Ever been in a conversaion where you struggled to maintain any kind of momentum or had awkward
silences?
Chances are you have just like the majority of people in the world today.
However, in this video we look at how you can keep a conversation going, using the FORD
method.
Not only will this help you keep a conversation going, but it will ensure you don't run out
of things to say even if you sense an awkward silence.
1.
What is FORD?
- FORD is an acronym that stands for "Family," "Occupation," "Recreation" and "Dreams", which
are the different subjects you can talk about to keep any conversation going
- You can do this by asking questions related to these subjects and also let the other person
know about you, meaning it's a natural back and forth
- The method itself works in all contexts of conversation, as it can be adapted for
formal events, or generally in social situations - ...and is a great way to have an engaging
and interesting conversation when you meet someone new and are learning about them and
their interests
2.
Family - It's always good to have a few general family
related topics or questions ready for any situation, as not only is this common ground
everyone can speak about, but it helps you get an insight into the person
- For example, the question might be as simple as "Do you have any siblings?" or if you're
getting to know the person, you could delve a little deeper such as asking how they met
their partner - The point is you need to adapt the question
to your relationship to the person, as it can be very uncomfortable to delve deep into
the psychology of a person's relationship to their estranged parents when first meeting
them - However, when talking about family, you
can often find common ground to speak on, such as your kids might go to the same school
3.
Occupation - One that's naturally going to come up when
working with someone new, but one that can also be discussed with pretty much anyone
on meeting them, ask them about their occupation - It could be a simple start, asking what
they do for a living for example, which can be small talk to begin with, but can help
you delve deeper into conversation - That's because you can further ask questions
to learn more about what they do, the impact they make and what they might be looking to
do in the future - People often relate these subjects to their
own circumstances and job, developing a great appreciation for the line of work someone
else does
4.
Recreation - The most common thread of discussion when
meeting someone new, it's always good to find out about interests someone has and what they
like to do to relax or have fun - Often, this can lead to finding common interests,
such as similar tastes in music or movies, as well as letting you learn a little about
their personality - It can also lead to other interests that
can help expand your views on the world, such as when people talk about experiences they've
had when abroad - What's extremely beneficial in this process
is it helps you build a more personal connection, making it significantly more likely you'll
enjoy each other's company more
5.
Dreams - Everyone has aspirations in life and can
become highly engaged when encouraged to talk about the direction they want to take their
life in - I wouldn't necessarily lead with these questions,
maybe waiting to learn more about the other person's personality first, mostly because
people may not always find it comfortable or easy to talk about their dreams, which
can be quite personal - However, it can lead to giving great insight
into the person and their personality, as you can have quite a pointed approach, such
as asking "Is there any place you would love to visit?"
- Or you can ease into it naturally.
Personally, I often pick up on something they'll say about themselves and lead conversation
in asking what they would like to do, such as if someone is learning to play music, I
might ask "do you hope to perform in front of live audiences one day?"
Have you heard of the FORD method and if so, do you use it?
Let me know in the comments section below.
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