They say boys don’t cry, but they also say not to bite into a molten lava Hot Pocket,
so… which is it?
Hi boys and girls, Jules here for DNews.
Babies cry, children cry, and doves cry.
But under no circumstances are boys supposed to cry.
It just isn’t manly, we’re told.
It’s something that women do, apparently.
But it turns out, that’s not quite true.
In fact studies show that from infancy until around age 5, boys express their feelings
more than girls.
A 1999 study by Harvard Medical School and Boston Children’s hospital found that boys
were more likely than girls to fuss, ask to be picked up, and most importantly, cry.
So if you want to be very literal, boys do cry.
But what happens after age 5?
Do they slowly become less emotional until they are stoic pillars of strength and officially
a “man”?
That doesn’t seem to be the case either.
One study by psychology research institute Mindlab gathered a group of 15 fathers and
15 mothers and showed them a series of videos.
The researchers categorized the videos as either funny, exciting, blissful, or heartwarming.
While they watched the videos, participants’ emotional responses were monitored by electrodes
on their fingers.
The electrodes recorded marginally higher responses for men when they watched blissful,
funny, or exciting videos.
But when the men watched a soldier coming home to his daughter,they were a mess inside,
recording twice the physiological response women did.
Men are still emotional on the inside, even more so than women, it would seem.
But they don’t show it.
That Mindlab study surveyed the men and women after they watched the videos, and men consistently
self-reported having less of a reaction than women.
So boys don’t shed their feelings when they grow into men, but they do seemingly cry less.
Why?
Well, while some are quick to blame societal structures, there is also a bit of biology
behind it too.
The American Psychological Association reports that testosterone, which floods young boy’s
bodies during puberty, may actually inhibit the crying reflex.
Meanwhile, prolactin, which is found in higher amounts in women and stimulates milk production
after childbirth, may promote crying.
But this isn’t the end-all reason boys don’t cry.
When society teaches men that expressing their emotions is unacceptable, they repress them
instead.
Niobe Way, a professor of applied psychology at New York University has been studying how
emotional repression affects boys.
Her research has shown that boys form deep and meaningful friendships in early and middle
adolescence that are just as emotionally intimate as the friendships young girls develop.
But by age 16 they’ve distanced themselves from other men, even though the desire for
those strong bonds remains.
Other research has shown this is about the same time men start falling behind in schools.
Sociologists Thomas Di Prete and Claudia Buchmann found that boys who strive for good grades
are mocked by their peers.
Meanwhile boys who participate in “un-masculine” but more expressive activities like music,
art, and drama tend to get better grades.
Better grades can lead to better colleges, so proving you’re manly to your teenage
buddies can have lasting consequences for the rest of your life.
It can even cut your life short.
Age 16 is also the point when male suicides begin to rise.
Psychologists believe the correlation with emotional repression is not coincidental.
Men who are depressed are less likely than women to ask for help.
So while society is quick to say “man up”, it may ultimately be hurting all of us.
It’s 2016, go ahead and cry, whoever you are.
And if you want to laugh cry instead of regular crying, then you should check out the team
over at SourceFed!
But only if you’re into gut-bustingly funny takes on pop culture and current events.
It’s kind of like DNews, but faster, and with more jokes.
So click the link below to get your daily dose
of SourceFed!
Men can feel emotional pain just as strongly as women, but what about physical pain?
Find out in this video by Lissette
Do you ever stifle how you really feel, or do you wear your heart on your sleeve?
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