Since stepping down from royal duties in 2020,
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have been enjoying life in the U.S. The journey from
their meeting to their "Megxit" was a rocky one, but there were plenty of red flags along the way.
Like most people in love, Meghan would gush about Prince Harry to her friends
early on in their relationship. And, like good friends, those who knew about the relationship
between the royal family and the U.K. press tried to warn her not to get in
too deep. In the ITV documentary "Meghan and Harry: An African Journey," she revealed,
"When I first met my now-husband, my friends were really happy because I
was so happy. But my British friends said to me, 'I'm sure he's great,
but you shouldn't do it. Because the British tabloids will destroy your life.'"
Because she's American, Meghan admitted that she said to her friends,
"'What are you talking about? That doesn't make any sense; I'm not in tabloids.' I didn't get it."
It's understandable why Meghan might brush off the warning, but she paid a big price,
and went on to admit that she wasn't happy.
"Also thank you for asking because not many people have asked if I'm okay."
Meghan went on to say,
"It's not enough to just survive something. That's not the point of life. You've got to thrive,
you've got to feel happy. And I think I really tried to adopt this British sensibility of a
stiff upper lip. But I think that what that does internally is probably really damaging."
"I never thought that this would be easy,
but I thought it would be fair, and that's the part that's really hard to reconcile."
One might think that when welcoming an outsider into the royal family,
official guidance would be offered to help the newbie acclimate to the rules and regulations.
But according to Prince Harry and Meghan, nothing like that happened at all.
In her CBS interview with Oprah Winfrey, she revealed that there hadn't been any guidance,
but she was still expected to know the right way to behave. She explained,
"There were certain things that you couldn't do. But, you know,
unlike what you see in the movies, there's no class on how to speak,
how to cross your legs, how to be royal. There's none of that training. That might
exist for other members of the family. That was not something that was offered to me."
Meghan said she would Google things she didn't know — like the lyrics to the British national
anthem — at night before public appearances. Harry even had to teach Meghan how to do a
proper curtsy immediately before she met Queen Elizabeth The Second. Meghan said,
"We were doing the training behind the scenes, because I just wanted to make them proud."
As a biracial woman, Meghan had to deal with overt racism in the British press that no other member
of the family had experienced. Some of the most extreme examples included the Daily Mail
saying she was, quote "straight outta Compton" and another piece that referred to her, quote, "exotic
DNA." Meghan was also held to absurd standards compared to her sister-in-law Kate Middleton.
Harry has had to release statements in an attempt to protect Meghan from very early
in their relationship. One statement from 2016 condemns, in his words,
"the racial undertones of comment pieces [and] the outright sexism and racism
of social media trolls and web article comments," among other things. He added,
"This is not a game – it is her life."
An insider told the authors of Royals at War:
The Untold Story of Harry and Meghan's Shocking Split with the House of Windsor,
"It's my opinion that Harry feels he couldn't protect his mother, so he's going all out to
protect his wife. He is so sensitive he often sees criticism or negativity where there isn't any."
"I will not be bullied into playing a game that killed my mum."
Perhaps the biggest bombshell in Harry and Meghan's tell-all interview with Oprah was
that some of Harry's family members are allegedly racist. Meghan said that
before their son Archie was born, there were, quote, "concerns and conversations about how
dark his skin might be when he [was] born" between Harry and unnamed family members.
When Harry joined Meghan and Oprah,
he said he would never share details of the conversation but said,
"At the time, it was awkward, I was a bit shocked."
Oprah later shared with "CBS This Morning" that Harry didn't reveal who was a part of
the conversations off-camera either. But she said he did want to make clear that, quote,
"neither his grandmother nor grandfather were a part of those conversations."
The process of elimination leaves a couple of options. According to the BBC,
after the interview, when asked if his family was racist by the paparazzi, Prince William said,
"We're very much not a racist family."
If the alleged conversations actually happened, no matter who asked the insensitive questions,
it's surprising that Harry and Meghan didn't flee England sooner.
Another important revelation in Harry and Meghan's interview with Oprah involves the reason why the
couple's son Archie wasn't given a royal title at birth. There had been speculation that the parents
made this choice, but Meghan told Oprah that wasn't true. She said it wasn't their "decision
to make," but that she had wanted Archie to have his title for protection. She went on to say,
"The most important title I will ever have is Mom. [...] But the idea of our
son not being safe and also the idea that the first member of color in
this family not being titled in the same way that other grandchildren would be."
Harry and Meghan seemingly implied racist intentions behind Archie not having a title,
but royal expert Daisy McAndrew told Today that royal protocol dictates that only grandchildren
of the reigning monarch have the title of prince or princess, not great-grandchildren.
She said that Archie would have likely gotten a title when Prince Charles took over the throne.
The couple claimed that the royal family was uncooperative about giving Meghan protection
and suggested she continue working. Harry said,
"When [Meghan] wasn't going to get security, when members of my family were suggesting
that she carries on acting, because there was not enough money to pay for her. [...] There
were some real obvious signs before we even got married that this was going to be really hard."
At least he admits the red flags were pretty bright.
