happens to the profit they will
give it away because their recognition
is more important funny enough the top
of the organization and this also can be
a nonprofit organization actually thinks
that they are winning because hey we
have an incredible customer focus our
people even hang out with the clients or
with the target group outside of work
hours no they are getting their personal
recognition there so this need for
personal recognition and where things go
wrong in organizations where it cannot
be gained it's very hard to look at if
you don't know what you're watching for
but what you're looking for and
therefore it's very important to get
your own needs fulfilled for the
personal recognition that you want
through relationships because if you
don't you don't see the needs in others
either and then it will be very
difficult to understand why people want
to want your recognition and this can
lead to disasters since personal
recognition is not really subject we
talk about a lot of times it's a
disaster that we actually cannot
identify things go wrong for other
reasons so take a good look at it think
about it what do I need for two other
people need and what happens if we don't
get it
how much politics do it how much
politics and how much conniving for
positions and how much ineffective to
organizations become if we cannot get
the personal recognition we want either
from co-workers especially from direct
leaders time is up thank you very much
and have a great day