21st's in the Cook Islands culture is very important
because it's a rite of passage.
Because of Covid my mum and my stepdad are stuck in Raro
but I really want them to be here for my 21st.
My mum and my stepdad currently live in the Cook Islands.
Unfortunately, my mum won't be attending my 21st this year.
She was planning on coming,
but her flight got cancelled
and she can fly over to New Zealand with no problems,
but getting back home is another thing.
And because she has work,
she really can't afford to be stuck here.
I'm feeling a little bit stressed
because I've got my stepdad coming from the Cook Islands.
He's bringing over majority of the stuff
that is needed for the 21st.
Auckland is currently in lockdown.
So that will make travel really hard for them.
So everything's sort of hanging on him at the moment,
and him being here.
The main things that we need for a 21st,
especially for a Cook Islands 21st, is a key.
That's your gift from your parents to you.
It's the biggest gift that you can have.
It's the key to your future,
the key to your life.
That's the only thing
that will be from my mum.
That's gonna be there on that night.
Yeah.
I am Cook Islander on my mum's side.
On my dad's side,
I am New Zealand Māori
from the iwi of Ngā Puhi.
When I was eight I moved to the Cook Islands
with my mum and stepdad.
And now I study in Wellington.
I can say with confidence
that I do feel more connected
to my Cook Islands Māori side.
I feel like it's really important to be connected
with my Māori side before I turn 21,
because I want to be connected
with all of my cultures
before I transition into an adult.
I feel like I'm an outsider essentially
from my own culture.
This is 'cause they
don't make teabags strong anymore.
You gotta double it up
or triple it up.
I was in my twenties when I first saw my mum
actually using te reo Māori, right.
Like I was brought up in an environment of,
we're fully immersed in the
Pākehā way of doing things,
and so we just did it.
That was normal for me.
I guess that just transferred to, you know,
when we brought you up.
You saw very little of my Māori side.
Can you tell us about how koro went
from the name Peihana to Bae?
My dad's name is Peihana.
If you shorten it, it becomes Pei, P-E-I.
Pākehā then
weren't even able to pronounce Pei.
So they changed it to Bae.
And now my dad's name is-
Bae.
Known as Bae.
Did you know Dad was Bae as well?
Yeah.
For the longest time.
Yeah.
Yeah we have cousins who
will say how's Bae?
Who's Bae?
You gonna be 21 soon.
My gosh.
Yeah, awesome.
She's like my baby.
So if I go to sleep at night and she's in my dreams
I see her as a baby,
and she's gonna be 21.
Have you got the live stream all sorted
for your mum tomorrow?
No, not really.
Huh?
No, no, I do.
I've got an idea of what I want to do.
We just haven't tested it out yet.
Yeah.
Uncle Pania's flying over as well.
He's on the flight, on the plane at the moment.
Well, that's gonna be interesting to see
if he can get through.
I know.
The border.
I know.
Right, so he supposedly has the key?
Yeah, he has the key with him.
Yeah, have we got plan B just in case
that key doesn't arrive?
Ah, nope.
This is basically your 21 years of life
summed up into this one evening,
or this one night.
And you don't really have a second chance to do this.
Auckland to Wellington.
I'm trying to follow it.
Yeah, can I see if that flight has landed?
That would be great.
It's not even letting me follow the flight
and see if it's arrived.
My stepdad's supposed to be arriving on this flight
that's coming in soon.
I really hope he's on that plane
because he also has the key
and the key is the most important thing for this 21st.
So let's just hope he's there.
Still at the airport?
We're on our way to the airport now.
Okay ra, we'll be there soon.
Okay, bye.
He's arrived.
He's at the baggage collection.
Okay.
Praise the lord.
Okay.
Good.
Good, good, good.
Yay.
That's great.
He's right there.
Hi.
It is hard to think
that my mum won't be here for my 21st
'cause she's been there for me my entire life.
And I thought she would be there for me
for this big moment.
Kia orana.
Kia orana, how are you?
I'm good.
I'm getting my makeup done at the moment.
It is heartbreaking not to be able to be there,
because it is your, and I and our journey.
Yeah, it became a 21st that we didn't want,
but eventually grew to
sort of enjoy.
Accept.
Yeah, accept.
I'm really proud of the young woman that you've become,
because we've never had issues.
So when people are complaining about
"Oh my gosh females as a teenager."
"What a pain."
Well, I never experienced that with you.
If anything, I just had my best friend
just growing with me throughout the entire time.
21st in Cook Islands culture is a very big deal.
If you're back home
that means that you have a very big party.
You'll invite all of your family.
So it's a very, very big thing.
Thank you.
So right now,
there's going to be the presentation
of Poe Tiare's key.
Oh, open it.
Oh, does it open?
Okay, can I just,
Oh my gosh.
It's for my jewellery.
It's a jewellery box.
Mum couldn't make it here today.
This whole thing was planned for her to be here.
My mum means everything to me.
She's raised me.
She's my best friend.
She's my closest companion.
For her not to be here tonight
absolutely breaks my heart.
But I'm glad that I have the opportunity to spend it
with every single one of you here tonight.
I think the thing
that I value the most about growing up
in the Cook Islands was the community.
You will always have a community to fall back on.
My identity is surrounded by my culture
and it's a beautiful thing.