- Heya playa.
Do you find yourself constantly thinking about someone?
Maybe you recently had a dream about them
or you had some in-person interaction
and now you can't get them off of your mind.
What does it mean?
Do you like them, do you not?
Why do you keep thinking about them?
I'm gonna answer that question, right after this.
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Now sometimes, when you find yourself in this situation,
it might just be that you're starting
to develop feelings for someone
that you didn't know you had.
Maybe you saw them dressed differently one day
or you had a fun conversation with them.
Something new has sparked this idea of them in your head.
So, let's try to dive deep into it and explore what that is.
Let's say recently, you had a dream about someone.
I've been in that situation before, where you dream
about them and as soon as you wake up, boom,
you just keep thinking about them.
You see them in a different light.
So when you maybe see them at work or at school,
or just around the neighborhood, you might,
kind of approach them and talk to them differently
because the dream really changed your perspective of them.
If you're dreaming about them, chances are they're buried
somewhere deep in your subconscious.
You didn't actually choose to think about them,
but they just sprung up.
So what I'd recommend doing
is reaching out to them in person.
If it was a romantic dream, maybe you wanna ask them
to hang out and get to know them better
and see if you can develop something with them now.
If it was just a fun dream that they just kinda were
a character there, you might wanna ask them
to hang out as a friend, to just spend more time
getting to know them.
You lose nothing from reaching out to them
and building a better connection,
especially since they're on your mind.
At other times, people from your past
may sometimes pop up into your dreams,
and you don't really wanna actively pursue
any kind of friendship or relationship or anything there,
you just wanna kinda think about them
and let it run its course.
If that's the case, you lose nothing.
Just kind of continue thinking about them
and understand that eventually,
you're gonna kind of focus on other things.
But what about situations where you have an interaction
with someone and that interaction
has an impression on you.
You can't stop thinking about them.
And thinking about what happened,
what they said, and what they did.
Well, in those situations, I always think the best thing
to do is to actively talk to them.
Because if you had a profound and meaningful experience
that first time around, what's to stop you
from doing it again and continuously talking to them?
Sometimes, they're one-off moments with strangers.
Maybe you had a brief conversation with someone on the bus.
Maybe you saw someone in the store.
Maybe you just kind of brushed passed someone
and had a brief exchange of words.
Either way, in those situations,
where you can't continue anything, I know sometimes,
those thoughts may feel like
they're just impeding on your mind.
And what do you do about them?
You can't talk to them.
You're never gonna see them again.
In those situations, I think the best thing to do is
to kinda close your eyes, think about that experience,
and try to return back to the present moment.
A lot of times, when your thoughts run off
and start thinking about someone
that you can't actively do anything about,
it can make you feel depressed or hurt or angry
that you didn't do something else
in that moment, when you had the chance.
I've had tons of moments where I have an interaction
with someone and then I look back on it and go,
wow, why didn't I do things differently then?
Well, you can't go back and change the past,
but what you can do is tell yourself that,
if I have any other types of moments
or situations like that, I'm gonna act differently.
I'm gonna be more mindful and I'm gonna direct it
how I want to direct it.
But what about situations where you clearly like someone?
And you're constantly thinking
about talking to them, about hanging out with them,
about dating them, about kissing them.
Sometimes there's a fear that by actually interacting
with them more, you might burst that thought bubble.
The idea of you two being together might disappear
if you actually make it a reality
when you interact with them.
What if they're not like you think they are?
What if they're actually mean or not funny,
or just don't like you?
Well now the thought of who they were is gonna be replaced
with who they actually are,
and that can be kinda sad to experience.
So sometimes it feels easier to just stay in the background
to keep thinking about them rather than acting on them
and seeing who they really are.
I know that might seem like the safe and easy option,
but I don't always think it's the best option.
You're better off spending your mental energy
on someone that can reciprocate it back to you.
Someone that's gonna make good use of it.
You wanna think about someone that you care about
and someone that cares about you too.
Not someone that you hope will like you down the line.
And this one's gonna feel a bit weird,
but what if you feel like your thoughts
are a bit inappropriate?
Maybe you're thinking about a family member or a teacher,
or a friend's brother or sister in a way
that you probably shouldn't be thinking about them.
What do you do with those thoughts?
Are they bad?
Does it make you a bad person?
I know sometimes you may wanna beat yourself up
for having these inappropriate thoughts
about certain people, but your thoughts
are not the same as your actions.
You choose what thoughts you wanna act on.
So, when you do have these inappropriate thoughts,
that you feel guilty or weird or bad about,
just remember you could always
come back to the present moment.
Recognize that thoughts come and they go.
So if you're constantly thinking about a certain person,
in a certain way, whenever you encounter that,
recognize it's happening, focus on your breathing,
and then move on with it.
I know it's not always easy to do, but it is possible.
You have what it takes to take back control
of your thoughts and feelings.
You don't have to be a slave to them.
But now I wanna know in the comments down below
who's someone that you're constantly thinking about?
Who's always running through your head?
Leave your comment, share your story and who knows?
Other people in the comments
might be able to connect with you.
Next thing I want you to do, is to check out the video
over there on the side, so you can learn a little bit more
about intrusive thoughts and negative thoughts
and how to deal with them.
That video is gonna help you out a lot.
On that note guys, I'll catch you next time.
As always,
love
and peace.