The Princess Bride contains a few elements that, when watching it as an adult, make you
tilt your head and go, "Wait, what?" Even if you love the film, as so many people do,
here are some of the weird things in The Princess Bride that you only notice as an adult.
"Have fun storming the castle!"
Perhaps you're one of the eagle-eyed few who first noticed this as a child, but most of
us gloss right over the fact that The Princess Bride is set during the Christmas season.
Santa Claus decorations are scattered throughout the grandson's messy room, most notably the
one hanging behind the grandfather on the closet door. Plus, there's a tabletop tree
decorated with lights visible through the bedroom door, and when the mother throws open
the grandson's curtains, a snow-covered rooftop lined with lights can be spotted outside the
window.
Even The Princess Bride book itself is a Christmas gift. It's given to the grandson wrapped in
cheery Santa paper.
At first glance, there's nothing amiss about the scene in which Buttercup tries to escape
from Vizzini, Fezzik and Inigo Montoya by jumping off their ship and attempting to swim
to safety. She starts to swim to the unidentified ship in the distance, but stops when she hears
the screeches of the shrieking eels. Vizzini offers her the chance to swim back to safety,
then Fezzik clunks the eel on the top of its head with a bowling ball-sized fist, and scoops
a shaken but uninjured Buttercup up out of the water.
Everything in the scene tracks, until you realize that Buttercup never actually swam
back to the boat. She swam away for a few solid strokes, putting her about half a pool-length
away from the boat, but then she just fearfully treaded water until Fezzik punched the eel
and pulled her back into the ship. Since the boat apparently never changed course, the
only way for this scene to have happened is if Fezzik's arms suddenly stretched to a ridiculously
long length of probably at least eight feet. He might be a giant, but he's not that much
of a giant. This is probably just a continuity error, but it's fun to imagine an explanation,
isn't it?
Vizzini's plan once his boat reaches the Cliffs of Insanity is simple. Fezzik will carry his
party up the sheer face of the cliffs, using the rope dangling down from the top, and then
they'll press on into Guilder, kill Buttercup, and start a war. When they arrive at the base
of the cliffs, a triumphant Vizzini proclaims that it doesn't matter that the ship behind
them has nearly caught up with them. As he explains,
"Only Fezzik is strong enough to go up our way. He'll have to sail around for hours 'til
he finds a harbor."
Except, the fact that the rope is there implies that Vizzini has already been to this location,
and tied the rope at the top to prepare for this part of the plan. To do that, he probably
used the very harbor he's claiming the other ship can't possibly know about. What's more,
the castle ruins at the top seems to imply that at one point, this was a well-traveled
destination, meaning that the location of the harbor shouldn't be such a mystery. This
raises two questions: One, why didn't Vizzini just use the harbor to begin with, since he
clearly knew where it was? And two, why would he assume no one else had that knowledge?
Everything about the Cliffs of Insanity sequence in The Princess Bride is undeniably thrilling,
from the race up the face of the cliffs to Westley's ability to cling to the rocks instead
of falling. However, when you consider the shots of Westley climbing mere seconds before
Vizzini slices the rope, it doesn't make sense that he'd be able to grab onto the rock face
in the moment he felt the rope begin to slip. Westley would've had to swing on the rope
and jump onto the rocks to have had a chance at winding up in the position we eventually
find him in. Even if there was enough time for him to have done this between shots, why
would he? He was making much better time on the rope than he does on the rocks.
As an additional layer of mystery, how did Westley's boots become so full of rocks once
he reached the top? In every shot we saw of Westley climbing the rope, his legs were kicking
freely in the open air, far from the rocks. What was he doing in the few seconds when
the camera wasn't on him that would not only enable him to grab on to the rock face but
fill his boots with stones? We may never know.
When Westley eventually reaches the tops of the Cliffs of Insanity, Inigo graciously offers
him a chance to catch his breath before they start their duel. While this seems motivated
by honor, Inigo may have also had a selfish motive. Shortly before this moment, Inigo
tells Vizzini that he will be fighting left-handed in order to make the duel last longer. Allowing
Westley time to recover may have been in service of the same goal, with Inigo finding little
satisfaction — and using up less time — besting a winded opponent.
However, there's another indication of Inigo's sense of honor in this scene, one which could
have proven deadly. By telling the story of his father's murder, Inigo hands Westley his
only weapon without hesitation before their duel. If Westley had less integrity than Inigo,
he could've killed him right then and there, while he was unarmed and defenseless. That
it didn't seem to even occur to either swordsman to behave less than honorably in this moment
speaks volumes about the kind of characters they are, and it's why we root for both of
them.
