There never seems to be enough hours in a day.
Ever wonder what would happen if time just, I dunno, took a time-out?
What if you could make like Doctor Strange and stop time altogether?
It’s fun to think about when you imagine all the stuff you could do.
But what about the hypothetical reality?
(Ding Ding Ding!
For those of you paying close attention, yes “hypothetical reality” is indeed an oxymoron,
and you get 10 points.)
To answer that “time” question, you first need to ask another: what exactly is time?
You might consider it the moving hands on a clock or the first set of numbers we see
when we glance at our phone.
Perhaps it’s the way the sun travels across the sky or each birthday you celebrate.
It’s all of those things when you think about it.
But in straight-up scientific terms, time is the progression of events from the past
to now and then on to the future.
Physicists can make defining time a lot more complicated than that, but at the end of the
day, it’s a system of measurement.
Asking what time it is would be like asking what an inch is.
It’s just, an inch!
Bend your thumb and it’s the distance between the 2nd knuckle and the tip.
So, if we stop time, that means we have a measurement of zero.
In other words, we have nothing.
Think of it this way: remember learning about time, distance, and speed back in school?
Here’s a refresher: speed equals distance divided by time.
Let’s take our time measure of zero – uh-oh, it’s on the bottom of that equation!
Can you still hear your teacher saying “You can never ever divide by zero.”
It’s like if you have no pieces of gum, yet all your friends are asking for some.
Can’t divide or distribute nothing!
Fine, then let’s move that zero to another part of the equation so that the universe
doesn’t implode.
Time is also distance over speed.
So, zero equals zero, right?
Zero time, zero speed, zero distance.
In other words, if you stopped time, nothing would move.
“Yeah!
Just like in the movies!
You can walk around and touch stuff as it’s frozen mid-air!”
Oh, no, my friend, not even close…
When I say nothing moves, I mean NOTHING, nada, nyet, zippo.
There would be no light because photons – that is, the most basic unit of light and, theoretically,
the fastest-moving objects in the entire universe – can’t move either.
Since the photons aren’t moving and going into your eyes, you wouldn’t be able to
see anything at all.
And that’s just the beginning!
Air wouldn’t move either since it’s also made up of molecules, so say goodbye to breathing.
Not that your blood needs that oxygen because it wouldn’t be pumping through your veins.
With all molecules at a standstill, there’d be no heat either, so it’s also about to
get very cold.
Basically, without time, you’d be blind, unable to breathe, and frozen solid.
Sorry…
Beyond Earth, the stopping of time would also mean the basic forces of the universe would
also cease to be.
You know, like gravity?
Also, in Einstein’s Theory of Relativity, space and time are interconnected and interdependent.
So, without time, space can’t exist.
If you stop time, you stop everything as we know it.
No universe, no nothin’!
Well, that was a letdown!
Bummer…
Fine, let’s change the rules because the reality of the hypothetic is no fun in my
book.
Let’s say I’ve been gifted a sort of supernatural pause button.
The world around me just stops when I press it, but all that “laws of physics” stuff
stays the way it is.
The only catch: I can use it just once.
One pause.
One resume.
Let’s do this!
Wait, wait, wait –I first need to consider WHEN I’m going to hit pause, right?
I mean, if I temporarily stop time during rush hour on a holiday weekend, traffic is
going to be impossible.
If I do it in the middle of the night, nothing will be open and what fun is that?
Hmm, how about…
I dunno…
10:30 on a Tuesday morning?
Just before lunch, everyone’s at work, but all my favorite stores are still open.
Sweet!
Here we go, aaand, STOP!
Whoa, neat-o!
Look at all the people frozen in place!
Ha, I stopped everything just as that guy over there was tripping on the curb!
That’s gonna hurt when I start time back up later.
Agh, I’m getting distracted.
Ok, first thing’s first, I’m loading up on ice cream and video games!
I mean, what good is this time-stopping thing if I’m not to indulge my inner kid for at
least a week… or three?
…Hey, yeah, still me.
I finally beat that 200-hour fantasy RPG I never used to have time to play!
I’m well-rested, but I’ve gone up 2 pant sizes.
Now what?
Time to hit the gym!
How do I know how long I’ve been on the treadmill in this scenario?
Nevermind, I’ll just run laps, then hit the weights.
Oh man, I’m gonna be SO buff.
When I un-pause, I may just have to consider a new career as a professional bodybuilder!
Hey, maybe that cutie that lives in the apartment across the hall will notice my ripped bod?
Well, if I’m taking advantage of this time to get my body in shape, maybe I should work
on my mind too?
Instead of just watching re-runs of my favorite sitcom at the gym, I’ll listen to a few
audiobooks.
I’ll check out some documentaries while I’m at it.
Hit me up with your recommendations on what to watch and listen to down in the comments!
I’ve got aaaall the time in the world, heh-heh!
I’m starting to feel a little guilty about taking all those video games earlier.
Maybe I should return them to the store before un-pausing.
Yeah, that’d be the right thing to do.
I can’t quite return the ice cream, though…
I’ll leave some money on the counter.
There, now my conscience can rest assured.
No, hang on, I’ll just lay this mattress here for when this poor guy finally hits the
ground!
There ya go, buddy…
Okay, I’ve gotten in shape, looking good, feeling fantastic, sworn off any more “borrowing”
if ya know what I mean.
Now what?
I’d love to visit the zoo, but I can’t imagine the monkeys will be much fun to watch
when they’re paused, so that’s out.
I would catch a ball game but it’s still 10:30 AM, and everybody’s paused…
Wait, that’s right, all the people are frozen in time!
I’ve been maneuvering around them all this time and never even considered how my boss
would look better if he finally got rid of that cheesy mustache of his!
Let me pop into the Barber Shop and borrow this electric razor here.
I know!
I swore off borrowing, this is the last time, promise!
Just my boss’s mustache, and that’s it!
Oh, and a clown wig.
Actually, that one isn’t just for my boss.
Clown wigs for everybody!
One last thing before I unstop the world.
I’ve always wanted to have time to visit museums and cultural places.
Let’s start with Natural History – dinosaur bones, here I come!
I wonder what a brachiosaurus would do if it could stop time.
Probably do it right before the meteorite hit, I’d bet.
On to the art museum!
I’m gonna stare at these paintings and sculptures until they make sense if it’s the last thing
I do.
Like this one with the triangles.
I’m starting to feel inspired to create some art of my own.
Oh, there are a few empty spots on the wall here in the museum!
I think I’ll hang a few paintings of my own up and see how long it takes anyone to
notice.
Now I just need to clean this paint off my hands, and we’ll start time back up again.
As I turn off the faucet, I look up and for the first time, I take notice of myself in
the mirror.
Are those, wrinkles?
And my hair… is my hair… gray?
And didn’t there used to be a lot more of it?
How long has it been?...
Well, at least I finally got six-pack abs!
And just look at all the fun stuff I did!
Maybe we shouldn’t stop time because as it goes, we develop, gain experience, and
grow.
Ok, I’ll un-pause time now so that everybody else can do the same!
What would you do if you could stop time once?
Let me know in the comments below!
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Stay on the Bright Side of life!