Please pause and read before you watch this video:
The 'How to Make A Decision' Exercise
Let's not beat around the bush, shall we?
Making a decision can be really really hard
especially when the stakes are high
and especially when we have issues with indecision in general.
We want to make the right decision
and we want to avoid making the wrong decision.
After all, for any decision there are positive and negative consequences.
But what most people don't know
is that the way to make the right decision
is to make a decision specifically in alignment with your values,
and more importantly,
how you prioritize those values.
A value is what you consider from your honest authentic core
to be most important.
For so many people there's an inconsistency
between what they value doing and what they are actually doing.
The reason this does not work
is because satisfaction with our own life
can only happen when the things we do
and the way we behave in the world towards others and towards ourselves
match our values.
At the end of the day
we need to be able to powerfully prioritize our top values.
Most especially, our Top Value.
If you're currently struggling with a decision
and would like additional information related to this topic,
you would benefit by watching three of my videos:
The first is: 'The Secret To A Happy Life'
The second is:
'Indecision (Decisions and Indecisiveness)'
And the third is:
'Why You Should Consciously Choose Consequences'
But today, I'm gonna share with you a priceless exercise
that will help you to make the right decision for you
no matter what decision it is that you're facing.
To do this exercise,
you're gonna take the situation that you're in
that is the choice that you're facing,
and you're going to look at
what any choice involved in that decision
is going to give you.
When you are doing this exercise
it's best if you come up with at least or around five things
that you would get
as a result of making any decision
that's a part of that choice.
When you do this exercise,
what you're essentially doing
is figuring out what values you are in alignment with
or would be making a decision for
by virtue of making any decision.
From there,
you're gonna take all of these things that you would get
as a result of making either or any decision
involved in this choice,
and you're going to arrange them,
all of them,
according to priority.
From there,
you're going to make the choice
that is aligned with the very top priority that you listed.
That is the right choice for you.
So, I'm gonna go over this again
I'm gonna write it down
so that you understand what exactly you are going to be doing.
Take whatever situation you're in
and figure out what making any of the choices involved in the situation
would give you.
Again, it's best if you come up with about five per choice.
From there, you're going to arrange all of these values
in order of priority...
Most important, to least.
You are going to make the choice that is most in alignment
with the highest value that you selected.
Doing so is currently the best choice for you.
So that you can understand how this exercise goes,
one of my team members is going to use herself as an example
to show you how to do this.
This is Corinna,
some of you have recognized her from videos we've done before,
she has been so kind to join us
and to walk us through her process
using this decision exercise
for one of the decisions that she's struggling with in her life.
Why don't you tell us what this issue is?
C: Okay, I know it sounds a little bit ridiculous
because it's not something like as serious
as some of you guys might do the exercise on,
but I'm actually having anxiety around this,
so I chose this for today's exercise.
T: And the decision is...
Going to the gym in the morning or sleeping longer.
Corinna here, used to be a professional athlete, by the way.
So, as a professional athlete
this is something which would cause a great deal more stress
than it would for the average person.
So let's let you off the hook.
So, when it comes to going to the gym in the morning...
Oh, by the way, what we're looking at is
she's been so kind as to write this down for us.
Alright, going to the gym in the morning
let's look at what we would get out of that.
These are values, by the way.
Okay.
C: Okay, so a peace of mind
that no matter how the rest of the day unfolds
I've got my workout in,
less gym anxiety,
because I prefer the morning gym crowd,
a sense of achievement,
more self-esteem and satisfaction
around my physical health and body image,
better mental health
as physical activity influences my mental and emotional state a lot,
more self-esteem because
I would feel like I'm doing the right thing
proving that I can be disciplined
and do what a lot of successful people do.
T: Okay, how about sleeping longer?
What do you get out of sleeping longer?
What would be the values that you're in alignment with
and acting for if you're sleeping longer?
C: That would be more rest
and therefore, readiness and endurance for the day,
gives me a secure time to connect with friends and family
as some of them live in time zones
that are ahead of where I live.
