[Screaming]
Believe it or not,
the following films actually got made and were released in the 21st century.
[Catwoman]: Cat got your tongue?
[Narrator]: Welcome to Watchmojo.com,
and today we're counting down our picks for the Top 10 Worst Movies of the 2000s.
[Edward Malus]: But they did fail. I saw the, uh, photo!
[Sister Summersisle]: Yes, they failed, all right. Disastrously so.
[Narrator]: For this list, although we can all agree that there are different levels of Bad,
we'll be looking at North American big-budget studio productions.
[Timothy Walker]: Now, just remember. Whatever it is, it could always be worse, you know.
[Narrator]: We'll be basing our choices on a mix of critical and commercial success,
or rather a lack thereof, the quality of the films in terms of story, effects, acting and so on
as well as how they're generally perceived these days.
[Angus Tran]: You look like an orange with lips.
[Narrator]: Movies that never got an official wide theatrical release
like 'The Room' won't be included.
[Johnny]: You are tearing me apart, Lisa!
[Narrator]: This is a part of a series of videos, spanning the decades.
No 10: The Fog
[Sean Castle]: Ah, Spooner, the engine's dead.
[Spooner]: Nobody care about that.
[Narrator]: The Noughties were notorious for giving us dozens and dozens of subpar horror remakes and sequels.
[Mayor Tom Malone]: You tell your pal, when he thaws out, he better have a damn good story.
Although these films can populate their own worst movies list,
the biggest offender was clearly this mess of a film.
[Stevie Wayne]: Somebody please beam me out of here !
The Fog is an epic slap in the face to horror legend John Carpenter and his classic ghost story.
It fails on all grounds, as we watch people run away from vapor for a 103 minutes.
It doesn't scare you, thrill you, or make you feel any emotion except boredom.
It is literally as interesting as watching fog roll by!
[Stevie Wayne]: Now, what kind of fog moves against the wind?
[Dan]: You got me!
No 9: The Master of Disguise
[Pistacchio disguised as Terry Suave]: This is what you're doing. This is what I want you to do.
People cannot deny that Saturday Night Live alum Dana Carvey is a brilliant mimic and impersonator.
After watching this film though, it's difficult to see where this brilliance went !
[Pistachio Disguisey]: Okay. So you want to play games? Let's play games!
[Laughing]
Who is your daddy?
[Narrator]: In this comedy fantasy, which was co-written by Carvey himself,
we watch as a bumbling Italian waiter named Pistachio Disguisey - We are not joking! -
who's obviously destined to be a master of disguise,
tries to thwart a criminal mastermind and save his parents.
[Pistachio Disguisey]: I can't turn mud into oatmeal, for example. I can't build a spaceship that will travel to Pluto.
[Jennifer Baker]: No, but... you can find a way to rescue your mama and your papa.
[Narrator]: Offensive stereotypes and non-stop fart jokes punctuate a random series of events
that seems to have been collected from failed sketch ideas.
[Pistachio disguised as Turtle Guy]: Am I not Turtley enough for the Turtle Club?
[Narrator]: This kind of humor is akin to children's films, but PLEASE don't subject your kids to this!
[Pistacchio]: What if harm found its way to you?
Terrible terrible turtle harm. Would that change your mind?
No 8: Drangonball Evolution
[Film narrator]: A warlord named Piccolo came from beyond the Stars bringing darkness and chaos to our once peaceful world.
[Narrator]: The decision to make this film adaptation of the beloved anime and manga live action at all
was the first major mistake.
[Piccolo]: With this Drangonball, I take my vengeance upon the Earth.
[Narrator]: Telling you that they cast Caucasians and Asian roles and employed horrible special effects
doesn't even come close to explaining everything else that went wrong.
[Goku]: Let us out, now!
[Narrator]: Drangonball Evolution pretty much ignored its source material and created an alternate Americanized universe
as we follow a bored and annoying Justin Chatwin as he delivers some of the worst dialogue ever written.
Oh, and there's something about Dragon balls thrown in there, just in case!
[Goku]: I don't know what you're talking about. This is a Dragon ball. Susinchu. Four-star ball.
I promised my grandfather I would keep it safe. So I'm not letting anyone take it from me.
[Narrator]: Fans just wanna forget this. And we apologize for bringing back traumatizing memories.
[Bulma]: Stop! You both have to stop!
[Goku]: Now, I am going to end it.
No 7: The Adventures of Pluto Nash
[Pluto Nash]: You blew up my wood barstools!
