Behaviors That Scream Unintelligence [0:00:00]
Non-stupid people always underestimate the damaging power of stupid individuals.
In particular, non-stupid people constantly forget that at all times and places and under
any circumstances to deal and/or associate with stupid people always turns out to be
a costly mistake.
Carlo Cipolla.
Now, I have to admit, I initially started making this video because of a threat I saw
over on Reddit about signals to spot unintelligent people.
And, I just thought it was interesting kind of thing, I’m like, yeah, this will be a
fun video.
And, I kept going through doing research and when I found Carlo Cipolla and he’s an economic
historian over at Stanford with Fulbright Scholar.
He passed away about twenty years ago.
When I found his research, all of a sudden, I realized how important this topic is.
Now, here at Real Men Real Style, yes, I talk about image and presentation and clothing,
but we also talk about behavior, we also talk about men becoming their best selves.
And part of that is surrounding yourself with great men.
I would say you become the average of the men you surround yourself with.
Well, this was interesting because the more I read into this, the more I realized how
damaging it can be if you’ve got somebody in your circle, well, let’s just say that
is stupid.
And, let’s be clear, I’m not defining stupid as somebody that doesn’t get good
grades, doesn’t have a high IQ, somebody that may have a learning disability, because
all of those people can be very intelligent in different ways.
There’s emotional intelligence.
I mean, you could say that someone that’s really good at basketball or hockey has, you
know, a sports intelligence that’s well beyond mine.
My daughters are great ice skaters and when it comes to their intelligence, their bodies’
ability, yeah, there, they kick my butt.
And it’s like can you judge a fish on its ability to judge a tree?
I get that.
But, the way Carlo defined it and I thought it was really interesting, he defines stupid
as somebody that was damaging, somebody that would hurt all the individuals around them.
And they got no benefit from having that person and that person had no benefit in of being
around those people.
This was just somebody that was damaging in almost all respects.
And I’m not going to go too deep on the subject.
If you want more, go read his book.
I will actually link to it down in the description of today’s video.
But, he described people as five types.
You’ve got intelligent people, you’ve got helpless people, you have bandits, you
have ineffectual people who are kind of like right there on the center, and then you have
stupid people.
And, again, for this definition, stupid people create losses not only in of themselves, but
losses in others.
So, let’s start this off for the big one.
And, whenever this one happens if I’m talking with someone and I spot this, I try to get
away very quickly, because I realize I’m probably speaking to a moron.
And that is they cannot distinguish facts from opinion.
And there is a big difference.
You may have a strongly held opinion, you may believe it with all your heart, but that
does that not make it right.
And that does not mean that you should take your opinion and try to press it on to me.
This is a human tendency that we see when somebody believes something so much, they
start to confuse that line between what is true, what is a fact, what is indisputable
versus what is their opinion.
For me, gravity, that is something that’s pretty much, you know, I’m going to say
this is a law.
And that’s why I appreciate having a science background as you see, okay, I can test this
and we have not had really many, you know, instances where you can disprove this.
But then, there are other things, there are beliefs that we have – and I’m not going
to get into details because I don’t want to offend a bunch of you guys.
But, I will say and you guys could get down in the comments and talk about this.
I will say if you do not have facts to back up what you’re talking about, if you cannot
– if you cannot prove it, then most likely it’s an opinion, not a fact.
Now, this next one can almost be set as a question you could ask somebody and that is
what was a strongly held opinion that you have now changed your mind on?
And if you can’t change your mind, if you are so stuck on certain beliefs, then to me
this is a big red flag, that you’re not open to new information, which could des – basically
point you to a new north.
And this is tough.
I think Mark Twain said it best, it’s not what we know that’s dangerous, it’s what
we think we know that just ain’t so that gets us.
And I’ve seen this happen to so many people that they firmly believe, they think that
they’ve got their base down.
And whenever this is dislodged, whenever it’s broken up, this person oftentimes can be rudderless
in a storm and they can really have a crisis in their life.
I try to approach things as a skeptic and I do want to be able to see and to understand
and to be able to make my own decision.
I believe that it is, you know, our own ability to make up our own minds.
It’s really the only true freedom that we have in this life and it should be something,
where, yes, I understand you have very strong belief usually about religion, usually about
the way people should live their lives, the way you should raise kids.
I know my wife and I, this is probably where we had our biggest disagreements on how to
raise the children.
But, we were able to talk this out.
[0:04:56] I actually I changed, I was – I was a person
that believed in spanking to give you an example.
I grew up getting spanked.
Corporal punishment was in my school.
But, having talked with my wife and doing research on this, I realized, you know what?
Okay, I need to give it – and I’ve never hit my kids and I’m very proud of that.
But, I do know that oftentimes we are a product of where we come from and it was a big thing
to change my mind on that and I’m proud that I did.
