Gotta be in top physical condition for today, Gary.
[meowing]
[grunting]
[panting]
[grunting]
[music playing]
[chattering]
[music playing]
[chattering]
[music playing]
[chattering]
[music playing]
[chattering]
[music playing]
[chattering]
[music playing]
[chattering]
[music playing]
Don't worry, Squidward.
I've got it all figured out.
He won't be able to eat us because I wished
that the Dutchman was a vegetarian.
[everyone] Hooray!
We're home!
You did it, SpongeBob. We're safe.
But why have we been turned into fruits?
Hey, I get a wish, too. Fruit prevents scurvy!
♪ Christmas feels like The very first Christmas to me ♪
[singing]
Okay, pay attention, SpongeBob.
Now, we're gonna make picket signs.
This is a very important part of striking.
Like this, Squidward?
Not a picket fence, you ding dong! Picket sign!
How's this?
No. This is a picket sign.
"Krusty Krab Unfair", short, sweet and to the point.
How about this, Squidward?
SpongeBob, it's "unfair", not "funfair"!
A funfair? Where? I could go for some fun.
At the Krusty Krab.
I never thought I'd say this, but... go ahead in.
Really... I can go in?
Oh, my gosh, I never thought this moment would come!
I, SpongeBob SquarePants, am tough enough
to get into the Salty Spitoon!
This is the happiest day of my life!
[sirens blaring]
Sandy?
[groaning]
What happened?
You ran inside and slipped on an ice cube.
...know your name.
Uh! Eh.
[mumbling]
The fork on the left?
Heh. Stop joking. Tell 'em your name.
My name?
What's his name?! What's his name?! I've got nothing on a name!
Come on, baby, what's the name?!
We threw out his name!
[grumbling]
[screaming]
I am so very sorry!
I don't remember this painting at all or this one or this one,
or this one, or this one, or this one, or this one.
Hey, Mr. Krabs.
SpongeBob, what are you doing?
Oh, you know, just hanging around.
Boo!
Get down onto the floor, boy.
Alright, now you're just being silly.
No, no, no, no, Mr. Krabs! No!
Don't look! It's a trick!
Did you two get paint all over me first dollar?
- We're sorry, Mr. Krabs. - We're so sorry.
Preparing the Krabby Patty! At the center of every great dynasty
is the crown jewel, which keeps it alive and thriving!
For the Krusty Krab, this is the Krabby Patty.
And now you, the humble employee off the street,
the all too necessary human resource that keeps this business afloat
will learn the sacred and dark secrets of how to prepare
with your very own hands...
Oh!
the sumptuous, the lip moistening, spine tingling,
heart stopping pleasure center that is the Krabby Patty!
The light bulb! Without its warmth, Roger will die!
Roger! Without him, the light bulb will have nothing to warm!
We did it, Patrick! We saved Roger's life!
Would you like to eat here?
[laughing]
Well, okay then. What would you like?
Krabby Patty!
Mmm, yummy.
Um.
[whistling]
♪ I'm ready I'm ready to go to work ♪
♪ He's ready He's ready to go to work ♪
It's so gooey.
I can fit it in my mouth.
Oh, it tastes like licorice.
You idiots, that goo is dangerous.
Weren't you two morons listening?
No, not really. I drifted off.
But just look at all the cool stuff it can do.
You can make a hat. Or a beard.
It's okay, Patrick. I know all about secrets.
You do?
- I've got a gazillion secrets. - Like what?
Well, it's no secret that the best thing about a secret
is secretly telling someone your secret, thereby secretly adding another secret
to their secret collection of secrets secretly.
♪ The winner takes all ♪
♪ It's the thrill of one more kill ♪
♪ The last one to fall ♪
♪ Will never sacrifice their will ♪
♪ We'll never look back On the world closing in ♪
♪ Be on the attack With your wings on the wind ♪
Time for buns!
How about some tomatoes?
And I'll cut the cheese!
And, what else should we slice?
- More buns! - And lettuce!
[both] Yeah!
Phew.
Do you have references?
Wait. If that was you on the phone and you on the bus...
then who was flickering the lights?
[everyone] Nosferatu!
And now I'm gonna get rid of it once and for all.
No, Mr. Krabs! Please don't make me give up Mystery.
I know you think she's just a horse, but she's more than that, I tell you.
She listens to me.
She understands everything I say, and I understand her.
She's my best friend.
Aw, did--
Hey, who left this bowl of onions here?
Ooh, what can I do for you two nice young men?
We're selling chocolate bars. Would you like to buy one?
That sounds heavenly! I'll take one.
One chocolate bar, coming up!
Huh?
Heh.
Huh?
[laughing]
Huh? Ha.
Huh?
[mumbling]
[panting]
I know they're in here somewhere.
I don't have time for this.
I got it!
Here's his picture.
Heh heh, he doesn't look so tough.
I tattled on him, and now he wants to strangle me
with his diabolical hands! I hope they're not dirty.
[laughing]
Oh.
You dare to laugh on Halloween?!
Um... I guess so.
[laughing]
What's the matter with you?
Aren't you afraid of scary things?
Well, I was, until I found out that scary equals funny.
Can I dunk it in cocoa like my marshmallows?
[both] Huh?
Ooh, may I?
Heh heh, tough marshmallows. Could be more marshy.
[laughing]
That'll take care of it. Uh.
Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't do it!
Well, I do'ed it.
[laughing]
Let me see that roll of tape.
[taping and growling]
Man, that fur really hits the spot.
No more frozen armpits.
And this eyebrow goatee combo works like a charm.
This is the best idea we've ever had.
You said it.
I'm ready for the longest coldest winter ever.
[everyone] Bring it on!
It's got-- got to be in there somewhere! Just go to-- Just got to--
Uh.
