Captioning provided by MUHSEN (www.muhsen.org)
There are so many sisters in the community
who have never had the experience of seeing someone buried
and actually going through the process
that we've been talking about of watching someone
that you knew go underground, the dirt coming on them,
and the finality of that process as it takes place here.
"As-salatu 'alal maw-aati yerhamokum Allah"
And SubhanAllah, there are many ways to experience death.
In a growing climate of materialism,
where people are further deluded by life
and were certainly encountering so much that's harmful,
in terms of greed and materialism
and how we assign value to ourselves and to our lives.
Encountering death is so important and experiencing it,
you know, even in other ways
whether it's the ghusl of the dead body,
being there with someone when they pass away, you know
being with the family, comforting the family.
There are other ways to encounter death
and to be in close proximity to it,
that would soften the hearts.
Right, but there's nothing quite like the graveyard.
There is nothing quite like seeing a person go underground
or seeing the graveyard in general and being there.
Now, traditionally speaking, there is ikhtilaf.
There is a difference of opinion in regards to
where women could participate when it comes to the Janazah,
when it comes to the graveyard, when it comes to the burial.
And I wanna unpack this just a little bit InshaAllah ta'ala
and start off with what is permissible across the board
and what is prohibited across the board.
So we start off with what is permissible.
Attending Salat-al-Janazah is unanimously permitted
for women even traditionally in Islamic law, right?
To go to the Janazah and to pray the Janazah,
to attend it in the Masjid or on the lawn
or wherever it may be, to pray Salat-al-Janazah
bi-idhnillah Ta'ala, to have the same reward,
the qiraat that is the likeness of
Uhud in good deeds.
InshaAllah Ta'ala that's assured there.
What is prohibited across the board
exceedingly prohibited in fact, and causes harm to the dead.
So it's not just that it is sinful for the person
but could harm the dead is niyaha, is wailing.
And in the time of the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam,
the wailing was prohibited for men and women.
That means screaming loudly and shouting out things
and tearing clothes and things of that sort.
It was a particular practice that was associated
in Jahiliya with the women that would go out
and that were professionals at wailing
and doing these things to show grief for the dead.
And so the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam prohibited,
and in fact cursed, those that do niyaha,
whether it is men or women.
Now here, we have everything that's in between, right?
The Salat-al-Janazah, which is permitted for men
and women across the board unanimously.
And then the niyaha which is prohibited
for men and women.
And then you have what's in-between
which is following the Janazah
and then going to visit the graveyard.
When it comes to going to visit the graveyard
there is a narration from Aisha radiAllahu ta'ala Anha
She was actually returning back from the baqi'a
and someone asked her, where are you coming from?
O Um Al-Mu'mineen, O mother of the believers
where you're coming from?
So she said, I went to visit my brother Abdul Rahman.
And the response was,
"Didn't the prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
prohibit that?"
And Aisha radiAllahu ta'ala Anha responded and she said
that the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
used to prohibit it.
Okay. "Naha anzeeartu kubur." He used to prohibit it.
And then the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam,
"amara bi azaaratiha."
He in fact
commanded people to go and visit the graveyards
because it reminds you of death.
So what Aisha radiAllahu ta'ala Anha was saying is that
the prohibition on visiting the graves was for men
and women, but there is a particular emphasis
on women because of the practice of niyaha.
But then when the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
commanded the companions and made it not just permissible,
but made it recommended to go and to visit the graves
that included women as well so long as
they continue to abstain from either being known
as those that would frequent the graveyards
or those that would wail excessively mourn excessively
in the graveyards or those that would not observe
the hijab in the graveyard and things of that sort.
So visiting the graves according to a large group
of scholars visiting the graveyard is permitted
especially in accordance with this narration
from Aisha radiAllahu ta'ala Anha.
Now some of the scholars made a difference
between a differentiation between following the Janazah
and going to the graveyard outside of the Janazah.
And this is based upon, you know primarily narrations
that aren't necessarily authentic but there is
an authentic narration from Um-Atiya.
Um-Atiya radiAllahu ta'ala Anha
says that we were forbidden to accompany the Janazah.
To accompany the Janazah.
This means follow the procession, but not strictly.
Not strictly. Now, again, where is this in the timeline?
Is it when it was prohibited to do so as a whole?
Or is it afterwards and this remains.
So many of the scholars mentioned a dislike which is
what seems to be indicated by
Um Atiya radiAllahu ta'ala Anha.
And a lot of the scholars you know, went into different
reasoning for that, right?
And they said that at the end of the day
it's the practices that are frowned upon
and the practices of wailing and the practices of mourning.
And obviously following the Janazah
and going through that entire process would cause
more distress, is a more tasking environment
and hard thing to encounter, than going to the graveyard
outside of the Janazah.
And then some of the scholars, they say that
it's about the elements. If a woman abstains
from the elements that are prohibited,
then she is permitted to even accompany the funeral
procession and to witness that.
One of the evidences that some of the scholars actually use
is an incident that's very famous, that the Prophet
SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam came across a woman
that was weeping over her lost child.
And as she was weeping,
the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
told her to be patient and she responded
and she said, you know, "What do you know about my tragedy?
What do you know about my museeba?"
and the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam walked away.
And some of the people told that woman,
"Do you know who that was?" And she said, "Who?"
They said, "it was the Messenger of Allah,
SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam."
So she immediately goes to apologize to the Prophet
SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam,
and the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
mentions to her what, "As-sabr 'inda as-sabr matil ula."
that true patience is at the first stroke of calamity.
So some of the scholars mentioned that the Prophet
SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam did not remark on her
being present
or her grief, but rather the Prophet
SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
taught a valuable lesson in patience at those moments.
And that is the type of patients that is needed
for anyone that walks that trail.
It's not just observing the rules.
It's also making sure that we derive the full benefit.
And that's true for both men and for women.