hey guys welcome to a new video
so here is my weigh-in for today so um i am going to do a really quick grocery haul
while you guys are currently looking at my weigh-in this is like a random haul first things
first two low-sodium or less sodium taco seasoning packets we got some minced onion here whoa these
flakes look big flakes another word that i hate a bunch of fresh broccoli honestly if you guys are
eating frozen broccoli just please trust me when i say stop and get fresh because the difference in
taste is like crazy like fresh broccoli it has to be one of my most favorite vegetables so um
my girlfriend are obsessed with these uh so i got three of the italian dry salami they're just like
salami plates this one comes with gouda cheese toasted rounds and the italian dry salami i
wanted to get five but unfortunately the store didn't have five but they did have five of the
gyno gyno oh [ __ ] it's like genoa salami i don't even know but this one comes with white cheddar
cheese and toasted rounds last but not least i've got some colgate sensitive whitening normally i
use sensitive because i got obsessed with brushing my teeth after my hysterectomy it was so weird so
now i have really bad sensitivity to my teeth and i don't know how to fix that so i guess i'm gonna
try a different uh toothpaste so i wanted to give you guys an update on the piano that i'm building
so far i have done seven steps out of the 24 and it's looking incredible
look at this i have been having so much fun put some batteries in here so
like once this is pressed it like lights up i don't know why yet but we will figure it out
hey guys so i'm actually in the middle of cleaning my bathroom like i don't want to
be super annoying and be ranting and raving on here it's not mine it's not my intention but
so you guys know i'm down over 80 pounds it's a very hot topic right now with my
channel and people keep comparing back to when i lost 80 pounds before and i weighed in today
i reached a new lowest at 483.0 so that means i'm officially down 89.4 pounds and
i'm ecstatic and they're just like oh this again you've already done this and just like
when i lost 80 pounds in 2020
it's because of my cancer so i got my result on my results back and i do have cancer
i have womb cancer and uterine cancer
i know it's my fault because i didn't i'm sorry because i didn't see someone i knew there's been
a problem for so long um i had lost quite a bit of weight pretty quickly when my cancer was getting
worse pre-diagnosis so at the time i was thinking oh i'm losing weight because of me i was in such
denial because like you know i just got diagnosed with cancer and on top of that now people are
telling me the only reason why i lost weight was because i had cancer obviously major denial
because who wants to be told that after losing 80 pounds i don't think anyone does so cancer was
the main reason for my weight loss so when people compare the two i get super frustrated because
the weight loss before was a symptom of something that was literally killing me
and the weight loss now is because i'm actually doing it am i at a major stall
right now because i keep letting my eating disorder win yes but i lost these 80 pounds
cancer didn't in my opinion when i lost 89 pounds i don't mean to bring this up because i know it's
in the past but i've lost over 80 pounds in the last eight months because of me not because of
cancer so like when people keep going back to that like it's triggering it's offensive like
being diagnosed with cancer is like a huge trauma for me just like constantly seeing messages and
comments and people saying things like that like it's just really insulting and it's like offensive
majorly offensive like after i got my hysterectomy because they took the cancer out of me
which i'm so grateful for i gained all my weight back i'm kind of just like in my feels
i'm i really am right now okay so i was just editing the clip that i made uh the rant
that you just saw and it just got me thinking more like i remember when i was down the 80 pounds
before i was diagnosed and even afterwards uh people were blaming illnesses my cancer
like everything made me lose weight besides myself and obviously i was in denial at the point but but
now like to fit everyone else's narrative people keep going back to when i lost the 80 pounds even
though it's the same people who said the only reason why i lost the weight is because of cancer
just like i said in my fields doing a lot of thinking fixating um i just know i'm not
doing good enough but then it's also like frustrating that people keep bringing up
past things that i don't want to think about
what's up
okay
okay guys so today is the 9th of february here's my weigh-in
so i'm down over two pounds literally i told myself that i'm not gonna order takeout food
i'm gonna eat like a normal person normal serving sizes listening to my body eat when i'm hungry
but don't cave into the binging urges if i just learn how to eat reasonably weight loss will
will come pretty easily for me i've just been really stuck in a rut with like an addiction to
take out food and takeout food usually has so many calories and i know i can choose like low calorie
options and healthier options but sometimes i'm like what's the fun in that container
oh my god how are you doing are you off tick tock i don't know what are you girls doing on here
um we're looking for some friends oh we do i'm looking for baddies but
same thing where's miss piggy are you cheating oh she's here you want to see her yes
so i forgot to end this vlog i hope you guys enjoyed and i'll see my next one bye
so much