- HEY, KUNAL. HOW ARE YOU?
- LOVELY. LOVELY TO SEE YOU.
- GOOD TO SEE YOU,
AND THE LAST TIME YOU WERE HERE,
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT YOUR SIX-DAY WEDDING.
- YES.
- IT REALLY WAS SIX DAYS.
- IT WAS SIX DAYS.
WE HAD ABOUT 1,000 PEOPLE AT THE WEDDING.
- MM-HMM.
- THEN WE RAN OUT OF MONEY,
SO WE COULDN'T DO THE SEVENTH DAY.
AND IT'S WONDERFUL.
- THAT IS EXPENSIVE TO HAVE A SIX-DAY WEDDING.
- IT IS.
IT'S VERY, VERY EXPENSIVE THING.
- UH-HUH, AND IT WAS ALL IN INDIA, RIGHT?
- IT WAS ALL IN INDIA, IN NEW DELHI.
- SO HOW IS MARRIED LIFE?
- MARRIED LIFE IS GREAT.
WE'RE TWO YEARS IN.
THE SECRET OF OUR MARRIAGE IS THAT WE HAVE TWO TELEVISIONS
IN THE MASTER BEDROOM.
- MM-HMM.
AND, SO--
- LIKE, RIGHT THERE AT THE FOOT?
- SO, LIKE, ONE--
SO THERE'S ONE THAT THE BED FACES LIKE THIS,
AND THERE'S ONE OFF TO THE SIDE,
WHICH IS INSIDE A CABINET THAT YOU CAN PULL OUT.
OBVIOUSLY, I GET THE ONE ON THE SIDE.
AND SO I HAVE HEADPHONES.
WE HAVE TWO SETS OF HEADPHONES TO LISTEN TO WHAT WE WATCH.
AND BASICALLY, SHE DOESN'T LIKE TO WEAR THEM.
SO WE NEGOTIATE EVERY SINGLE NIGHT
WHO GETS TO WEAR THE HEADPHONES TO WATCH THE TELEVISION.
SO I BASICALLY--THE THING I'VE LEARNED FROM MARRIAGE IS,
I'M AN EXPERT NEGOTIATOR NOW.
- SO, YOU HAVE THAT DIFFERENT A TASTE
THAT YOU DON'T AGREE ON THE SAME THING TO WATCH?
- YEAH.
- LIKE--LIKE, WHAT DO YOU WATCH AT NIGHT,
AND WHAT DOES SHE WATCH?
- I LIKE TO WATCH SPORTS. - MM-HMM.
- SHE LIKES TO WATCH FASHION STUFF.
- MM-HMM.
SO THERE'S NOTHING REALLY IN COMMON THERE.
- NO.
NO, THERE'S NOT.
THAT'S A SHAME.
SO--BUT DO YOU WATCH--
YOU MUST WATCH SOMETHING TOGETHER IN--
THERE MUST BE A TV IN ANOTHER ROOM IN THE HOUSE
THAT YOU WATCH TOGETHER.
- THERE IS.
ANOTHER SECRET TO MARRIAGE I'VE LEARNED
IS TO SAY YES TO EVERYTHING.
- UH-HUH.
SO SHE GETS TO BASICALLY WATCH
EVERYTHING SHE WANTS ON THE BIG TV,
AND I JUST SIT THERE AND SAY YES, AND I NOD.
AND I PRETEND LIKE I LIKE IT ALL.
- YOU'RE A GREAT GUY. - I KNOW.
- YEAH.
I MEAN, YOU'RE A LIAR.
- YEAH, I KNOW.
I'M SLIGHTLY DEPRESSED.
- YES, I WAS GONNA SAY.
AND YOU--AND I SAW A PICTURE OF THE CUTEST DOG THAT YOU RESCUED.
AND WHAT IS HIS NAME?
- HIS NAME IS BOBA FETT FROM STAR WARS.
- RIGHT.
AND--
OH, THE--
THIS IS--IT'S FUNNY WHAT THIS PICTURE IS.
I THINK HE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE JUSTIN BIEBER.
I SWEAR. I SWEAR.
SEE THE FACE.
I'M TELLING YOU.
- A LITTLE BIT.
- HE'S GOT THAT JUSTIN BIEBER POUT.
- YEAH.
WELL, HE IS A GOOD-LOOKING DOG.
HE'S A VERY GOOD-LOOKING DOG,
AND YOU RESCUED HIM, AND I LOVE THAT ABOUT HIM,
BECAUSE HE'S PROBABLY A VERY LUCKY DOG TO BE IN--
ALTHOUGH, HE'S--I DON'T KNOW HOW BIG YOUR HOUSE IS,
BUT I-I READ TODAY THAT YOUR RELATIVES CAME OVER--
WAS IT FOR CHRISTMAS?
- FOR CHRISTMAS, YEAH.
- AND THERE WERE 20 OF THEM?
- YEAH, 20.
20 INDIANS.
- AND HOW MANY--
- WHY IS THAT-- WE ARE INDIAN.
20 INDIANS, HILARIOUS.
- NOBODY ELSE SAYS, "I HAD 20 AMERICANS OVER."
- THAT'S TRUE, EXACTLY.
- SO HOW--HOW--HOW MANY STAYED AT YOUR HOUSE?
- MOSTLY ALL OF THEM.
- HOW BIG IS YOUR HOUSE?
- IT'S--IT'S NOT BIG ENOUGH TO FIT 20 INDIANS.
I'LL TELL YOU THAT MUCH.
WE--WE HAD TO RENT--
WE FOUND A HOUSE, LUCKILY, NEXT TO US
THAT WE HAD TO RENT.
AND I HAD AN ENTIRE SPREADSHEET, COLOR CODED,
EACH DAY WHERE LUNCH AND DINNER WAS
AND WHO GETS TO GO.
AND SO WE SPLIT THE ENTIRE GROUP UP IN--
THE ENTIRE GROUP INTO TWO GROUPS.
MY WIFE GOT TO TAKE THEM TO DO ALL THE FUN STUFF,
AND THEN I ENDED UP DOING ALL THE MUSEUM STUFF.
BUT THEN I BASICALLY HAD TO ENTERTAIN THEM SO MUCH,
THAT I JUST GOT SICK OF IT,
AND I JUST RENTED A BUS AND TOOK THEM ALL TO VEGAS.
- OH, WELL, THAT'S FUN.
- THAT'S LAS VEGAS.
- THAT WOULD BE A LOT FUN.
AND THEY MUST HAVE BEEN--
- I'M WEARING THE SAME THING.
- YOU ARE.
- OH, NO!
[laughs]
- YOU SHOULD--YOU'RE JUST SUPPOSED TO SAY,
"I JUST GOT BACK" OR SOMETHING.
NO, YOU HAVEN'T--
NO.
IT DOESN'T WORK.
YOU DIDN'T FOOL US.
NO.
YOU COULD JUST SAY YOU JUST GOT BACK OR SOMETHING.
- YEAH, I JUST-- NO, NOW I'VE RUINED IT.
- YEAH, YOU HAVE RUINED IT.