-We both started in stand-up.
And I heard something about you.
You said that -- Was Chris Rock one of your --
-Yes.
-Did you listen to him before?
-I used to -- To pump myself up,
I used to watch "Bring the Pain" on HBO.
I used to -- Before I started doing the open mikes,
just to get, like, geeked and get amped for it.
And then I noticed that I started taking on his cadence.
And I had to stop because it looked like
I was biting his style.
-Yeah, exactly. [ Laughter ]
I mean, you watch a comedian
and then go out and do your own stuff,
it's like you're just sounding like Chris. Yes.
Has Chris ever seen you?
-I don't think so, no.
-Oh, no, really? -No.
-Just amazing. He's the best.
Do you have a memorable -- Do you have a memorable gig
that's something like --
'Cause I -- I remember, like, I had just crazy gigs.
I've done stand-up with no microphone.
-Yes.
-Where I'm like, "You forgot the mike?"
-Yeah, nothing makes me -- Now at least you're used to the lab.
I was never used to the lab
when they had to give us the mikes that are on here.
-Oh, yeah.
-But I've had some crazy -- I've had some crazy gigs.
But there was nothing crazier than --
So, a couple that was a friend of mine,
they were having trouble conceiving.
And so they had had some issues.
And so they finally decided they were getting a surrogate.
And the husband had been doing a lot of research.
He loved his wife.
And he was like -- He's going to make this happen for her.
One of the things he learned was that if you --
if the woman is laughing during insemination --
-Oh, no, no, no. [ Laughter ]
No, no, no, no, no, Retta, no, no.
Please -- Maybe the story might change.
Wait. What's happening?
The likelihood of conception... [ Laughter ]
...goes up.
So I get this e-mail -- And at the time we weren't that close.
And I get this e-mail and he says --
He sends me the articles, the links to all these articles
that tell you what works and what's helpful.
And he's like, "So do you think you could do stand-up
at our insemination?" [ Laughter ]
-That's what I was hoping you wouldn't say.
Oh, my gosh. And you said yes?
-No, at first I said, "Yo, what's up?"
[ Laughter ]
-That's a good response.
-I was like, "For realsies?"
And he was like, "Yeah, I understand."
He's like, "I mean --" His wife was so sweet.
And I loved her so much.
I was like, "Well, I'll do it if Dana does it."
It was another friend of mine who does stand-up.
And I was basically like, "Dana is not going to do it."
And so I was like, "I'll do it if Dana does it."
And Dana was like, "Bitch, did you really just put me
in that position?"
So she said she would do it.
-Wait, so you got an opener as well?
[ Laughter ] -No, I was like --
I was like, "I'm opening. You're closing."
-Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Yeah.
That's a good friend right there. Yeah, exactly.
Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Dana. Yeah.
-So he set up this whole thing. -Where were you?
-We were -- It was in Beverly Hills.
It was a clinic -- one of the high-tech, expensive-ass places.
-So you're in, like, a hospital, basically?
-It's just for -- It's an infertility clinic. Huge place.
So he's like, "We're going to go back first.
And then, I'll come get you."
-So you're not doing it right then and there.
-No, not while they're -- -Okay, gotcha.
[ Laughter ]
-But it's right after.
It's the time where she's, you know,
in the bed and laying there.
And kind of elevated a little bit.
So he's like, "Come back now."
So, we walk back.
And then I noticed he has, like, a laptop set up.
He's set up a music intro.
Next thing you know, he comes out with a rainbow afro,
like a clown afro.
And he's doing a whole intro, like a thing.
He was opening the "show."
-Wow, I thought I had bizarre gigs in my life.
But this is unbelievable.
-Yeah, and we were in the hallway like...
And nurses are going by like, "What is happening?"
[ Laughter ]
So I go in first and, you know, I do my opener.
And so some nurses come in,
and some stay to watch and they're laughing.
And the doctor comes in from the other room.
She's like, "What is going on?
This is a very trying time in couples' lives.
And you guys are in here laughing."
I was like, "Brah, this wasn't me."
[ Laughter ]
This was the last gig I wanted. -It's a paid gig!
It's the clown's fault. It's not my fault, yeah.
-So I finished. Dana finished. -And they laughed.
-And it worked. So I'm funny, apparently.
-Yeah. It worked! -It worked.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-They have a baby? They have a baby!
That's great news! It worked. You are funny.