Hello my name is Niharika. Well, have you ever wondered how some people can just walk
into a room full of strangers and strike up a conversation with practically anyone? The
reason is because they are really great with small talks. Now small talk are these casual
conversations that avoid sensitive subjects or any kind of arguments. And if you are one
of those shy people, who think that small talk is such a waste of time. Honestly small
talk helps you to build a friendly atmosphere. It helps you to gain self confidence and also
it helps you to get to know people much better, so in this session today we are gonna look
at some tips that would help you to mastering small talk.
The first tip that I have for you to master small talk is, Prepare yourself. Now can you
imagine a football player not warming up before a big match or a lawyer not jotting down the
key points, just before an important case? Well, it’s important to prepare yourself.
Well, especially for shy people. If you’re shy this is the most critical step. You need
to prepare yourself, now probably you can think or jot down the hot topics. And also
your experiences related to it, so if you go ahead and start a conversation with someone
about something, you also have some stuff to talk about it. So for example, you can
think of a new movie that you just recently watched. You can talk about that or probably
a vacation that you are planning with your family or even current affairs. Something
that’s just going on in the world and people are very keen to know about it or to talk
about it. So make sure you jot down some points, prepare yourself and then just go ahead, pump
up your conversation.
The second step that I have for you is, Be the first one. When I say be the first one.
It means that you are supposed to go ahead and start a conversation. Are you one of those
people, who just hang back and get really nervous, when you have to start up a conversation
with someone? Well, you need to quit doing that, you need to be confident enough to just
go up and start a conversation with someone. To begin with, probably you can just smile
and just look at the person, give those receptive signals that would create a positive energy
and then just go ahead and start talking. Now probably if you are in a party, then you
can say, hey how do you know the host? First the very first thing that you need to do is
introduce yourself. Say that, Hi I’m Niharika, so tell me how do you know the host of the
party? So this is the way, you would start making a conversation with someone. So the
most important thing that you need to keep in mind is that you should be the first one.
Don’t just wait and feel nervous that okay someone else will come up to you and start
talking to you. Stop doing that and you be the first one.
The third tip that I have for you is, Listen carefully. Now it’s an extremely important
thing to do, Active listening. When you are having a conversation with someone, it’s
important to pick up the facts, key words and the phrases that would help you to build
a mental picture and continue the conversation gracefully. For example, someone says, Oh
you know Chicago is like my dream vacation. So now you understood, what he or she is talking
about, so to continue your conversation. Probably you can start talking about the city. Probably
if you are grown up in that city, then you would say, Oh that city where I grew up. So
you know this would help you to carry on the conversation carefully. So please make sure
that you listen to the other person, when you are having a small talk.
The fourth point that I have for you is to avoid unpleasant topic. Now its very important
as I said in the beginning that small talk are casual conversations. It’s very important
for you to avoid these unpleasant topics or obscure subjects, Like a divorce or probably
someone being raped or even layoffs. These are very very sensitive matters and at time
these topics, you know create an argument or a misunderstanding. So that definitely
doesn’t create a positive image about you, so make sure you avoid such sensitive or obscure
subjects and stick to very light topics. Like movies, vacations, books or current affairs
or just shopping. So that would help you to have light casual conversations with people.
The last tip that I have for you is, To end the conversation gracefully. Now many people think
that to begin a conversation you have to be the best. But many people fail to understand
that it is very important to even end the conversation gracefully, so please do that,
probably what you can do is, you can highlight the mutual interest. So you have spoken to
the person and you realized that there are many points of interest that really match.
Even you like to do something that the other person likes to do. So go ahead and highlight
these interests and make sure, you end the conversation gracefully. It should not be
an abrupt end, by just saying, Okay bye. That’s incorrect. You would say that its very nice
meeting you or we’ll definitely keep in touch. This is the way you are creating a
very positive impression about you. You know it looks as if you value the person that you
just met. So make sure that you end your conversations gracefully.
This brings me to the end of this session. Hope these tips are really helpful to you
and make sure, you note these tips and g ahead use them to pump up your conversations. I’ll
be back with a new lesson soon. Till then you keep watching our videos, we have lots
of videos about small talks that would help you to gain confidence and
talk with people gracefully.