That being said, I think that any man should have an open mind and actually, I think it
strengthens your own beliefs when they are challenged and they’re able to withstand
that challenge.
Now, are there any classic rock and roll fans out there?
If you are, make sure to smash that like button.
And if you don’t, if you like more synth-pop, sure, click on that, I like that stuff too.
Point being is the band, Kansas, they had a great song, Carry on my Wayward Son.
And you’ve probably heard the lyrics, you probably know the words.
But, there was one particular set in the lyrics that goes like this, “And if I claim to
be a wise man, well, it surely means that I don’t know.”
Now, those are some wise words and it makes sense because those go even further back.
Basically, that’s a paraphrase from Socrates when he talks about, you know, I know that
I know nothing.
That was his big thing why the Oracle of Delphi defined basically said Socrates was the smartest
man on the world because he understood what – that he did not know things.
And, anyone that studied philosophy, logic, thought, realizes that as you learn more about
the world, as you get smarter, you get stupider.
What’s going on here?
Because imagine that your bit of knowledge is like an island.
And as that island grows, so does its shoreline.
And the shoreline is all the information you do not know and you realize as the island
gets bigger, the shoreline just keeps getting bigger proportionally and you realize, gosh,
I know less and less.
And that’s why, you know, usually 16-year old, 17-year old you, you knew everything
and by the time, you know, you’re – you’re 67, you realized you know almost nothing and
you’re probably happier for that because it’s easier to go through life realizing
that there are just many things that you do not know that are out of your control.
Now, this one, I’m just throwing in, but anybody that tries to step on to an elevator
or a train before people have the chance to get off.
I mean, yeah, you are an idiot.
No, actually I think and I’ve been this person because I didn’t grow up around elevators
or trains.
So, the first time, you feel kind of stupid and you realize you’re in somebody’s face
and you pick up that pretty quickly.
But, to me, this is about self-awareness and observing what other people do and realizing
that there’s a reason why they’re not running up to jump into the train because
there’s all these other people have to get off.
And I know some of you guys are saying, “Hey, this doesn’t work.
The buses are so crowded in my area.
I’ve got to get a running start and jump in as soon as that door opens if I want to
hope to get a seat.”
I remember this happening back in Ukraine.
My wife is from Kiev and I was just amazed at how they would cram in.
I was just like, yeah, I’m not doing that.
I was just walking.
This is by the way, pre-COVID.
I think a lot more people are probably walking now.
Now, this next one is hitting on something we talked about the very beginning of this
video and that is they look down on people, who they view as inferior.
What they perceive to be intelligence, they look down on that.
And to me, this is a misunderstanding of the way human beings are and that we can have
various types of intelligence.
Again, just because somebody does not may be have table manners, does not dress properly
– and we talk about style here on this channel, but I really don’t care how people dress.
This is about actually controlling the frame with other people, because they are not going
to afford me the luxury that I try to afford others, which is I really try hard not to
judge.
That being said, I do, I’m a human just like anybody else, but I realize most people
don’t have my understanding of style and image and presentation and I can use that
to my advantage because it gives me a leg up.
So, when you understand that tons of people out there may be do not understand advanced
mathematics, they don’t have a degree from a fancy school, but they’re pretty darn
good at building a house, they are pretty darn good at fixing plumbing.
These guys that work in these blue collar jobs, they have amazing intelligence.
Just in a way different oftentimes than maybe yours or what you – what society deems to
be super intelligent, yet, we would not be able to have the type of lifestyles if we
didn’t have men out there building in the construction fields, who knew how to mix certain
types of cement and how different types of steel work.
I mean, that kind of stuff is an amazing level
of intelligence.
Now, this one is a red flag and I know this because I used to do it.
And that is you would brag about doing things that are incredibly stupid thinking it makes
you look like you got big balls, that you are the top dog.
I mean, I love motorcycles and I brag about, oh, yeah, I took that thing 180 miles an hour.
Have you seen what happens to somebody if they have a wreck and oftentimes not even
their own fault, they just simply lose control, something’s on the road that they didn’t
spot?
Yeah.
If you lose control at 180 miles an hour, you know, type in Turkish motor style – cycle
accident.
I’m sorry, some of you guys this is not the best stuff to go check out, but I will
– I’m saying it because I care about cyclist.
[0:10:04] I was a rider, but I stopped riding when I
realized I was just being stupid.
I had too much to lose, I’ve got five kids.
And, even wearing a helmet and all the gear, yeah, you are just not going to survive that.
So, point being is anyone that’s bragging about doing stupid stuff, yeah, you probably
need to pull them to the side and say, “Hey, man, like I just want to point out like that
is stupid.
You should have not been going, you know, 150 miles down the highway with your pregnant
girlfriend sitting in next to you.”
Next up, anyone that views regular trips to the casino or buying a lottery tickets as
an investment strategy.
No, it’s not.