Hey, look, it's my brain.
Hey where's it going?
Patrick!
SpongeBob!
Patrick, the frozen patties are made with sand!
SpongeBob! What?!
Patrick, the frozen Krabby Patties are made with sand!
I thought they tasted familiar!
Ow!
SpongeBob.
[grunting]
Missed you.
I missed you, too.
I got something for you, from one friend to another.
No! No, I don't want to eat another one of those things!
Now, that's a real Krabby Patty.
[meowing to tune of Happy Birthday]
What? Today? My birthday?
Oh, Gary, you know, I never pay attention
to those sorts of things.
[laughing]
[gasping]
Oh, wow, Gary. Did you make me this jellyfishing net yourself?
[meowing]
Best present ever.
[laughing]
Spatula!
Um-hmm.
Oops, forgot the cheese.
[screaming]
Patrick! Patrick, help!
And I live in the bestest place in the whole wide world, Bikini Bottom.
Where nothing bad can ever happen,
and there's nothing to ever, ever be scared of. Hmm.
[screaming]
From your biggest fan. Hmm? I have a fan?
Ah, surprise!
Ha-ha. It's Patchy the Pirate.
Ha. Happy birthday, SpongeBob.
[screaming]
[laughing]
[screaming]
Good thing we landed on SpongeBob.
Yeah, good thing.
♪ All right, you invertebrates I'm gonna teach ya how to do the sponge ♪
♪ Well, if you take your leg And stick it in the air ♪
♪ And then you take the other one And jam it right up there ♪
♪ You twist yourself around And give a great big lunge ♪
♪ Now you're doin' the sponge ♪
♪ Uh, do the sponge, sponge Uh, do the sponge ♪
♪ Bet you're buns You're doin' the sponge ♪
What if Squidward's right? What if the award is a phony?
Does this mean my whole body of work is meaningless?
Stow that kind of talk, sailor! This is war now, private!
That's exactly what he wants you to think!
This is no time to go lily-livered on us!
But, sir.
There's no room for "buts" in war, soldier! He wants you to crack!
He's trying to trick you, get inside your mind!
You must stop at nothing, and I mean nothing to defeat him!
Have I made myself clear, private?
Crystal, sir!
Could any of you show me how to tie my laces?
Could you, you, you, you, or you show me how to tie a knot?
Could you show me how to tie a simple knot?
Could you show me how to tie my shoes?
Arr, I be just a painting of a head.
Doesn't anybody know how to tie a knot?!
[laughing]
Did somebody say knot?
Okay, SpongeBob. Let's just move on to the model.
First, an artist must concentrate and visualize his concept.
Now, you've got it.
I gotta embrace the marble.
Right!
I gotta sniff the marble.
Well, uh, okay.
I gotta lick the marble.
Uh.
I gotta wash the marble. I gotta date the marble.
I gotta be the marble.
No! That cost me $24.95!
I guess it didn't know anything.
Go get that toaster.
No, not me toaster. That cost me $32.50.
$62.67.
Four... well, actually, that one was a gift.
Noo!
You haven't been helping at all with Junior!
We made a commitment, and you're not doing your share!
You never do anything!
I changed his diaper!
Yeah, once.
He's only this big.
How many diapers could he possibly use?
Hmmm?
Oh, that's not so much.
Hmmm?
So?
Hmmm?
Hmmm?!
[mumbling]
What's so great about a Jim Patty, anyway?
Meh, it's okay.
Wow!
♪ Krabby Patties They're so neat ♪
♪ La la la la la la la la la la laaaaa ♪
Really neat! Haha.
♪ Sweet to eat ♪
Treat that's neat!
[singing]
♪ Hey Dismount ♪
Hey, SpongeBob. How come he's not chasing us?
Looks like he's frozen or something.
Fruh-fruh-fro-fruh-fro.
It appears to be some sort of prison chamber...
made out of frozen tartar sauce.
This is incredible! Next to the Dirty Bubble,
the evil Man Ray is the all-time greatest arch nemesis
of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy.
Oh, what to do on this boring vacation.
Hey, I know just the thing to get the old spirits up.
I need 20 Krabby Patties, please.
Sure thing, old buddy, old Squid.
20 Krabby Patties coming--
[meowing]
[mumbling]
Dah!
SpongeBob!
I'm sorry, Squidward!
SpongeBob.
I'll just make another.
Sponge--
Hold it!
Let me just--
Hold it! Sorry, Squid--
Mmm, a Krabby Patty with blue jelly.
[gasping]
Blue jelly?!
[screaming]
Hey, ol' no name. What's happening?
[laughing]
No name, let me out!
What are ya gonna do with me?
Maybe, if we sing that song, he'll come to life.
Ready?
♪ Oh, there once was a sandman ♪
Life's as extreme as you want to make it! Whoo!
That's a nice touch. What a soothing projection screen.
That's not a projection screen!
SpongeBob, stop it right now.
Yes, ma'am.
Now that's a serious sleeper hold.
Oh, hello, Mr. Fluffy.
[mumbling]
[cooing]
[everyone] Awe.
Now, let me tell you about those fish. Boy, are they smelly. Whoo-hoo!
How could a creature who spends so much time
in the water smell so bad?
I mean, really! Soap, soap, what is soap?
[laughing]
See, Squidward, it's functional, too.
It's about as functional as your brain.
[laughing]
Thank you, Squidward.
That wasn't a compliment.
[grunting]
Of course, he actually has one.
Ow!
- Ow! - That's gonna leave a mark.
[squeaking]
Wow! Wow!
[squeaking]
As I do.
Exactly... as I do.
Exactly.
Exactly as you do.
Oh, no. I broke it.
No, no, Patrick, you did it.
I did?
[cheering]