[Music]
[Applause]
relationships are everything I believe
we are on this earth to love and connect
with one another and whether we're
conscious of it or not how and with whom
we spend our time reflects what we value
most a book or a movie coffee with a
friend or liking a status update writing
a letter or sending a text our
interactions today are done in snippets
and snaps texts and tweets shortcuts and
symbols for screens and devices our
communication is brief superficial and
distracted we're not even using full
words we're settling for mediocrity
valuing convenience / intimacy and speed
/ sentiment despite the impression that
technology makes us more connected
studies repeatedly reveal the opposite
that people today feel less connected
more isolated and alone than in any
previous generation in our need for
immediacy we are sacrificing real
connections in our impatience
handwritten notes have been forgotten
how many Jen's ears even own stamps in
fact going to the mailbox has lost its
joy filled with white envelopes of bills
coupons for car washes and coffee flyers
for driveway resealing and credit card
applications that we do not need but now
picture opening your mailbox and inside
you see a bright blue envelope can you
feel your heart race with love and your
cheek stretching to a smile if you feel
that thrill of wondering who it's from
or of recognizing familiar handwriting
maybe you open it right away
maybe you save it for last savoring the
anticipation all right now go ahead look
at the return address feel your heart
fill with love slide your finger under
the blue flap
and pull out the note read the words
that were meant just for you receiving a
note means not only that someone thought
of you but that they took the time to
share something from their heart to
yours they signed it and sealed it and
stamped it and addressed it and got it
to a mailbox and in today's digital
instantaneous world that is a solid show
of commitment because it's become so
easy to reach out via email or social
media but it's not enough to heart
something its ordinary and overused it
doesn't let someone know what they mean
to you doesn't repair divides or heal
hurts a letter coming through a screen
is missing something there's an inherent
disconnect between the sender and the
receiver it's missing that special
personal raw connecting power when I was
12 I paid a dollar to get a French pen
pal I still remember the address by
heart
nine rue de super oil in Bordeaux France
my pen pal Benedict wrote to me in
English and I wrote to her in French we
swapped maps of our towns and pictures
of our families writing off her high
school and college but never meeting
until seven years after our first
letters were exchanged when I flew to
France to spend the month of July with
her family since then we've shared many
special times together she spent a
summer with our family I was the maid of
honor in her wedding our kids and our
parents have met and just so about a
year ago my husband and I flew to France
to surprise her for her birthday
coincidentally today is her birthday so
a year ago on a random Thursday night
with the help of her family she came
home from work to find us sitting in her
kitchen
we're like sisters ours is one of my
most cherished relationships and it all
began with letters
as the years passed technology advanced
we to switch to texts and social media
for sheree family news and quick lows
and happy birthdays but the truth is
that this precious relationship would
not have been so without the foundation
of decades of handwritten letters and I
know this is true because our sons who
have the best time I can't stop laughing
when they're together they don't stay
connected on snapchat or the video games
they're both on and my daughter and
Benny's niece they tried to have a
little connection on snapchat but it
fizzles never going beyond the
superficial with the countless apps and
platforms for communicating digitally
handwritten notes are endangered
precariously near extinction the US
Postal Service reports that
correspondence mail is fading as a form
of personal communication in 2018 the
average u.s. household received one
piece of personal mail only once every
10 weeks two and a half months and
that's down from once every two weeks in
1987 handwritten notes are rare but like
so many rare things they hold great
value and worth they're more meaningful
and treasured than a text or an email
you get a suite text how do you save it
with a screenshot save to your camera
roll with fourteen thousand eight
hundred and ninety-two other photos that
you hardly ever look out does it ever
become tangible when's the last time you
pinned an email to your refrigerator or
thumb through a box of really special
texts a kiss blowing emoji does not feel
the same and does not mean the same as a
note that says I miss you and I want to
be near enough to give you a kiss a
screenshot is not like no paper that
lets you hold and touch and fold the
same paper that the writer held and
touched and folded with every stroke of
their pen something of the writer is
passed along their style their
personality their energy
a little piece of them is shared with
you and you can keep letters for longer
than a lifetime rereading them reliving