That is pure chance.
And I wish you all the best luck, but you are going to lose.
The next signal of low intelligence and one I try to stay away from when I see this in
people is they are just parroting back to me what they have heard on whether it’d
be Fox News, whether it’d be CNN, whatever side you’re on, you’re just simply telling
me what you heard and you can’t go any deeper.
And you can really quickly spot these people when you ask them to explain a little bit
more detail because they can’t.
And maybe they can go down one layer, but can they go down three layers?
They haven’t really thought through the points that they’re going into.
They heard something, it sounds good and they’re just repeating it back.
Again, a bird can do this.
Does this mean you’re an intelligent human being?
Probably not and if you are easily dissuade if you’re easily this convinced, I have
to worry like if I have you in my circle, what are the – what kind of damage could
you do to me and to my friends.
Next up, trying to use an anecdote as proof.
And this is a simple story, this is something that’s maybe happened to them and they use
this example as if this proves their point.
Now, one thing that I encourage anyone to take is statistics.
Go read a book on statistics, you understand that usually you need a large enough sample
size to be able to – and you never truly prove anything.
You just have – we have a good indicator that this is the right way to go.
You can only prove something is false, you could never truly prove something is true.
And that’s what’s interesting about, you know, stats and numbers and you need a lot
of data points, usually about a thousand data points for it to be statistically significant.
One story one example one thing that happened to you years ago that you have latched onto
and you have, you know, that end though does not prove your point.
And anyone that tries to do this and really is smug and is like, yeah, now, you got to
believe me, you know probably, yeah, just doesn’t understand how things work.
Next up, mouth breathers, watch out for those people.
No, I saw this as a comment on Reddit, I just thought it was hilarious.
But, seriously, you do not want in general just breathe through your mouth.
And the reason being is it can actually long term affect the shape of your face and make
a man look weaker.
Basically, recesses the chin, not a great thing.
But, I will say as well it’s just also you don’t get as clean air.
You need to use your nose, it actually filters the air.
But, that one was just funny, I just had to include it.
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Next up, anyone that thinks that they can win an argument by just being louder than
the other person.
Just because you can out scream because you can talk in a louder voice, because you can
overpower, because they are nice and they do not want to interrupt you and you can keep
talking for 10 to 15 minutes.
This does not mean that you are smart or you have won the argument.
You also got that other type of guy that always has to have the last word.
You have refuted his points and he just comes back with a quit – quick little bit of what
he perceives to be his wit.
He may be tries to find one hole in your argument, but he can’t really deal with the other
99%.
Understand that, yes, -- and, again, this whole video is about you realizing that stupid
is as stupid does as Forest Gump said.
You can’t do anything about some of these people.
You just need to step out and you need to get them out of your circle and you need to
be careful of how much damage a stupid person can do to what it is you want to achieve in
life.
In fact, getting back to Carlo’s book about The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity, his fourth
law clearly states that non-stupid people always underestimate the damaging power of
stupid individuals.
And his fifth law is that stupid people are the most dangerous type of people out there.
Now, do I a hundred percent agree with Cipolla’s laws here?
No, not exactly.
But, I really like it because it was a unique approach and it really did talk about how,
again, when you allow dangerously stupid people into your circle into your life, they can
be very damaging.
And it is something you want to watch out for.
You want to make sure as well that you’re not giving off these signs because people
are making choices and you want to make sure that you are aware of these biases of these
human tendencies and that you are working to combat them and do what you can.
Unless, I guess you’re just one of those guys that, yeah, just doesn’t care.
[0:15:15] The next red flag is somebody that can’t
learn from their own mistake.
So, you probably heard the saying, “A smart person learns from their mistakes.
A wise person, learns from the mistakes of others and a stupid person learns from nothing.”
Now, this one’s tough because I think that all of us have weaknesses.
And many of us have weaknesses with relationships, we keep wanting to take back the same person
again and again and we know they’re going to cheat on us.
We know that they are going to do us wrong, but we just can’t – we just feel we have
to take them back.
Guys, take solace in knowing that you’re not alone.
There are many people that have throughout history very smart people in certain respects.
And that’s what’s interesting about this is that I think that there are some people
that are not, they’re just not intelligent in certain areas of their life.
But, yeah, you want to try to learn from the mistakes.
One quote that really helps me is when somebody shows you who they are, believe them.
Because oftentimes we just want to believe that this person is going to change, that
they are going to be good.
If they’ve shown you multiple times that they are not that good person, that they will
do this, then believe them.
Take their word, take their actions for what it is.
So, what video to watch next?
How about at a bare minimum every guy needs to know this bit of information?
I’ve got certain skills, certain things I think every guy needs to know.
What are they?
Find out, gents, in this video, boom, right here.
Click on it, you’ll magically go over.
It’s a good one.
Enjoy.
[0:16:38] End of audio