- Today, we suck.
- Let's talk about that.
(upbeat theme)
- Good mythical morning!
- And please welcome our new friend,
the star of the new Netflix show, V Wars,
it's Ian Somerhalder!
- Whoo! (claps)
- Give us one of these.
- Double shake, double shake.
- Oh, yeah!
- Welcome to the show, man!
- Whoa.
- Okay, so you were on Vampire Diaries for eight seasons.
Now you're on V Wars.
- Yes.
- About this ancient disease
that turns people into vampires.
Tell me, do you like garlic bread?
- That was a very interesting, sort of non sequitur segue.
- Yeah.
- I love garlic bread.
- That's right.
- Yeah, it doesn't affect these vampire.
- Oh, okay, bummer.
- Okay so we all know that vampires possess
a supernatural ability to suck hard on unsuspecting necks,
but how hard can we suck?
It's time for, "This Game Might Be Hard
"as the Rock of Gibralter,
But Let's Suck Some Stuff With Ian Somerhalder".
- Okay, we're gonna be given glasses of blood,
which is really just red drink,
and then we're gonna be given three straws
which will have three levels of sucking:
easy to suck, medium to suck, and hard to suck.
- Okay.
- We're gonna then compete by using our straws
to suck down all of the blood
and whoever empties their glass first gets points.
The harder the straw, the more the points.
- Okay, and to determine who gets which straw,
we have to answer a vampire-related trivia question.
And who has the closest answer, according to Stevie,
gets to assign the straws to the people.
In the end, the winner will receive a sultry,
mind-reading vampire smolder from Ian Somerhalder.
- Oh, wow.
- Don't give it!
(laughs)
You just gave a little peek!
- It's only for the winner,
even if that's you. - Let's suck.
(upbeat music)
- Okay, so we got red Gatorade to start with.
- Blood, this is blood.
- This is the easy straw.
This is the medium straw, which is kind of,
you know, it's gonna have to travel distance.
- And over here, I have the most difficult straw,
which is stacked Barbie heads.
- Okay, I don't know how well that'll work.
I guess that's the point.
Okay, so we're gonna answer this question
and then figure out who is the decider.
- Right.
- And assign the straws.
- Let's see the first question.
The Ancient Greeks believed that blank turned into vampires
when they blank.
You know those Ancient Greeks.
They would believe some stuff.
(mumbles)
- This might be too, no.
- I don't know if I'm smart enough for this one.
- All you gotta do is be closest.
You don't have to be right.
- Don't worry guys, I know the right answer, so.
- Greeks, I'm going with Greeks.
- Okay.
- Okay, all right.
- [Stevie] Okay.
- We ready.
- [Stevie] Rhett, let's see what you got.
- Again, went with the Greek theme.
The Ancient Greeks believed that people turn into
vampires when they ate yogurt.
(crew laughs)
- Okay, you made it three blanks.
- 'Cause of, you know, there's a bacteria.
- [Stevie] Okay.
- Greek yogurt?
You're changing your answer?
- No, I just added one piece.
(laughs) - Oh.
- I just added one piece.
- You didn't add 'yogurt', did you?
- No, I added 'Greek'.
- Oh, okay.
- I added 'Greek' just to.
- [Stevie] All right Ian, let's see it.
- What's yours?
- So, Ancient Greeks believed that Greek cowboys
turned into vampires when they rode.
(crew laughs)
- Oh.
- I love a good Greek cowboy. (laughs)
You know, it's hard to ride a horse
when you're wearing one of those Greek outfits.
What's that, a toga? - [Stevie] Link?
- The Ancient Greeks believed that philosophers
turn to vampires when they died.
- Oh, okay.
- [Stevie] Okay, the answer is:
The Ancient Greeks believed that redheads
turned into vampires when they die.
- Oh. - Ah.
- Philosopher's pretty close.
- [Stevie] Link has one of those words correct.
And I guess.
- Redheaded philosophers.
- [Stevie] Yeah, exactly.
- But redheads love yogurt!
- All right.
I'm gonna give Rhett the hardest straw
'cause I don't yet know.
- We're just starting our friendship.
- Yeah, I don't want to make you suck too hard
right off the bat.
- I can suck right through.
(crew laughs)
I'm not worried.
- So if you win, you get three points with that one.
- Yeah, exactly.
- [Stevie] All right, are you guys ready for this?
- So I'm going for one point, Ian's going for two,
Rhett's going for three.
- [Stevie] On your marks, get set.
- How is this the easiest?
- [Stevie] And suck!
(sucking noises)
- There's nothing coming!
(sucking noises)
(coughs)
These doll heads are very porous.
(sucking noises) (Link hums)
- Boy, this Gatorade tastes like a hot dog.
(crew laughs)
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, you're cheating!
You're cheating!
- It was an opportunity.
- Ian's losing valuable time trying to fix the straw.
You're still cheating.
- No one saw.
Your engineers didn't do this properly.
