- Welcome to Flex on My Ex.
(group laughing)
The show where three hopefuls look for love
while they're hatin'-ass exes watch.
Each hopeful will compete to win the heart of one single,
but their former lovers will be lurkin'
every step of the way to try to shake things up
as they try to lock it down.
Our single on this episode is Jaclyn.
She's an influencer looking for a man of substance.
Will one of our hopefuls be the man of her dreams?
Or will their exes turn it into a nightmare?
I'm your host, Jazzy, and we are about to find out.
(upbeat rhythmic music)
What are you looking for in a man?
- So I work in the entertainment industry,
and I need a guy who is not jealous and insecure,
'cause I kind of get a lot of attention I guess you can say.
- You think? - Yeah. (laughs)
- So basically, you need somebody confident.
And who's not jealous. - Right.
And who's not hiding their exes.
- Well (bleep) they can't hide 'em today
'cause they're right here. (Jaclyn laughs)
All right, hopeful number one, talk to me.
- I'm Clavacia Love, I'm 23 years old,
and this is my ex-girlfriend.
- Hi, I'm Jameelah.
And we broke up because he has
a really hard time keeping to himself.
He's a frat boy, and he likes to use
his fraternity activity to get close to other girls.
- Good to know, okay.
What do you have to say about that?
- It's networking. (record scratches)
(group laughs)
- It's networking his (bleep).
- Okay, I don't want things to get too hot right now.
Okay, hopeful number two, Phillip, what's going on?
Tell me why you're here, tell me who your ex is.
- I'm here for her.
(group laughsing) I'm 22, and my ex is Mo.
- Tell me why you guys broke up.
- Phillip doesn't party.
He doesn't drink, he doesn't really do anything
other than just play video games.
- You wouldn't even compromise,
just going out for a night of fun with her?
All right, hopeful number three, what's going on?
- Chillin', how you doin'?
My name is Rian with an I.
And this is my ex, Miranda.
- Hey. - Hello.
- Tell us why you broke up.
- Well, you know, he likes to be in his phone,
scrolling, tapping, sliding in DMs.
So, you know, he might not be the best to trust.
- Hold on, first, she cheated on me.
(record scratches) - Whoa, out the gate!
- Switch that up real quick.
- [Jazzy] You cheated on him?
- Guilty.
- Let them get caught, we don't get caught.
- What?
- In round one, Jaclyn will ask the hopefuls questions
that will help her get to know you guys a little bit.
But here's the fun part.
The hatin'-ass exes get to intervene
and hold up a yay or nay card, you ready?
- Let's do it. - I'm ready.
- So I'm all about honesty
and owning up to our past mistakes.
So what's the biggest lie you guys have ever told your ex?
- Yeah, you're up first, Clavacia.
- I only lied to my ex-girlfriend one time.
And that one lie was me saying, oh, I'm at work,
I'm busy, I'm in school, I'm doing this, and I'm doing this.
But really I was planning a surprise party for her birthday.
- Oh. (bell dings)
(group laughs)
So it's true.
- He really did do that.
He knew that I loved exotic animals.
So he surprised me with a bunch of boa constrictors
and snakes and I was like, crying, I was so happy.
- Aw, I love animals too.
- You still got that exotic animal connect?
(group laughs)
All right, Phillip, tell me how you lied to your ex.
- My homies hit me up, they said let's go out,
I got tickets, let's go see a concert in L.A. downtown.
And I told her I was just hanging out with the boys.
And I was at a concert and she didn't know that.
- Is that true?
(bell dings) - Yay.
I'm just now finding out about this, but it's fine.
- You lying to go to concerts, bro?
Lie about some good (bleep).
Okay, Rian, tell us how you lied, 'cause I know you did.
- Okay, I'm a straightforward dude.
So I think the biggest lie is like,
when she tries to crack jokes I'm like, ha ha!
Well, I don't want to be mean.
It's a genuine laugh, just, you know, (laughs).
- I'm pretty funny so I don't know what he's talking about.
He's pretty honest, so I'll give him a yay.
He's pretty honest.
- Okay, moving on to round two.
The exes will present each hopeful with a piece of produce
they feel most resembles their member.
Then the hopefuls have to put the condom
on the phallic fruit or vegetable,
and demonstrate their best safe sex skills.
Jameelah, you're up first.
(group laughs)
- Oh, God, do I have to look?
(Jaclyn and Jazzy laugh)
- Be careful, because he will destroy you.
- My uterus!
- Yes, exactly.
- Ready? - Okay.
I'm ready. - Set!
Protect!
- Okay, so what I'ma say is I believe
in monogamous relationships, so we don't need those.
(record scratches) - You saw how quick
he threw them out?
I ought to beat you upside the head with this damn eggplant.
(group laughs)
So how do you feel about this?
- I haven't had sex in nine months.
(crickets chirping)
So. (laughs)
- Girl, be care,
(ladies laugh) like, just sayin'.
Be careful.
- 'Cause you probably got an STD.
All right.
All right, Mo, what did you pick for Phillip?
(drum roll rattling) - Don't do it.