Feeling a sense of nurture
and not hating life first thing in the morning,
as I hate waking up super early,
especially when I don't get enough hours in,
more ease organizing my morning,
having time to get ready, etc...
which would be way more complex if I went to the gym,
I can avoid my fear of making everything worse again
by stepping back into my professional athlete mode,
as there's still pain and unhealthy patterns,
and a peace of mind and flexibility
knowing that I can easily be available
in case something comes up that requires my attention,
can be any area of life, but, for example, work.
T: Okay, so from there
what we do is to organize
these things that we would get from both lists
and we organize them in terms of priority,
meaning you decide based off of what these items are,
these values,
what value is most important
all the way to least important.
Now, right now, we're just dealing with two decisions,
two potential decisions:
"do I go to the gym, or do I sleep longer?"
for some of you who are in these decision points
there's gonna be more options,
like you may be working with a third or a fourth option even,
and you'll be doing the same thing with all of them
So, instead of two lists you're going to have four lists,
and you're gonna have to prioritize from all of those lists.
But since we're only working with two,
let's see what Corinna decided
when she decided to prioritize them...
what came out number one all the way to number 12 for you,
because you did six per,
this time you did six per decision right?
C: Yes
T: Okay, go for it.
C: Okay.
I'm ashamed, okay.
~ Laughter ~
But I decided, for now,
my highest priority would be more rest,
and then nurture,
and then, better Mental Health,
and then self-esteem,
ease,
peace of mind,
avoidance of fear,
sense of achievement,
doing the right thing,
flexibility and availability,
less anxiety and time to connect.
Which I have time to connect during the day too,
I'm just putting that out there.
T: You are going to make the decision
that represents what you put in spot number one.
Now when you're facing a more difficult decision
most likely what you're going to notice
is that number one and number two
are gonna be something from different lists
which is why it's so hard for you to make that decision
because it seems like a really high priority is juxtaposed to each other.
But, in your life
if you wanna live a happy life
you're gonna have to learn how to prioritize
according to what's most important.
That means the right decision to make in the circumstance
is whatever you wrote in point number one.
So, given that she wrote "more rest"
as her top value right now,
what decision does that make for you?
C: I'll sleep longer.
T: Sleep longer.
So, based off of doing this exercise she's going to sleep longer
rather than going to the gym in the morning.
You're just gonna have to find a way to exercise another time.
C: Correct.
I will definitely find that time every single day.
T: And by doing so,
you're going to be in alignment with your actual values.
C: Yep.
T: So, thank you.
C: Thank you very much.
As a side note,
this is the deck that I created called the Inner Compass Deck.
This deck is full, and I mean really full
of values.
And in the guidebook
I have a variation of this exercise,
where instead of you writing down
what you would get out of making either decision,
you look through this deck and figure out
which values align with which decisions.
Or you're essentially using the cards
to do the very same thing that I just demonstrated to you
with the use of the example of Corinna.
So, if you want a variation on this exercise
and to walk through it or be walked through it
by the guidebook,
there's also a different way of doing it with these cards.
I will be including a link to this deck
in the description of this video.
This exercise is epic
for literally any choice that you could be facing.
It's especially epic for those situations
where no matter how hard you tried,
you can't find a third option.
Therefore, two of your top values are juxtaposed against each other,
and as a result you're facing a very hard choice.
When you do this exercise,
you will be making your decision
based off of your top value.
Therefore, what is most important to you.
When you make a decision according to what's most important to you
what that means is that it has a meaning
and it has benefit to you.
You've decided that this is something
that you are truly in alignment with.
As a result, you're gonna have the energy
and be able to choose
to handle the consequences,
both positive and negative, that come with that choice.
Not only that, you will be making the decision
that is genuinely right for you specifically.
Have a good week.
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I wanna thank you personally
for the bravery that you have to step into awareness.
I'll see you in the next video.
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