Previously, on Villager News!
It appears that we're being overrun by giant mobs!
(Gasp) What is this?
Why is the lake enchanted?!
I tripped!
and the potion, fell into the lake!
This citizen has volunteered to swim to the bottom of the lake and pull out the plug.
(crowd celebrates)
(creeper roars)
I'm gonna go play Fortnite until this blows over.
♪ Villager News Theme ♪
(gasps) Villager #4 you came back!
(hushed) no, it’s me, villager #5!
What?! You're not allowed...
Breaking News! A giant creeper has appeared and threatens
villager life as we know it! Villager #9 is on the scene!
Thank you Villager #5! I’m on a cliff overlooking the giant creeper.
it looks like it's attracted some followers.
But that's not the only bad news!
The giant creeper’s explosive force is now the same as 100,000 blocks of TNT!
That's right! If that creeper explodes, it will be the end of the world!
Also, it's heading for the village.
er... Daddy, should we move?
Dad? Dad?!
Run away son!
We are prepping the military as we speak, but with no
antidote for the potion, it may be a waste of time.
But there is an antidote!
...
(screams)
OOF!
Nobody asked!
Yay! A friend!
Ew, get off! Don't touch me!
Ladies! Listen up!
This is the antidote!
I need one of you to take this, climb the giant creeper
put this in its mouth and save the world!
The rest of you will take on the army of creepers.
(Creepers hiss)
(Creeper hisses agrily)
Who's it gonna be?!
Step forward!
Argh! What? No!
Well done soldier, here's the antidote.
and remember, the fate of the world depends on you!
I'd like to say you're indispensable...
...
Well... let's get to it.
Now go! Go go go!
Uh?
Argh!
(Villager war cries)
(creeper cries out)
(Creeper hisses)
(Growls)
♪ Fantasy battle music sung by Villagers ♪
(Villager Firetruck sirens)
(gasps)
We can't get through, there's too many of them.
(off screen) Leave it to me!
Villager #4! He's back from Fortnite!
(panting)
(cries out)
UGH!
ARGH!
(tiny hiss)
Well that's it for this edition of Villager #4
See you next time...
Villager #4! No!
The antidote! It's gone, what do we do now?!
(gasp)
Well look who it is! ...who are you? We’ve never met.
Yeah so...
You got anymore of that... Antidote?
Oh, you want this?
Well you can’t have it, it’s my last one.
Aw, pleeeeease... What do you want?
I want to be released!
Him too!
Hello! I've been here since 2013!
(gasp) You got another antidote!
Wait! Is that guy littering?
(maniacal laughter)
Nobody's stopping me now!
(maniacal laughter continues)
We need someone else to take the antidote
But this is our last chance!
If we don't do it this time, we're doomed!
We need someone reliable. Someone we can trust.
What about Testificate Man?
No! No. He doesn't want to.
How do you know he doesn't-
I just know, alright.
Besides, he's busy, marketing his book.
You should read it, it's very good.
What about him?
♪ Orchestral Villager News Theme plays ♪
Villager #9 here reporting from the battlefield
I have been chosen to protect the realm and save the world!
You can do this Villager #9!
I believe in you!
I'm saying this now so I can have a flashback later!
Uaaargh!
(Creepers hissing)
Uaa-argh!
Uaa-aa-aa-uaargh
We can't fly through this!
The creepers are gaining ground!
Send in the 'Daladas'!
♪ Da da dalada, Da da dalada, Da da dalada ♪
♪ Dadada da da da dadada ♪
(choir) ♪ Kor-ah ♪
(choir) ♪ Rah-tah-mah ♪
huh?
Boop.
(Missile impact explosion)
Now! Go!
Almost there!
Hey! Did you know? I'm a helicopter!
Me too! I'm also a helicopter!
I know! You're a helicopter. You are ALL a helicopter.
Not all of us!
What?!
(Creepers hiss)
Not all of us.
(Explosion)
Uaargh...Ooof
(gasp)
(Creepers hiss)
(Creeper snarls)
(gasp)
It's too close to the village!
We need to push it back!
Artillery!
What!? No!!
(Artillery shells fired)
Aargh!
ua-aargh
Uuaa-aargh!
A-argh-ua-argh
Uh?
(Giant creeper roars)
(gasp)
(hiss)
(gasp)
Commander! Why would you do that?!
Everyone, there's been an update!
We got new clothes and there's bees an-
I-I'll come back later
Er
Arh
You can do this Villager#9, I believe in you.
I’m saying this now so I can have a flashback later. Aaaargh!
(Growl)
Arh
Arhh
Oh
Er
Erh
Aaaaaargh!
Aargh! How could I have imagined such a horrible series of events?
Luckily none of that actually happened. He’s still up there.
Arh
Aaaarrgh
Arh Aaargh
Err
Aaaarrgh!
(Pop)
(Celebrating)
(Creeper Hiss retreat)
Yeeeaaahhh! You did it Villager #9!
Well of course he’d do it, he has plot armor
Like everyone in the last season of game of thrones
I wouldn’t be too sure, where is he?
Villager #9?
Whe-where’s villager #9?
(Church bell chimes)
You’re probably too young to remember, but Villager #9 saved the world
It was yesterday
He did it by riding a dragon into battle and burning down everything in his path
Completely disregarding his previous stance on doing that.
No he didn’t
No, you’re right, he didn’t.
That would be stupid
Villager #9 wasn’t like everybody else
He was completely unique
The way he talked
The way he looked
All different
He was one of the best
Almost as good as Testificate Man who I’m sure is doing something very important and..
Brave... right now
Anywho, let’s go home
Hey, Remember when all those giant mobs everywhere?
Whatever happened with that
Err they’re still here. We didn’t fix that
Oh, is that the subject of the next video then.
Nah probably not
(Wither roar)
And that's it for this edition of villager news
And to play us out, as a tribute to villager #84
Here’s the song that was playing when that poor dude got squished by that giant rabbit. Enjoy!
♪ In my village ♪
♪ There is a huge lack of wood ♪
♪ There's a hole in this big neighbourhood ♪
♪ All our homes we had to build them back up ♪
♪ But now they're made of dirt ♪
♪ I wanna know where my wood is (YEAAAH WOOOD!) ♪
♪ I want you to show me ('Cause we're talking about so much wood!) ♪
♪ I wanna find where my wood is (I WANNA KNOW WHERE MY WOOD IS!) ♪
♪ I know you can show me ♪
Ok, So how do we get more money to make videos
We could get people to Like, Subscribe and click the Bell!
We could tell people about patreon!
We could finish an eggs guide to minecraft?