- Now when you're dating in your 20's,
the world is your oyster.
Dating is really fun, there's no pressure.
And all the guys that you meet seem to be pursuing you
and they're also just free of baggage.
And then once you hit your 40's, things start to change.
When you're dating in your 40's,
it doesn't feel like the world is our oyster anymore,
it feels more like a rotten oyster
that gives you food poisoning.
Cheating, every guy has cheated before in his life.
Every guy seems to have a baby mama,
he's got to deal with,
you got to deal with the mama drama
and all of these guys seem to have low testosterone.
And then there are other guys who are still finishing up
their divorce or you find out, yes, he drives a Mercedes,
but he's also bankrupt.
Finding love in your 40's can be a little bit trickier
but once you understand how to navigate
the today's dating scene I assure you,
you can actually make an incredible experience.
Now look, I get it.
The vast majority of my clients
are over the age of 40, 40's, 50's and 60's.
And I should tell you that I understand
it can be a little bit trickier
but once you understand the tips,
I'm gonna go over in this video.
I'm going to give you some insight as to how
you can actually successfully find love
and do it in your 40's and beyond, keep watching.
(mellow music)
Hey there, I'm Adam LoDolce from lovestrategies.com
where I help successful single women get out there
and attract long lasting love
and do it with a proven strategy.
And if you enjoyed this video and you want more videos,
for those of you who are in your 40's, 50's,
and 60's and beyond,
please give this video a like, don't forget to heart it
if you're watching on Instagram
or wherever it is you're watching.
Most importantly, don't forget to subscribe
because if enough people like this video,
we'll be happy to do a follow-up.
So here are six tips that you can use
to find love after 40.
Tip number one is to avoid coming on too strong.
Where are you from?
Have you ever been married?
I mean, how many times, I mean, why did it end?
What happened?
No, seriously, where are you from?
Why are you still single?
Look, I get it.
You have been through a lot and you want to skip
over the BS part of dating
and just kind of get to the heart of it
which is, are they in or are they out?
You feel like you've been through all that stuff
and you want to just get to the point
but the core principles of dating still apply
no matter what age and that is that men don't remember
the things that you're saying,
they remember how you make them feel.
And if guys feel like you are grilling them
on this first few dates and really just skipping
over the fun part of dating
which is just bantering and flirting,
then they are very quickly going to lose interest
and going in a different direction.
That's why we've developed what we call
the little love steps.
And there are seven little love steps
that you can take to help you go
from being single, confused and frustrated
in your love life to finding long lasting love
and in little love step number three
when you're actually getting out there meeting quality guys,
give you a lot of ways to keep your flirting game
in place so that you can have banter
in that fun, playful conversation.
And just see if there's conversational chemistry
between the two of you before getting
to that more important stuff down the road.
Tip number two is to not wall off your heart,
As a psychotherapist and blogger, Eileen Cohen says,
"When we lose the ability to be vulnerable
"and close ourselves off to love,
"we also lose our ability to experience
"the joy that comes from relationships."
Long story short, you've probably been
through a lot in relationships,
maybe you've been through a divorce,
maybe you're even a widow
but the reality is that you need to get back
on that horse and you do need to open up your heart
because I don't want you
to have what I call black heart syndrome.
- You have what I call and I work with a lot of women,
it's called black heart syndrome, okay.
It's you've been burned but you're a lovely amazing person.
And all we need to do is get you to red heart syndrome
which is just being finally open
to the potential possibility of finding love.
- And everyone you're talking to just knows
that your heart isn't really actually available.
And you've been so frustrated and let down
annoyed by men and their behavior
that you can't go into any new relationship
with an open heart.
So moving forward, I want you to really practice
the ability to be a little bit more vulnerable
especially as a guy actually earns your trust.
Tip number three is for you to get really clear
about the man and the relationship you really want.
Typically, when I work with clients
who are over the age of 40,
they tend to have a long list of the things
that they don't want in a guy
yet they haven't quite done enough work,
really trying to understand the type of man
they really want and that's why we have
what we call a little off number two
which is to create your love vision.
It's where you get crystal clear
about the man and the relationship you want
because if you don't have a bullseye,
you will miss it every single time.
And if you want to learn all of the little love steps,
just head on over to littlelovesteps.com.
We'll also leave a link
in the description right there below.
And all of that stuff is covered in that free training.
Tip number four is don't limit too narrowly
the type of man that you want.
I know plenty of women who wanted to end up
with that tall, suave CEO type who drives a Maserati.
And then they ended up with a shorter,
slightly balding guy who happens to have an IT job
and lives in the suburbs, did they settle?
No, they didn't settle so long as the relationship
is fueling them in the way that they want.
Here Love Strategies, we believe that we want you
to be attracted to the guy you end up with,
but we don't focus all of our energy
on the superficial things in life.
And this is where dating apps really fail.
Is it sets you up to become incredibly superficial.
So I ask you to widen your net just a little bit
and really open up the possibilities
to different types of guys,
because at the end of the day,
the only thing that I care about
is that you are in a happy, healthy, committed relationship
that lasts for the rest of your life.
Tip number five is to always maximize
your opportunities to meet men.
From this day forward,
I want you to be what we call a yes woman,
say yes to any event or you party you can go to,
assuming you can be safe in this particular environment.
Make sure you are saying yes.
If you're asked on a date and the guy tends to meet
what it is you're looking for,
be willing to go on that date, be a yes woman
and maximize your opportunities
because you might just end up not being really surprised
about the type of guy you ended up being attracted to.
And finally, tip number six is to just be open
to different types of family setups and lifestyle.
Now let's say you have a 14-year-old son
and you have sworn off wanting to raise any other children.
And you say, I'm not gonna talk to any men
who have younger children then let's say 14.
What are you really going to do
when you meet a really incredible guy
who has a five-year-old daughter.
You're probably gonna be open to it, all right
because what's most important is the relationship
between you and him.
Now, it's not to say that you shouldn't
have some deal-breakers.
I certainly support that, I think that that's important
but be sure to not narrow that scope too much
and be open-minded because once you get
to the 40's, 50's and 60's,
everyone has very different types of lifestyles.
And in order to really build a relationship that lasts,
you're ultimately going to have
to adopt each other's lifestyles
and mend them and combine them.
So I wanna hear from you in the comments below
which of these tips do you really need to focus on?
And finally, if you are really ready to get out there
and attract long lasting love,
don't forget to head on over to littlelovesteps.com
to access that free training that will walk you through
the seven little love steps
to attracting long lasting wealth.
Thank you so much for watching.
I'll speak to you,
you sexy single lady next week, bye bye.