According to a 2018 report in the British tabloid The Sun, Meghan allegedly made Kate
Middleton cry during preparations for her wedding because of demands about bridesmaids' dresses.
While she didn't reveal the details of the fight, in her CBS interview with Oprah, Meghan said that
the reverse had actually happened, implying that Kate actually made her cry. She added,
"It was a really hard week of the wedding and she was upset about something."
Tatler confirmed through a source that the spat was about bridesmaids' dresses.
Meghan said that Kate has since apologized to her, and she is forgiven. Still, Meghan told Oprah,
"I thought in the context of everything else that was going on in those days leading to the
wedding that it didn't make sense to not be just doing whatever everyone else was doing which was
trying to be supportive knowing everything that was going on with my dad and whatnot."
It's impossible to know exactly what happened, but a sister-in-law who would allegedly pick a
fight on such an intense week may have been an ominous sign of bigger fights to come.
Prince William and Harry's relationship has always been in the spotlight,
especially since the passing of their mother, Princess Diana. Though they've had some ups and
downs over the years, Us Weekly reported that a true rift didn't start until about 2016 when
William expressed to Harry that he was moving too fast with Meghan. They eventually patched things
up until 2019, when they decided to split their royal charity into two organizations.
Harry confirmed a rift in the ITV documentary "Harry and Meghan: An African Journey," saying,
"Inevitably, stuff happens. But, look, we're brothers,
we'll always be brothers. [We're on] different paths at the moment."
"As brothers, you know, you have good days you have bad days."
In 2020, a source told Us Weekly that William was
"blindsided" by Harry's announcement that he was stepping down from royal duties.
Since then, the road has been rocky. They were together in public in 2020 but barely spoke.
They have reportedly tried to mend things, but in the CBS interview with Oprah, Harry said,
"The relationship is space at the moment and time heals all things, hopefully."
In 2021, the duo was seen speaking at their grandfather Prince Philip's funeral. It's
understandable why tensions are high between the brothers, but it's also hard not to wonder where
Harry and Meghan would be living today if the boys could have learned to support each other better.
In the CBS interview with Oprah, Harry alleged that some members of his family were jealous
of Meghan because of how effortless it was for her to connect with the public.
Referencing Meghan's first big duty as a married royal, Harry explained simply,
"It all changed after the Australia tour."
His mother received similar praise from the public
during her Australia tour in 1983. Harry went on to say of Meghan,
"It was the first time the family got to see how incredible she was at the job.
And that brought back memories."
Instead of embracing Meghan as, quote, "one of the greatest assets" his family could have,
unnamed family members got colder toward her. Referring to his mother's struggles, Harry said,
"I just wish that we would all learn from the past."
Jealousy is natural, but, as Harry pointed out,
the family could have embraced her more to avoid all of this strife.
Prince Harry and Meghan may not have a royal fairytale,
but they're certainly living out their own laid back version of one in California.
One royal expert at Entertainment Tonight said of Harry,
"I think he is loving the California, west-coast lifestyle, it suits him. He has always been a very
laid back person, he loves nature and being by the ocean. So I hear that he is very, very happy."
The pair has a lot to be happy about. On Friday, June 4th, 2021,
the couple welcomed a baby girl named Lilibet Diana Mountbatten-Windsor.
They also announced a production company, Archewell Productions,
and a deal with Netflix in 2020. They revealed their first project,
a documentary series about Harry's Invictus Games called "Heart of Invictus" that will
follow participants of the games in The Hague in 2022, according to CNN.
In December 2020, a branch of their company, Archewell Audio,
signed a deal with Spotify. In a podcast trailer, Harry explained,
"That's what this project is all about, to bring forward different perspectives and
voices that perhaps you haven't heard before and find our common ground."
Harry and Meghan may not be royal anymore, but it's certainly not slowing them down.
On the surface, Princess Diana and Meghan Markle are very different people.
Diana was 19 years old when she married into the royal family, and she came from royalty herself.
Meghan was a 36-year-old biracial, divorced woman.
Yet, they gave tell-all interviews two-and-a-half decades apart that revealed Meghan and her late
mother-in-law have more similarities than the public could've ever imagined.
Most notably, they both admitted to struggling with mental health issues.
In her 1995 interview on BBC's "Panorama," Diana said of royal life,
"You wake up in the morning feeling you didn't want to get
out of bed. You felt misunderstood and just very low on yourself."
In 2021, while speaking to Oprah, Meghan admitted to having had suicidal thoughts. She said,
"I just didn't want to be alive anymore,
and that was a very clear and real and frightening constant thought."
Both women said they asked advisers to the royal family for help
and were denied. Meghan said she had even asked to go to treatment, adding,
"[I was] told that I couldn't, that it wouldn't be good for the institution."
Diana said she wasn't given help when she experienced postpartum depression
after Prince William's birth. She added,
"Well, it gave everybody a wonderful new label.
'Diana's unstable and Diana's mentally unbalanced.'"
Diana said she engaged in self-harming behaviors.
Knowing the struggles his mom went through, it's no wonder Prince Harry
saw the red flags eventually and sought a better life overseas with his family.
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, please contact the
Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741, call the National Alliance on Mental Illness
helpline at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264), or visit the National Institute of Mental Health website.