- I'm getting so much air!
- I'm really gonna have to pee on the freeway.
- It's really tough to get a good grip on a doll's head.
(dry sucking sounds)
- Mine's getting smaller.
Oh gosh, you did it.
(ding)
I know that you cheated.
- All that for nothing!
(crew laughs)
- Aight, listen.
I had the freaking easiest one and this was difficult.
The harder you suck, the urethra collapses.
(laughs)
(upbeat music)
All right, Rhett, what's our easiest straw?
- Okay, easiest straw is a kazoo.
Medium straw is a sweet potato.
(laughs)
- And the most difficult straw is this flute.
- Do you have enough fingers? (plays recorder)
You really gotta get some power with that thing.
That a big barrel straw.
- Yeah.
Well also, too, we have to address this piece.
- There's a hole.
- I think you're gonna just have to lip it.
You're gonna have to like, ah.
- You gotta go all the way.
- You seem to really want this.
And what are we drinking?
- No, I'm just a problem-solver.
- Strawberry-flavored all-mond milk.
Or al-mond milk if you're in the central California region.
- Question please.
Oh, what is Vampire Chase saying?
Gotta read his freaking lips?
- [Rhett] Say it again, Chase.
- [Link And Rhett] What?
- [Ian] Are you kidding me?
- [Link] What?
Again.
- [Ian] Okay.
- [Link] He's laughing at himself
'cause he knows how freaking difficult this is.
What?
- [Stevie] Guys, let me tell you,
when you have the answer to this,
it seems so easy.
- Gee, thanks.
(crew laughs)
- Oh, gosh.
- I think it's safe to say he's not saying what I wrote.
But I hope I'm close.
- Sort of like Greek cowboys and yogurt.
- Yeah, right.
- All right.
- [Stevie] Okay, Link, - I like the production video.
- [Stevie] let's see what you got.
- I think that he was saying,
"you have to play with my play".
- Oh. (crew laughs)
- I don't know what that means, but that what
it looked like he was saying.
You have to play with my play.
- [Stevie] Okay, Ian?
- It looked like he was saying,
"you have a lot of blood"
- Oh. - or something.
- You have a lot of blood.
- Something you have a lot of something.
- [Stevie] And Rhett?
- I said, "you have a blimpy play."
(crew laughs) - Oh, we're pretty close.
- Oh, you saw play.
- Like Blimpy, the old sub thing.
It's a play about Blimpy and the history of that restaurant.
- Whatever, okay.
- [Stevie] Okay, let's see what Chase actually said.
- We get to hear it.
- You have a plump neck.
(laughs)
- You have a plump neck.
- You have a blimpy play.
- [Stevie] I feel like this one goes to Ian, right?
'Cause it's the most vampire themed.
- Yeah, you have a lot of blood.
- Well I have four, you have a.
- Yeah, all right.
You win so you get the power of choice here.
- You clearly wanted this.
- No, no, no, you were already focusing.
- I think you knew how.
- He's like a recorder flute kinda guy anyway.
- We just talked, I just walked you through that.
- Okay, okay, whatever, I'll keep it.
Three points.
- Yeah.
And brother, I know we're just starting
our relationship, too.
- Yeah.
- But, I do think that it's gonna be really awesome.
- Yeah.
- To watch that.
- And not have to do it.
- My uncle used to grow yams.
- Okay, so Ian is going for one point.
I'm going for three.
Rhett's going for two.
- [Stevie] Here we go in.
- Wait, wait, wait, hold on, I gotta get set up, sorry.
- [Stevie] Three. - I know this isn't my show.
- [Stevie] Two, one, suck!
(recorder plays)
- Oh man, I've covered all the holes.
Oh, there's another hole.
(sucking noises)
- [Stevie] Oh Rhett.
(ding)
(laughs)
- Copy you.
- You know what?
That was pretty good.
- It is really good.
- I like a little yam in my almond milk.
- But if I raise this up, does it, nope.
Okay, whatever.
(upbeat music)
Shirley Temples are up.
What's the easiest straw?
- The easy straw is a taquito.
The medium straw is a pickle.
- And the most difficult straw is corn.
(laughs)
- Corn straw!
- All right, what's our question?
How many bulbs of garlic are in this jar?
Okay.
One, two,
three, four.
- Is it closest without going over or just closest?
- [Stevie] Just closest.
- Hmm, just closest.
Okay, got it.
- You looking at my score?
- I'm looking at the garlic.
- I looked at your answer.
It's different than mine.
(laughs)
- Okay.
- [Stevie] All right, Ian, go ahead.
- 34, he says.
- [Stevie] Okay, Link?
- That's kinda conservative.
I'm like, 101.
- [Stevie] And Rhett? - I did math.
- I said 79.
- Okay.
- Well, if you look, it looks like
one, two, three, four, five.
Maybe there's seven or eight.
- I was like 10 times 10 is 100.
- Eight, 16, 24.
