(triumphant music)
- [Announcer] Shut up!
- Okay, Larry.
Today's the day.
No more lurking in the shadows.
You've been a part of the streaming community for years.
Just introduce yourself.
It's not hard.
Okay, here we go.
Hi, I'm Larry.
I'm a big fan of this stream
and I just want to take the time to introduce myself.
I'm very shy.
And to be honest, it's taken me three weeks to
even draft this message, but I'm sure
there's other shy people in this chat.
So if you're awkward
like me, Hey, let's be friends.
- Ain't that right TPU nation.
Let's go
- Dammit
- Let's go
- Alright.
Back to the shadows I go.
- Hey, what's up Steve 49. Good to see you again.
- [Announcer] Every Twitch stream ever.
- What's up guys.
So for today's ASMR video
I have discovered the most incredible soothing sound.
If I move this brush perfectly across my face
it will create the most soothing sound I've ever heard
in my life.
(groaning)
- Goosebumps
(groaning)
- [Announcer] Is this all live right now?
- Alright. Alright. Alright.
Ooh, another victory royale. Holy crap.
This has happened 900 times, but I'm going to pretend
like this is the most amazing thing ever.
Oh shoot. Alright.
Anyway, guys, uh, that does it for my stream,
but if y'all want to stick around
we're going to raid my boy Painter Kid.
So when we're gonna send the
whole fricking audience over there right now
so stick on there I'm gonna press this button.
we're all going to go to their stream.
(happy music)
- You said no one was going to see this.
Oh my God. There's so many people.
Oh they're seeing my body.
- Well they're right. The chameleon does represent a penis.
- What?
- The chameleon represents a penis.
- I didn't say anything in relation to that.
- That's what the chats saying, did you see that?
- Oh God.
They're saying stuff about penis they said about my penis.
- Well, the chameleons a part of you now. So yes.
- Oh.
- [ Announcer] Huh, Pawgers.
- Oh man, wow. I'm having a really nice time.
Thanks for taking me out.
- Of course, I'm having a great time too.
Did you still want to get ice cream after this?
- Yeah, I do.
But we could grab ice cream at my place.
- Oh.
You're bad.
- I know, I'm so naughty.
- Oh, scratch that. I gotta go.
- Oh, is everything okay?
- No, no. Somebody new started playing League
so I have to be a dick to them in chat.
Look here you little piece of shit.
You're a newbie.
Then you stick to the top lane, you fricking idiot.
I'll bash your teeth in you piece of crap.
- That's hot.
- [Announcer] What game are they playing?
- It says it in the description.
- Oh, man. I hate this level.
I always die immediately in the wrecking ball.
Hey, I know I lagged, thanks for letting me know.
Hey, to the 216th person who typed lag,
I mean, I didn't see it the first 215 times
but the 216th person, hey, you really helped me out there.
Helped me out there.
If you guys actually think that's helpful
then you can just go, fuck.
- [Announcer] I'm gonna need some Fs in the chat.
- Okay. I am bored.
- Me too.
Oh, you know what we could do?
We could watch Ninja.
- Oh, he's streaming right now.
I haven't watched Twitch streams in forever
because I just get way too annoyed
- At what?
- I always feel like a mid roll ad plays right
as something cool is about hap-
♪ Merry merchmas ♪
♪ Happy merchukkah ♪
♪ Look there's merch in the store ♪
- [Announcer] You're playing the game wrong.
Let me tell you how to do it.
- Okay Larry. Here's how you get people to notice you.
You just make a huge donation.
Then Teefy will be so shocked and grateful.
He'll shout you out on the stream
and then everyone's gonna be like, wow, who's this guy
you know, it's great. It's gonna work.
- Hey, thanks for the donation, Larry 18.
Oh, and a huge thank you to Fit Carl 90
for a first time donation of $1, every cent counts.
Y'all so I always appreciate it. Let's go.
- Notice me.
- [Announcer] Ah, poopimo.
- Oh, hello there.
Since this video is called every Twitch stream ever
and we just started our own Twitch channel.
Oh dang it I died uh, twitch.tv/moshgames.
Dang. I, died again
we thought, you know, we should
make some jokes about ourselves, you know,
ah shoot, I died again.
But then we were thinking about it and we're like, well
what can we even make fun of?
Like, I don't know that we push our merch too hard,
oh dang it I died again,
But like, we don't even push our merch that hard.
- Woo hoo, woo hoo hoo
- So yeah.
There's just nothing really to
to, you know, make a joke about.
Ah fuck, I died again.
- You said your streams only got one viewer,
and it was your mom.
- If EFUs gotta aim bot to keep up with me,
then that's a compliment to me.
Crazy quirky.
- Like a mid roll ad always plays right as something cool
is about to happen.
- Oh yeah, all the
(laughing)
- I'm the couch, I'm the couch ruiner
- Get out