You know how hard it is to get wood on the Moon?
[Narrator]: Very few comedic actors have risen so far only to crash so hard later on.
And The Adventures of Pluto Nash marked the beginning of Eddie Murphy's meteoric decline.
Anybody remember Norbit?
[Rasputia]: How you doing?
[Narrator]: In The Adventures of Pluto Nash, Murphy stars as a club owner / ex-con living in a futuristic colony on the moon.
[Pluto Nash]: Because they're about to approve gambling in this town.
If Crater gets his way, they'll turn the whole Moon into a big casino.
[Narrator]: Then, more stuff happens with gangsters, androids and clowns that nobody cared about.
Does anybody even remember the plot of this movie?
Although Eddie Murphy seems to be having fun, you can tell that he knew this was going Nowhere!
[Pluto Nash]: How did they find us?
[Assistant]: Obviously you did something stupid.
[Narrator]: It's too silly to be a Sci-Fi adventure movie,
but also, shockingly, lacks any actual form of comedy.
[Pluto Nash]: We're gonna run out of air long before we need food and water. Trust me.
No 6: Son of the Mask
[Tonya Avery]: Okay, I'm just gonna say it. That was flat out embarrassing.
[Narrator]: If you know who thought The Mask could have worked without Jim Carrey,
please show him or her this sorry excuse for a movie.
[Tim Avery]: Who are you?
[Loki]: I am Loki, God of Mischief.
[Tim]: Yeah, and I'm Tim, God of Crazy Babyland. Will you get out of the way?
[Loki]: That baby is born of the mask- my mask.
Now, where is it?!
[Narrator]: Lacking any sense of charisma, style or actual laughs,
this sequel decides to appeal to a younger audience
and features crude humour and silly obnoxious characters instead.
[Loki]: I'm a god.
I can shape shift.
I can create stuff out of nothingness.
I can alter the fabric of reality,
so, please, quit being a knucklehead.
[Narrator]: With Loki back on earth looking for his mask,
it of course falls into the wrong hands
And we're then introduced to one of the most unlikable lead characters ever portrayed on film.
[The Mask]: Hey, Loki.
[Tonya Avery]: Honey, you look hot!
[The Mask]: Give me back my son!
[Narrator]: Jaime Kennedy and his terrifying toddler just pretty much scream and drool
throughout this very inadequate sequel.
And needless to say, that Does not make for a very compelling movie.
[Tim]: Stop it!
This is insane!
[Baby giggling]
[Tim]: Point it down!
No 5: Catwoman
[Catwoman]: Meow!
[Narrator]: Here's a movie executive board meeting we can't imagine happening:
Hey guys! The campiness of Batman & Robin was such a success.
Let's create the same cheesy atmosphere for this Batman spin-off and not use Batman at all!
Extra points to Halle Berry for agreeing to do this fresh off her Oscar win though.
[Catwoman]: Cats come when they feel like it.
Not when they're told.
[Narrator]: It won Razzies for worst picture, screenplay, actress and director
and everybody, even Halle Berry, agreed that This was a Piece of garbage!
Not only did it have barely anything to do with the DC comics character,
but it also lacked any strong female characters, action sequences or even a compelling plot.
Where is Michelle Pfeiffer when we need her?
[Laurel Hedare]: Game Over.
[Catwoman]: Guess what.
It's overtime.
No 4: Gigli
[Ricki]: It's turkey time.
[Larry Gigli]: huh?
[Ricki]: Gobble, gobble.
[Narrator]: Thanks to Bennifer 1.0, this monstrosity received way more attention that it deserved.
However, that didn't stop the movie from being among Hollywood's most expensive bombs ever.
[Larry Gigli]: In every relationship there's a bull and a cow.
It just so happens that in this relationship right here with me and you,
I'm the bull, you're the cow.
In Gigli, Ben Affleck is a mobster who needs to kidnap a prosecutor's mentally handicapped brother
in order to help a crime boss, played by Al Pacino, avoid prison.
[Louis]: Who's this?
[Brian, mockingly]: Who is this?
[Laughing]
[Louis]: I don't find this funny.
[Brian]: Who is this?
[Louis]: Is this the retard?
[Narrator]: You all guessed right. This is clearly a romantic comedy.
This movie is offensive to the mentally challenged, to lesbians and to any audience members with eyes or ears.
[Ricki]: There is no place, nowhere, that has been the object
of more ambitions, more battles than the sweet, sacred mystery
between a woman's legs that I am proud to call... my pussy.
