NEIGH NEIGH BIIITCH- Hey guys how are you, that's awehhhhhhh
Today I decided to turn myself into a unicorn , cause over the past few months, around the world in this country
I fully come to bigger discover my aspects of my life that I cannot control are usually dehumanized by a lot of intolerant people
So instead of sitting here living my life like half a human , slowly getting my rights taken away, I decide
I'll just become the second best thing , which is a unicorn. I'm coming a unicorn. Unicorns shit rainbows, I do too too every Tuesday
No I don't. Was that a gay joke?
I'm not sure.. Will some of you guys feel uncomfortable if that was a gay joke? you can drink bleach! I heard that was healthy for you :)
Don't drink bleach
You'll die
MAC
BWAH, BW, BWAH, BW, BWAH BWA, BWAH, BWAH, BWAH
Let's get started. So I bought about unicorn extensions from the 99-cent store. (Last time I checked, things from the 99 cent store don't come in amazon boxes)
(And I guess I'm an idiot.. a real big idiot) and we're going to open them right now. My phone just vibrated.
Or was that my butt? That could have been my butt. It wouldn't be the first time it was my butt
OoOoO I gOt A tInDeR mAtCh! Becoming a Unicorn is working out already. (Gilberto?) more like.. gill in my PANTs
You're cute- okay, so let's open these boxes. Oh my God, this is like an unboxing
fanmail video except I bought these all myself, and I actually hate my videos. I'm joking I don't hate my videos. I despise them
That was satisfying. I think I cut myself- first thing first. I'm gonna start with some duct tape
That's what the first step to becoming a unicorn you always have to put on duct tape, with unicorns on it, duh. Oh my god
We're not just gonna put on regular duck tape and call myself a unicorn. I'm not crazy. I'm insane ah yeah
That's enough that's a for now. I don't know we're gonna do with my body for the rest of this video
So for this video, we're gonna work on the outer appearance, in. Next we have some unicorn bandages that cost too much
For just 15 of them, Who?
Who. capitalism right? It's the greatest ! boom, BAm fixin' rain on these bitches make it raiiin
look how pretty it is
Now lets just put it on my nose, the most dehumanized part of my face. Haha
pow, so now looks like I got in a fight , UnIcOrN
ok for the next thing I wanted to buy a unicorn onesie, but then later discover that they don't make any in my size
Whatsoever, so.. makes sense.Why is there a tattoo of a raccoon- are raccoons and unicorns buddies? Is that where raccoons have been hiding from
us all these years? Is that why they steal all our food? Just trying to feed the unicorn let the raccoons feed the UNICOrns
So I grabbed the second best thing I can think of..
Is it where they make cow onesies my size, but not unicorn onesies? Should I be upset about that? Should I sue? x2
Next we have an inflatable unicorn. You can't even see it. It's an inflatable unicorn party tube- just trust me. It's there
It's there- cause nothing says I'm a unicorn like wearing a unicorn around your waist.. Unicorn sex?
I think so, don't open like a normal human being
Why do people dehumanize me, I open boxes like this? I ripped the instructions, so that's great
Blow up time I have to inflate all of this. Oh my god, I did not think this through. I ca- I CAN'T BLOW ALL THIS UP
Welp, here we go. Oh
I'm dizzy woaah, I need a nap. ha (dad?), Lord, Jesus
Just take the Wheel.
I can't hear anything right now. Everything is fuzzy and I can barely feel myself talking
Oh my God am I drunk I think I'm high I'm on something you can do this whee I'm floating on Clouds, ha
Ha ha we're finish. We're done We're good..
Here we go. There we go. There we go
Neigh, Neigh, BITCh
Okay, stop it
Okay, we got it. Faaasioon. gucci, where? Oh that was a lot of work..
I should just end this video right there, but I WON'T and for the outside appearance, I am missing one key feature
I think we all know what that is
neigh neigh, bitch, I have to dance now. Oh my god I'm faLLING.! Okay, Okay, dancing time. . . ?
That moment when someone comes ringing at the door bell when I look like this! I just got
so terrified. Don't worry is just a package. This is how gay babies are made kids- Now that my outer appearance is complete,
I have to work on my inner appearance. My INNER UNICORN. Oh my gosh. There's a lot of dirt
I should wash my face more- okay, so I bought myself some, wait, hold up,
Lemme get it I can get it and I can get it. I have it. It's in my hand
I swear it's in my hand
So I grabbed myself a bag of unicorn farts cause gas is healthy. . .? Don't Google that. Just believe me
It's alternative fat 100% Magical 100% Majestic 100% Mythical
100% mac- Can you move for a second. I'm tryin' to eat your farts. Whoever knew, that at age 20, on a random day in April
I will be sitting here inside of a
unicorn with a unicorn horn on my head, in a cow onesie, a unicorn bandaid, about to eat a bag of
Unicorn farts for the sake of content . Ya know, 2017 has evolved so much BAM
This is just cotton candy. (?) Yup. This is cotton candy. Taste like cotton candy that was left in the bag for weeks. UNICORN FARTS
Want some? Here, have a bite. Oh, NOW you're watching your figure? I'm just gonna put that back- wasn't that great, Unicorn? What should I call you?
I'll call you Bill. Wasn't that great, Bill.? Bill:Yes, It was so great, Mac..?!
Thank you for the validation. Now go away- Last but not last, you cannot become a unicorn out without consuming
Unicorn meat. unicorns are cannibals isn't that right, Bill?
Oh, now you don't want to talk? You know your old friend,
Com padres, this could have been your mother, this could be your mother and I'm 'bout to eat your mother. How do you feel about that?
How do you feel about that, BILL? (?) How do I open it?
So the can is impenetrable- this is a great video guys- (for the) content
You know what screw it. I'm getting the can opener come on Bill, let's go. Here we go Bill. Bill should be in more of my videos
BOOM- It smells like, nothing.(?) Bill give me strength. What- What is this? What is even happening? What even are these?? oh. .
Oh, I get it. They're stupid for this Ya'll stupid for this. Just a cut up, plush unicorn. How DARE they LIE
I was ready to get my unicorn meat on. Bill, are you okay?
These are fake unicorns. Fake news. We're the real unicorns here. We don't need these knock off
whoever knew that living the life of a unicorn will be so much fun
and there we have it. I have thus officially become a unicorn. Knock, knock. Who's there? Unicorn. Unicorn, who?
What should my unicorn name be? Leave it in the comments down below. But anyway
thank you guys so much for watching my name's Mac, this is Bill. And don't forget to like comment share and subscribe
BWAAAAAH