- All I'm saying is the banana peel stays on.
(Jaclyn laughs)
- So Phillip, how do you feel?
Do you feel like this is accurate?
I mean, I like that is has a little slight curve to it.
All right, let's see if you like rubbers.
We going to see how you can put this on, okay?
Ready?
Set.
Protect!
(Phillip mumbles) (Jaclyn laughs)
- I busted the banana. - Damn, bro.
- [All] Oh!
- You know that happens when you have
a little extra skin on you.
(group laughs)
For someone who hasn't had sex in nine months,
did this turn you on just a tad?
- Not at all, no. (record scratches)
- [Jazzy] Because it's uncircumcised?
- I only had one that was like that before.
- Like that. (Jaclyn laughs)
Miranda, I saw you back there chuckling,
so I know this is going to be good.
Let's bring it on out.
- Oh, bro.
- Are you nervous?
- No, 'cause she hates, she likes to hate,
so I'm excited
to see what this is. - You're excited?
- [Miranda] I don't hate.
I enjoy.
(Jaclyn laughs)
- [Rion] Okay, okay.
- Okay? - For sure.
- [Jazzy] With or without the warts on it?
- Nah, none of that.
Yeah, you can trim that off real quick.
- Ready?
Set, protect!
- Protect, all right.
First, you got to make sure you pinch the tip and just.
- Look at it.
Come on.
He's pretty good.
It's not even on all the way.
- That's good, you need room.
You need room at the tip.
That's almost to the balls, though.
- Sometimes the balls need to be in there too.
You like that?
- That was a nice, strong, sturdy,
like, I don't know, it was nice. (laughs)
- Time for round three.
In this final round, we are searching
for skeletons in each hopeful's closet
by asking the person who knows them
the best and the worst, their exes.
Jaclyn, you ready? - I'm ready.
- All right, let's get to it.
- So trust is super important to me.
And there's no bigger breach of trust
than creeping on people close to me.
So exes, did he ever flirt with your guys' friends?
In other words, was he a total flirt or a one woman dessert?
- You ready?
Jameelah, you're first.
(drum roll rattling)
Total flirt.
- This is part of the reason that we broke up.
Because one of my best friends sends me a message,
a screenshot actually, of her DM,
where Clavacia slid in and said, hey,
do you mind posting a picture of me in your story?
I'm trying to get more followers.
He sends her a shirtless picture of him
in his like, football boxer pants.
And then she sends it to me like, did you tell him
to ask me this because he told me that it was okay.
- Okay, so should I start explaining now?
So I'm a fitness model.
And I was trying to market myself to different crowds.
Right?
- No, no, no! (group laughs)
You sound so thirsty.
All right, Mo,
let's see your answer. (drum roll rattles)
Okay, one woman dessert.
I can kind of see that.
- When I'm with someone, I'm with them.
- Okay. - I like that.
- All right, Miranda,
let's see what you got. (drum roll rattles)
Okay, one woman dessert again.
No, 'cause you were looking nervous before, don't try.
(group laughs)
Don't try to wink out now. - Like I said, no, hold up.
Hold on, like when I have my eyes on somebody, I like them.
- All right, last question.
- Opening your heart to someone is always scary.
So I got to know if these guys are worth the risk.
Exes, if you had the chance to date your ex again,
would you, yes or no?
- Exes, you guys have all your answers?
Jameelah, you're up first.
(buzzer buzzes) - No. (laughs)
- Is that a crying or a crying laughing?
- It's a crying laughing face.
You know, dating him, it was fun.
It was like I was dating my best friend.
- All right, Mo, what do you have?
(buzzer buzzes) No, with a heart.
- Phillip was always a great guy.
I just feel like our personalities
were very different from each other.
- How do you feel about that, Phillip?
- I feel good, I got no hard feelings with Mo or anything.
It was just love.
- All right, Miranda, what do you have?
(bell dings) Yes.
Really, why?
- He's a good guy and he's really fun,
you'll always have a blast with him and very spontaneous.
- So based on what you've seen, what can you tell us,
the good and the bad about these three hopefuls?
- So, hopeful number one, I mean,
the eggplant was pretty out there.
It made a statement in its non-condom fitting way.
Hopeful number two, you and your ex seem to have
a nice relationship, which is cool, it seems like.
And hopeful number three, you seem understanding
and you don't seem like the jealous type.
And your ex is beautiful by the way.
(clock ticks) (bell rings)
- You guys nervous?
- Little bit.
(Jaclyn laughs)
I've had my hands like this for like,
five minutes. - All right, Jaclyn.
Who do you think flexed on their ex the best?
(clock ticking) (dramatic music)
- Brian. - Brian?
(Jaclyn screams) (record scratches)
- It's Rion.
- She don't even know my name.
(Jaclyn laughs) Hey, I won though!
(contestants applaud) - All right, hug it out now.
Clap it up for these two.
Okay, don't get too close, you just met.
A huge congrats to Jaclyn and Rion for finding their next.
Would you like to be a contestant on Flex on My Ex?
Sound off in the comments.