[Narrator]: After winning six Razzies, it later won a seventh for Worst Comedy of the Razzies' first 25 years.
Well deserved!
[Gigli]: I'm not sure how to take that.
No 3: Disaster Movie
[Enchanted Princess]: What magical creature are you?
[Crashing]
[Narrator]: We can't help but wonder if the powerhouse pair made up of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer
know how much they can be disliked in the movie industry and by moviegoers.
[Will]: How'd you end up there?
[Enchanted Princess]: Drugs.
(Accentuating) Lots and lots and lots of mind-altering, enchanting drugs!
[Narrator]: Nevertheless, they continue to turnout these horrible parody films,
and someone, apparently, keeps giving them money to do so.
[Will]: I know you guys think I'm crazy
but all these disasters have something to do with the crystal skull.
[Juney]: It's like TMTH.
[Calvin]: TM what?
[Juney]: Too much to handle.
[Narrator]: Somebody should show these two the definition of parody.
It does not mean dress up like a famous character and make fart noises.
Although 'Meet the Spartans', 'Epic Movie' or any of their other movies could easily fit in this list,
we wanted to spare you the trauma and just sight THIS DISASTER.
[Prince Caspian]: It's the guy who ruined Star Wars.
[Will, bizarrely screaming]
No 2: Alone in the Dark
[Edward Carnby]: What the hell is going on here?
[Narrator]: Especially known for his video game adaptations,
Uwe Boll has built a reputation for directing some of the worse movies of all-time,
with most of his productions becoming critical and box office disasters.
He also doesn't care what you think!
[Edward Carnby]: Just because you can't see something doesn't mean it can't kill you.
[Narrator]: Although 'House of the Dead' deserves a special mention,
it's his other video game adaptation that's our runner-up.
[Edward Carnby]: Fisch, the list of people I trust is short.
I'm not making it shorter.
[Narrator]; In 'Alone in the Dark', Christian Slater uses his special powers to chase after these demonic creatures
that used to be worshiped by an extinct civilization.
And it is EPICALLY BAD!
[Edward Carnby]: It's ... 713!
They implanted us with those things.
[Narrator]: Before we reveal our Number 1 pick,
here are some honorable or, in this case, Dishonorable Mentions.
[Billie Frank]: What's this?
[Dice]: Oh, this is escargot. Snails. It's like a French delicacy.
[Billie Frank]: hmm. So somebody went all the way to France for this?
[Dakota Moss]: So my finger got caught off. And nobody did it.
Who's gonna believe that?
[Elliot Moore]: We're just here to use the bathroom,
and then we're just gonna leave.
I hope that's okay.
[Agent Jeremiah Ecks]: Where do you get all this ordnance?
[Agent Sever]: Some women buy shoes.
[Nerva]: V, wait!
[Amber Leighton]: Why do you have a gun on your ship, Peppe?
[Giuseppe]: It's a flare gun.
[Amber Leighton]: A flare gun, huh?
[moaning]
No 1: Battlefield Earth
[Terl]: Do you want lunch?
[Narrator]: Many of our entries can be seen as career-killers,
but Battlefield Earth brought John Travolta to an all-time low.
[Terl]: Oh, Thank you sir. I don't know if I could have kept my sanity
to be here another five cycles.
[Narrator]: Although most actors are forced to take these steps down for a paycheck,
Travolta spent years bringing this movie to the world
claiming its source material was better than Star Wars.
[Clinko Learning instructor]: Please forgive my pretension as I try to educate you in Psychlo
the noble language of our superiors.
[Narrator]: Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard wrote the book in an attempt to bring the religion to younger audiences,
and that book serves as the basis of the Sci-Fi action flick.
Needless to say, the world wasn't interested!
[Terl]: You are pathetic. You wouldn't last one day at the academy.
[Narrator]: When the most horrible acting you've ever seen is topped by a camera work that
will give a cramp in the neck, it's not surprising that you have a recipe for unintentional hilarity.
[Evil Laughs]
[Terl]: Stupid humans.
[Narrator]: Do you agree with our list?
[Gigli]: What do you think?
[Narrator]: What do you think is the worst movie of the 2000s?
[Pluto Nash]: Yeah. l don't want to be the big dufus.
[Narrator]: For more entertaining Top 10s published everyday,
be sure to subscribe to WatchMojo.com
[Goku]: I must have faith in who I am!