Hello. We're back for some more of Ask Me Anything.
Why do I get myself into these things?
It'll all come back to bite me in the ass in the end.
One piece of advice I would like to give all teenage girls is
the things that you say to yourself in the mirror,
the things that you say that you can't do, that you're not allowed to do,
things that aren't for you.
Would you ever tell your friend, your best friend, who you love the most in the world or your sister or your mother,
that she is too fat or too ugly or too stupid to even try for things that would make her happy and feel good?
If you wouldn't, then you are not allowed to say it to yourself anymore.
Think about the things you say in the mirror in the morning sometimes when you're looking at your body.
Would you ever say that about a friend who looked the same as you?
I keep myself sane as a woman in Hollywood by not talking to most of the other people in Hollywood.
Because I think a lot of people who get into this industry,
I'm going to get into so much trouble for this,
I think a lot of people in this industry get into this industry because of a hole that is inside all of us.
There is a void in us that needs mass love because we didn't receive it at some formative time in our early lives.
And so, therefore, a lot of those people are sometimes bad for my mental health to be around.
And there's a lot of narcissism in this industry, of course.
And I'm sure I have it.
And I'm probably not good for some other people's mental health.
There's also a lot of
I guess being self-absorbed kind of comes into that, but not quite,
a lot of insecurity and a lot of competition.
And that can make me uncomfortable and it brings out something bad in me.
So I tend to stick to my friends who do other jobs when they're not famous
and often they're not even in this industry at all.
I like creatives and I like people who are interested in things outside of fame and what it is that I do.
I think it's really important for me to be around people who don't care about what it is that I'm doing.
Most of my best friends have literally never seen anything that I've done,
which is beyond like, oh, I just missed it.
It's beyond callousness.
That's a deliberate attempt to never give a fuck about what I do for a living.
And I've been doing this for 11 years, and some of them have never seen anything.
And I've been friends with them throughout that entire period.
Beyond my Instagram, most of my friends have no idea what I do for a living.
So that has been very good for me.
It's a little bit annoying, but that's the narcissist in me.
Generally I'd say it's made me a better person.
So just stick to your real friends.
And if you find real friends in this industry, a couple of whom I have,
then keep the ones who are the least toxic around you.
But good luck. Be careful. It's weird out here.
I don't care about threesomes.
I don't want to have one because I don't like waiting in line.
And I know that I would be the one that gets ignored.
And then I'd feel sad and left out.
So I just don't think that I have the security or sense of self or attention span to have a threesome.
I'd start thinking about other stuff or I'd try and snack.
I would def- I've tried to snack during a twosome before.
So I don't think I'm the
I'm not like an orgy guy.
I feel very uncool and self-conscious and worry about my pants
as in my underpants.
I'd feel bad about my moves.
I think i'd feel self-co
yeah I can't do it.
But I think other people should have threesomes, foursomes and fivesomes.
However many they want.
Have one hundredsome. I don't care.
It's your business.
Woof, there is such a big connection between mental health and chronic pain.
Part of which is that chronic pain is often something that someone else can't see,
especially like I have a chronic condition called Ehlers-Danlos syndrome
the short for it is EDS
and I am in constant pain.
But because that doesn't show on the outside, I look like a perfectly well person.
No one gives you enough care and space and sympathy
and you fucking need it sometimes
because it's so consuming.
It distracts you from everything you're doing.
It's always at the forefront of your mind.
At the very least, it's in the corner at the back, just going *Psst* all the time.
So it makes you feel angry with your body sometimes, which is a shame.
But it's human.
It makes you feel angry with yourself. It makes you feel resentful of other people.
It makes you feel depressed.
It makes you feel like your sometimes in a prison inside your body that you cannot get out of.
It makes you feel persecuted and it makes everything so fucking hard that sometimes you just don't want to do anything at all.
So it's frustrating and debilitating.
And people who have chronic pain should be treated like the soldiers that they are,
because just getting up out of bed everyday, if you even can do that,
is such a mark of heroism and stoicism and being such a soldier
and so treat people you know with chronic care with kindness
and do not think of yourself as anything other than a total legend just for getting through every day if you are someone who suffers.
I love talking about my abortion because I think it is one of the most important subjects in our generation.
The only side effect I've ever had from mine is relief.
And I think it is the single most important decision I've ever made and the best one I've ever made.
I was not in a dramatic situation.
My life wasn't in danger.
I wasn't a victim of rape or incest in how I got pregnant.
I was just not in the right relationship, not ready,
not financially stable enough, not emotionally stable enough,
not psychologically stable enough.
I didn't want a baby.
I would have hugely resented a baby at that time.
I was not in a stable place in my career.
I had dreams and things that I wanted to and deserved to achieve because I'd worked so hard for them up until then.
I just didn't want a baby.
And that's okay. That's an okay enough reason.
You don't have to have a super dramatic reason to not want to go through the biggest life change you can ever go through.
It's a huge hurdle in your existence if it's something that you don't want.
It can be glorious if it's something that you do want.
But it can just fucking ruin everything if it's not something that you feel comfortable with
and that you are ready for.
So I talk about it because I feel no shame whatsoever about having had my abortion.
It doesn't matter what anyone says to me.
People can leave ten hundred,
ten thousand comments even a day on my social media telling me that I'm a whore and a murderer.
They're wrong.
They are stupid and they are assholes.
I'm not sorry. It wasn't wrong.
Best thing I've ever done and my life is a million times better for that decision.
And if I choose to one day have babies. I'm so glad that will be my choice.