- [Stevie] Rhett, the answer is 74.
- Are you (beep) me?
(laughs)
- This is my thing, y'all.
- Dang, man.
- This is my thing.
- Wait, is it really?
- He's a good guesstimate.
You know what, give me a chance to come back.
- I think the corn straw is gonna work for you, man.
I feel like it's a three point opportunity.
And you can get into the lead.
It looks like a good, solid straw.
And, you know what, I actually don't,
I'd only get one point for getting it through this thing?
- [Stevie] Two.
- Two points.
And how much is this?
- One!
We've been playing the game for a while now.
- You get the taquito, my friend.
- All right.
- You're the sweetest. - [Stevie] Here we go.
- He's afraid of you, that's why he gave you the one.
- I'm afraid of him? - [Stevie] On your marks.
- He's afraid of you.
- [Stevie] Get set,
suck!
(sucking noises)
Rhett, you've done it again.
- I got so close!
- Wow, that corn straw, it really works!
- It was tough, though.
It was tough.
- Orville Redenbacher, my butt hole.
(crew laughs)
(upbeat music)
This is, what?
- Tomato juice.
- Great.
- And this is, this dog toy,
which, by the way, has a very large bottom.
- Oh, wow.
Or that could be the top.
- That's number one.
And then, of course.
(chimes sounds)
- Wind chimes.
- Wind chimes are the second straw.
- Wind chimes are two points.
Three points is a pipe.
(laughs)
- Okay, and on this question,
we're gonna be talking about
from Goop, the physic vampire repellent protection mist,
which it says to spray around the aura
to protect from psychic attack and emotional harm.
So I'm just gonna spray it around your auras.
- Gwyneth Paltrow developed this?
- Yeah, she's smart.
- She's crushing.
- She's fancy.
It has a nice.
- I like that.
- That's an aura encompassing scent.
- All right, what's the question.
- What if I turn into a murderous beast and just.
- Does it say that on the bottle?
- I call Gwyneth.
- [Link] This psychic vampire repellent
is an essential oil blend of juniper, lavender,
and what other herb?
Herb.
- I smell a certain thing.
That's all I'm gonna say
and I'm gonna write down what that certain thing is.
Okay.
- [Stevie] Okay, Rhett?
- I smell rosemary.
S-baby.
(laughs)
- Sbaby.
- [Stevie] Ian?
- Coulda been rosemary, damn.
I was gonna say verbena.
- Who's that?
- I went to school with her.
(laughs)
- [Stevie] And Link?
- I can't win.
(all laughs)
Based on the scoring, I cannot win.
- [Stevie] Okay, it goes to Rhett.
- It's rosemary?
- [Stevie] It's rosemary!
You were so confident, now you seem not confident.
- Sbaby!
- It's my day!
Okay.
- Solid.
- Link can't win.
What do I want to see him suck on?
(laughs)
That's the real question.
- This is a family show.
- Listen, I think you need to give Ian the pipe
so that he has a chance of beating you.
- Yeah, yeah, I'm definitely doing that.
- All right, I'm on team Ian.
- Thanks, man.
- I am gonna be sucking on something else,
but I'm gonna be cheering for.
- I want to see you suck.
I want to see you pick an end on that dog toy.
- That is pretty brilliant.
- And go for it.
And then I just think this is like a big smoothie straw.
I don't think it's gonna be trouble at all.
- Go Ian!
- [Stevie] On your marks.
- You can do it!
- [Stevie] Get set,
and suck!
(sucking noises)
- Come on, Ian.
Get the pipe in there, now.
There you go.
- Thanks!
- Come on, suck, suck, suck, suck!
(chimes clank)
Oh, my goodness.
- [Stevie] Rhett.
- Did you get anything?
- [Stevie] You've done it again.
(ding)
- This doesn't actually work.
(laughs)
- You got nothing?
- Hey, that means I took home the victory,
which I get my own personal sultry vampire smolder from Ian.
(Ian clears throat)
- Brace yourself.
- Oh wow, squaring up.
(laughs)
- Did it happen?
- Something happened.
(laughs)
- Maybe I'll get one in More.
Ian, thanks so much for coming on.
And make sure to check out Ian in V Wars,
streaming on the Netflix now.
- Thanks for liking, commenting, and subscribing.
- Now you say you know what time it is.
- You know what time it is.
- My name's Andrew.
And this is my mythical beast, Blitzen.
And we are from Minnesota
where it's currently negative 11 degrees.
And it's time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality.
Ooh!
- Is that a freaking lake?
- Yeah.
- Get off the lake!
- I thought he was gonna throw the dog into the lake
and see what happens.
- I was gonna jump through that screen.
- Click the top link to watch us guess
if the vampire show or movie is real or fake
in Good Mythical More.
- And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality's
gon' land.
- Okay, here we go.
- [Link] You want to wear it proud, you gotta wear it loud!
The GMM green wash set is available now at Mythical.com.