- There's one simple thing that if you do
will make your energy more irresistible than ever before.
It will get people to literally see your own value.
And I'm gonna show you exactly what that is,
how to wire it in, and why this is so incredibly magnetic.
Now, the first thing to realize
that when it comes to commitment
and when it comes to the energy you're putting out
is that the energy you feel inside of your body,
you are putting out,
and other people are responding
to the energy you are feeling
and to the energy you are embodying.
Now, a lot of times what happens
is when people are looking
for someone else to commit to them,
what they are doing is they are seeking
something outside of them
and they're wanting it to be a specific way.
They're wanting it to appear a specific way.
And because of that, they're feeling the resistance.
And the wondering is if this person gonna come around.
It's an energetic feeling of feeling not enough,
of feeling resistance.
And because of that,
it's literally prolonging that other person
from actually committing.
Now, there's two sides of this though.
On one hand, it could be a simple, energetic shift,
and that's what we're gonna talk about in this video.
On the other hand,
it may be that you have attracted somebody
that is emotionally unavailable
or isn't, maybe, won't come around in that way.
So it's not like, we just need to make this internal shift
and guaranteed they're gonna come around.
You may need to decide and discern
with whether this person is gonna meet you
with where you currently are
and whether they're even making the energetic effort
to actually do this.
Now I'll be vulnerable with you all here
and say that even in my own relationship,
there are blocks that I believe I may have
that may have also come from either past relationships
and even seen my dad go through
what he went through growing up
or seen what my dad went through.
When I was growing up, I saw that.
And I think there's, in some ways, things that have held,
fear that has held me back from committing
and it's been something that I had to actually work on
and even to this day, I'm still working on:
being able to open up my heart,
being able to actually commit in my relationship.
And I can clearly see that there's certain blocks
that have come up that were placed there
or that were there because of past meaning I gave
to either relationships in the past
or what I saw my dad go through.
So for example, let me explain how this may work
and how this may help you understand more
where this person might be coming from
from a little bit of experience here.
So when it comes to the commitment,
my dad growing up and my mom growing up,
they divorced when I was five.
And then after that, I saw my dad two years later,
get in a relationship with my ex-stepmom .
So from seven to 15-years old,
I've the ex-stepmom in my life
who was very emotionally, physically abusive.
And from that, even that divorce when I was 15,
all of a sudden I had all this freedom
and like this was a whole new reality, really.
And after that, though, my dad went through
like a 10-year divorce process
with my ex-stepmom who's a narcissist.
And I've seen my dad's life been made a living hell.
So I can see that, in some ways, I may have a belief system
that says that to be in relationship equals pain.
To commit to somebody equals pain.
Because also I can tell that my dad, my ex-stepmom,
she lied about how much money she made,
owned like a business that was making like a lot of money,
like 500K plus a year,
claims she was making no money
because she didn't pay herself anything.
And therefore, my dad
who's a fire investigator had to pay her
like a lot more money than he should have
in order to compensate for that.
And it was something that I believe
I can still, again, say, "Oh, that's not fair.
I don't wanna put myself in that position."
So in many ways, the difference though
that what I want to describe to what I'm doing
is I acknowledge that there's levels
of blockage that I have around commitment,
but at the same time, I am doing my best
to open up more and to look at these beliefs
and to look at these stories and to let them go
so that I can open up more and more in my relationship.
Now, the other side of this as well,
so now you kind of see it from that side.
The other side of this as well that I'll share with you
that I believe would be very powerful
when it comes to commitment and all of this in general
is sometimes what we believe
is that we must control the situation.
We must do more in order to actually get this person
to come around.
But what that ends up doing
is that pressure then creates more of a block
and creates more resistance.
One of the best things you can do
is to actually let go of the pressure,
actually let go of the attachment
to whether this person is gonna come around or not.
But what you can do is put yourself out there.
Be vulnerable.
You can even say something like,
"Hey, my needs aren't being met.
I would like to know,
is this something that is serious for you?"
You can share that instead of wondering,
is this person ever gonna commit?
You can voice that.
And here's the thing.
If you do get rejected or you do,
I mean, rejected by the way,
is something you that you would choose
if you define it as rejection.
You may be dating somebody
and you're wondering if they commit or not,
and if they don't, realize it's okay.
I can tell in past relationships
that I would like be worried
that someone wasn't gonna choose me.
And I would overcompensate
and people please and try to fix and do all of these things
because I was trying to avoid being rejected.
And what I eventually learned
is that it took courage for me to be vulnerable.
But as I started being vulnerable
and I pulled my energy back,
that's when everything started to align for me.
So one of the biggest things I can tell you
when you're wondering this is to pull your energy back.
Pull your energy back and take the focus off of them
and put it more so within your body.
Put it more so within yourself.
Because I think sometimes maybe resisting somebody else
actually coming around
if we have a story also that says they're not coming around.
They're not seeing my value.
They're not seeing my sense of self-worth.
And remember, this is at many levels an energetic game.
Doesn't mean everyone else is gonna conform
as you change your energy.
But as you realize you're more
and more your sense of self-worth,
you can then decide, is this person putting in the effort?
Will they ever commit?
You could start to look at this
and you could start to be honest with yourself.