their memories anytime letters capture
history in the culture of a time they
create a time capsule right here a
letter is one of the most genuine and
generous ways you can let someone know
they matter a handwritten note says I
care so much about you that I took the
time to write down my thoughts and
feelings so that you can physically hold
them and the KY note is inexpensive but
can be the most memorable gift more
valuable than an expensive purchase
because a note is the gift of your time
in a few minutes I'm gonna share with
you some practical tips but think now of
the surprise will create for someone
when they get your note picture your
grandmother's space your brother's smile
your friends hand on her heart because
she's so touched and letter writing has
many benefits for the writer - helps us
to be mindful it's really hard to
multitask when you're writing a letter
and there's the sense of not easily
being able to change or erase something
we write so we pay attention to what we
want to convey it's meditative it's time
to slow down pause and reflect and by
slowing down it allows us to consider
what matters on paper you're less likely
to complain about the weather or your
roommates music or how badly you slept
last night instead it helps us to be
authentic and honest and vulnerable
which isn't always easy but it is always
important in nurturing relationships and
writing a letter is like spending a
little bit of time with that person no
matter how far away they are and by when
we feel connected it lifts us up studies
show that writing by hand gives us lower
stress cognitive improvements a better
outlook a more positive mood
more gratitude sharper memory and a
better overall sense of well-being
righty my hand adds balance to our
keyboard dominated lives and like
colouring it reduces anxiety and brings
a sense of calm besides all these
awesome benefits it's just plain classy
and at its heart letter-writing is
sentimental and nostalgic and tied to
tradition and history of staying
connected to loved ones through times of
war in long separations so let me make
it easier for you to join in the power
of letter-writing with a few practical
tips first pick out a note card or a box
of cards that makes you happy
find something that reflects your style
or that reminds you of the person you're
gonna send it to and then you'll pick
out stamps the postcard has many great
designs but you don't even need to go to
the post office you can go to the
grocery store the drugstore the card
store there is probably somewhere you go
on a regular basis that sells stamps and
please don't buy just one buy a whole
sheet keep them with your note cards
start collecting actual mailing
addresses put them into your phone in
your contacts where they're readily
accessible you may want to keep a
running list of people who you'd like to
read a note to or perhaps you want to
pick a day every January 1st the 3rd of
every month or every Sunday when you're
gonna sit down and write a note or two
nearly a year ago one of my dear friends
lost her son at the funeral
the pastor invited everyone there to
send a letter to the family on their own
birthday and the result was a year of
notes filled with stories and memories
of their son helping to hold them up and
remind them of just how very many lives
he had touched that's the power of a
letter and it doesn't need to be long or
fancy to be meaningful it just needs to
be from your heart
so if you don't already have somebody in
mind who could you write to and what
would you say well right to express
gratitude to acknowledge someone's
influence and impact in your life right
to Kindle romance or to build lasting
connections maybe there's something that
would be hard for you to say in person
but that you really want to share avoid
regret and write it in a note maybe you
could write to your mom when you go back
from college after a break go back to
college after a break leave behind a
thank-you note or write her a note after
you've been up all night with your
screaming infant write to your coworker
who deserves recognition or your
children
how would your teenager feel to receive
a note from you telling them that you're
proud what would it mean to your spouse
or partner to get a note from you that
didn't list groceries or to dues write
to your friend who you haven't talked to
in a while who lives across the country
or across town or across the street and
what about our friends who are
struggling through divorce cancer loss
of a parent or child write to them to
help them to encourage them through
life's tough times right to let them
know they're loved and thought of and
that in some small way you are
supporting them in their difficulties
letters have the strength and power to
heal and build relationships in a way
that's more meaningful than anything
with a keyboard or a screen so now
together let's make a difference if you
read even only one note a year I
challenge you to handwrite and mail one
today I have no cards for everyone here
to choose from so get ready to take out
a pen and write a note to someone you
care about to dare to connect in a
timeless powerful way and to start a
positive ripple effect in your world
change your relationships with a pen and
a stand
and one handwritten note at a time thank
you
[Applause]