THANKS FOR BEING HERE, EVERYBODY IT WAS A BIG WEEKEND THIS
WEEKEND FOR POLITICAL NEWS.
FIRST OFF, FRANCE ELECTED A NEW PRESIDENT, YEAH.
CENTRIST CAN DAD EMMANUEL MACRON WON THE FRENCH PRESIDENTIAL
ELECTION DEFEATED THE FAR RIGHT CANDIDATE MARINE LE PEN.
MACRON WON BY A LARGE MARGIN EASILY GETTING MORE VOTES, WHICH
MOST AMERICANS WILL BE SURPRISED TO LEARN IS HOW YOU WIN MOST
ELECTIONS IN ALMOST ALL THE COUNTRIES.
DURING HER CAMPAIGN LE PEN RAN ON AN ANTI-IMMIGRANT PLATFORM.
SO THIS ELECTION IS PROOF THAT PEOPLE WILL OVERCOME THEIR FEAR
AND INTOLERANCE, SO LONG AS IT MEANS THEY DON'T HAVE TO VOTE
FOR A WOMAN.
NO, I'M WITH YOU, I'M'S THE SAME.
I'M ON YOUR SIDE, THAT'S WHAT I AM SAYING.
MEANWHILE, BACK IN THE UNITED STATES HOUSE REPUBLICANS SPENT
THE WEEKEND DEFENDING THE BILL THEY JUST PASSED TO REPLACE
OBAMACARE.
NOW HEALTH CARE IS INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT.
SO I'M SURE THESE REPUBLICAN CONGRESSMAN READ THE NEW BILL
VERY CLOSELY, RIGHT?
>> DID YOU ACTUALLY SIT DOWN AND READ THE ENTIRE BILL PLUS ALL OF
THE AMENDMENTS?
>> I WILL FULLY ADMIT, WOLF, I DID NOT.
>> DID YOU READ THIS ENTIRE BILL?
>> YEAH, I WOULDN'T SAY-- YES, I TURNED TO EVERY PAGE.
AS TO WHETHER OR NOT I GOT THROUGH SOME OF THE DETAILS ON
SOME OF THE PAGES.
>> HAVE YOU READ THE WHOLE BILL?
>> OH GOSH.
(LAUGHTER).
>> James: JUST LIE, JUST LIE, PRETEN YOU READ IT NONE OF US
ARE APPROXIMATING TO READ IT WE WOULDN'T HAVE KNOWN.
ONE OF THOSE GUYS SAID I TURNED THROUGH EVERY PAGE.
THAT'S NOT READING.
BY HIS DEFINITION, I'VE READ THE ENTIRE ENGLISH OXFORD
DICTIONARY, THE BIBLE AND MY CBS CONTRACTS.
NOW WHITE HOUSE CHIEF OF STAFF REINCE PRIEBUS RESPONDED TO
CRITICS OF THE BILL SAYING IF YOU HAVE A PREEXISTING CONDITION
THIS PRESIDENT IS NOT GOING TO LET YOU DOWNMENT AND HE BETTER
HOPE SO BECAUSE THE NAME REINCE PRIEBUS SOUNDS LIKE A
PREEXISTING CONDITION.
DOESN'T IT?
I'M AFRAID WE HAVE BAD NEWS.
WE FOUND TRACES OF YOUR REINCE IN YOUR PRIEBUS.
NOW I KNOW YOU'RE ALL THINKING, YOU ARE YOU ARE SITTING HERE
THINKING THIS IS ALL WELL AND GOOD, JAMES, HEARING THESE
STORIES BUT WHEN ARE WE GOING TO GET TO THE STEVEN SEAGAL NEWS,
THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE THINKING, RIGHT?
I KNOW, REGGIE.
WELL, WAIT NO LONGER.
HERE ST. ACTOR STEVEN SEAGAL HAS BEEN
BANNED FROM UKRAINE FOR FIVE YEARS AFTER BEING DEEMED A
NATIONAL SECURITY THREAT.
YEAH, BANNED FROM THE COUNTRY.
SEAGAL IS A BIG SUPPORTER OF VLADIMIR PUTIN AND THAT IS WHAT
GOT HIM IN TROUBLE.
FOR EXAMPLE SEAGAL SAID IN AN INTERVIEW THAT HE THINKS PUTIN'S
INVASION OF CRIMEA WAS QUOTE VERY REASONABLE.
NOW HERE'S WHAT IS NOT REASONABLE.
ASKING STEVEN SEAGAL WHAT HE THINKS ABOUT THE INVASION OF
CRIMEA.
YOU WILL NEVER HEARSAY, I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THE ECONOMY OF
BRAZIL, I KNOW, LET'S ASK JEAN CLAUDE VAN DAMME.
FINALLY TONIGHT WE WANTED TO SHARE THIS VERY ODD STORY.
AFTER FINDING OUT HER HUSBAND WAS CHEATING ON HER, A WOMAN IN
COLOMBIA ATE HER AND HER HUSBAND'S ENTIRE LIFESAVINGS OUT
OF SPITE.
SHE SAID $9,000 IN CASH.
I KNOW.
YOU'VE GOT TO GIVE HER CREDIT.
SHE PUTS MONEY WHERE HER MOUTH IS.
I MEAN-- I MEAN HER DOCTOR DID TELL HER SHE NEEDED TO EAT MORE
GREENS.
IF SHE WANTED TO CONSUME $9,000 SHE SHOULD HAVE JUST GONE TO THE
SALAD BAR AT WHOLE FOODS.
SHE DIDN'T GO TO THE HOSPITAL IN A AMBULANCE, SHE WENT IN AN
ARMOURED CAR.
WHEN THEY ASKED HER WHAT IS WRONG IN THE ER SHE SAID CASH ME
INSIDE, HOW ABOUT THAT.
AFTER THE WHOLE ORDEAL, THE DOCTORS ASKED HER HOW SHE WAS
GOING TO PAY THE MEDICAL BILLS.
SHE SAID DON'T WORRY, I GOT MONEY COMING OUT OF MY ASS.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
GOOD NIGHT.