So at a certain level,
it is an energetic game where the intention
is to let go of the attachment and to pull your energy back
to be in your own frame and to really decide what do I want?
And can I also, in many ways, let go of the shame
and the abandonment wound that may be there.
I think a lot of times
we may have an abandonment wound or a shame.
Shame says, "I'm broken. There's something wrong with me."
This may have been wired in as kids.
And there may have also been a story or a belief
that like, people don't commit to me.
People don't choose me.
People don't come around.
People don't even stick around.
And if that shame and that belief is there,
no matter what you do on the inside
or what you try to change on the outside,
not a lot changes until you become aware
of this outdated story and outdated belief.
I will tell you that I used to have a huge block
when it came to dating and relationships
and it was specifically because I had a lot of shame
and belief that I was broken.
I didn't think people would really like me.
And from the outside, looking in,
I had friends that were like,
"Dude, what the hell are you talking about?"
'Cause on the outside looking in, they could see,
"Oh, you have all this success, all this notoriety,
all this YouTube videos, all these views,
all this significance and all this shit.
Why would you have a problem?"
Which honestly made it then feel even more worse.
Not that that was their intention.
But it was literally
because no matter what I had on the outside,
and maybe at certain levels, I attracted all these things
and I was like, "Oh, I'm gonna become successful
and get this YouTube plaque button.
I'm gonna be so special."
Maybe part of that was to compensate
for not feeling whole and complete already.
Maybe in relationships like trying to fix somebody
or trying to help and doing all of these things
that like drop polarity on the relationship,
maybe all of those things actually did more harm than good.
So the thing to realize with this
is that less is actually more.
Instead of trying to do things on the outside to change it,
become aware of the belief
that there's something wrong with me,
that people don't stick around, that people don't commit.
And you might even realize that some of those stories came
from when you were very young,
wondering why your dad or mom
maybe didn't commit to each other.
A lot of the stuff we have, the stories we have,
are on autopilot from what we witnessed growing up.
Did your dad or mom truly commit to each other?
Did they cheat on each other?
Because if so, there may be a belief there
that's on autopilot that says, "Wow, people don't commit.
People don't stick around. People leave me."
And remember beliefs create our reality.
Whatever we believe to be true is reflected back to us.
So this isn't really like one thing you do
that makes them commit,
the one thing over here if you just smile a little bit more.
The thing that our highly recommend you look at with this
is what do you believe to be true about relationships?
What do you believe to be true about love?
What do you believe to be true about what you deserve?
Because these beliefs are on an autopilot from childhood
until you become aware of it.
And when you become aware of it,
that's when things can actually shift.
Awareness is 90% of transformation.
That's it, becoming aware of these stories, these beliefs
and then you could realize they're just stories.
They're just beliefs.
You don't have to keep feeding them.
That was as simple as it was for me like a year or two ago
when I realized this and everything changed.
I add more magnetic energy. I felt more free.
I was way less attached.
I started to feel more secure
instead of anxious in love.
And it changed everything.
And the reason it changed is because I started to see
that, wow, this isn't even my stuff.
A lot of this is either my mom or my dad's stuff.
I was able to see that some of it was my being the nice guy,
which is something I had to shed.
Something my dad lived in the pattern of
and his dad lived in the pattern of.
The way that I shed it was by becoming aware of it
and then making the choice to be vulnerable.
And when we start making the choice
to like fill up our own cup
and to be the most authentic version of ourselves
and to realizing that we don't need anyone else
to act a certain way for us to feel good or validated,
that's when everything really begins to change.
So this changes so much as we begin to embody the energy
and realize what are the stories that are on autopilot?
Because when you let go of those stories,
your whole entire life will begin to change.
A lot of the neediness we may feel,
which is the biggest block
to attracting love or getting someone to commit, by the way,
the neediness is an attachment
to someone else's emotions or energy
to try to get our own internal needs met
because we didn't feel like they were met when we were kids.
So when we're kids, we felt like our needs weren't met.
So then we say, "Oh, we attract also people normally
that don't meet our needs
because that feels familiar and normal to us,
but then we look for them to do so
and we demand that they do."
And really you think it's about this other person,
but it's in a weird subconscious way,
you're demanding that mom and dad meet your needs
because that's the way
that you were modeled love growing up.
So realizing and recognizing
that mom and dad didn't meet your needs
because you weren't good enough,
mom and dad didn't meet your needs
because they didn't maybe know how to meet your needs,
because maybe their needs weren't meant growing up
and it's just a pattern that they're passing down
out of not being aware.
You see, so really this is just a familiar pattern
that's been passed down.
You can look at this though.
You can realize that a lot of this might not be yours.
It might be handing down beliefs down the generational path.
And then what you could do
is start to be more so in your own power.
And you'll realize the more you let go,
the more you are actually able to receive.
Now, one thing I'm doing
is if you want to ask me any question you want,
I'm gonna be responding to questions that I get via text.
So text me at 424-304-0104
or you just click the link below.
And then also there's a video right here
for why letting go is the key to receiving.
It's one of my most powerful videos.
Check it out right here.
The degree to which you can let go
of trying to control outcome,
the degree to which you can let go
is the degree to which you will receive.
And a big part of this is letting go of desire.