As a child, it may have been difficult to make out every line of dialogue during Fezzik's
fight with Westley, given that both participants spend most of the scene significantly exerting
themselves and occasionally choking. However, if you can catch all of Fezzik's lines, you
may be left wanting a lot more information about his life before he came to work for
Vizzini.
At first, when Fezzik offers to fight Westley in hand-to-hand combat, he explains that he
hates for people to die embarrassed. Just who has Fezzik seen die embarrassed, and what
exactly was his role in their deaths? He also tells Westley, when explaining why he's had
so much trouble fighting a single opponent, that he's more used to groups, specifically
battling gangs for charity. It's hard to simply skate past the fact that Fezzik's past seems
to have included significant mercenary work for neighborhood nonprofits. While no one
wants a Princess Bride remake, we wouldn't turn up our noses at a prequel exploring precisely
which causes these "local charities" in Greenland were championing that required them to have
their own one-man brute squad.
The "Battle of Wits," in which Vizzini talks in circles until finally dying mid-triumphant
laugh from a sip of iocane-poisoned wine, is one of the most iconic scenes in a film
made up almost entirely of iconic scene. So it's easy to miss that the picnic laid out
in front of Vizzini makes almost no sense. Vizzini wasn't carrying anything when he departed
the boat and took the Fezzik elevator up the Cliffs of Insanity, and he didn't appear to
have any supplies waiting for him at the top.
So where did he get the two goblets, bottle of wine, two apples, block of cheese, hunk
of bread, and a cheese knife, not to mention the tablecloth it was all laid out on? Did
he just have it all set up on a random rock, ready to go? And if so, why? Was Vizzini somehow
so clever that he knew in advance that Westley would beat his enforcers and join him for
lunch? If so, we suppose he was right after all — we really shouldn't go against a Sicilian
when death is on the line.
"Death cannot stop true love."
...is one of the most quotable lines in The Princess Bride. But when you think about it,
it's not a very reasonable mantra to live by. When Westley asks why Buttercup didn't
wait for him, she responds, very practically, that he was dead. Remember, he was gone for
five entire years and pronounced dead at some point during that time. Knowing that her chance
to marry for love died with Westley, Buttercup instead agreed to an arranged marriage with
a prince.
However, according to Westley, she should've kept right on waiting for him, despite his
years-long absence and legally declared death. According to his logic, the only course of
action acceptable for a woman who's lost a partner is to remain faithful forever and
unmarried for the rest of her life. Put like that, it's a wonder that Buttercup didn't
drag him up that hill just so she could push him down again.
Probably one of the most memorable scenes in The Princess Bride is Buttercup's nightmare
of being publicly booed for the choices she's made throughout the film, such as her agreement
to marry Humperdink if Westley's life is spared. Buttercup is plagued by the fear that she's
done the wrong thing. And as a child, it's easy to agree with her, swept up in the romantic
notion that she should've dug in her heels and refused to compromise her ideals.
But as an adult, it's easier to see that Buttercup may be unfairly maligned. Throughout the film,
Buttercup shows a lot of courage, keeping her cool throughout multiple abductions, repeatedly
refusing to be bulldozed by the powerful Prince Humperdink, and suggesting strategies to resolve
conflict that would minimize bloodshed. As a woman from a modest farm, Buttercup wouldn't
hold much power, but she uses what leverage she does have to selflessly strike a bargain
that she believes will keep Westley safe, at great cost to herself. It's only once she
believes she's secured Westley's freedom that she finally unleashes her true opinions on
Humperdink. At last, she pushes back against his dismissal of her
"Yes, I am a silly girl, for not having seen sooner that you were nothing but a coward
with a heart full of fear."
All hail Queen Buttercup, indeed.
When Inigo gets the idea to ask Westley to help him plan his castle attack to find and
kill Count Rugen, he and Fezzik follow Westley's screams to the grove hiding the entrance to
the Pit of Despair. There, they encounter the Albino, Rugen's minion who maintains the
Pit in his absence. Inigo asks the Albino where they can find the Man in Black, but
the Albino seems too shaken to say anything. Inigo asks Fezzik to "jog his memory," and
Fezzik gives the Albino a heavy blow on the top of the head. The Albino collapses into
his wheelbarrow and Fezzik apologizes for hitting him too hard.
Watching this scene as a kid, it's easy to assume Fezzik merely knocked the Albino out,
but watching it as an adult, it becomes clear that the Albino is likely dead. The blow he
takes to the head looks extremely forceful, and his eyes remain open as he keels over.
Even if the Albino didn't die right away, Fezzik and Inigo leave him there without medical
attention, making it likely that the severe head trauma he suffered would eventually lead
to death.
After spending the whole film building up to it, Inigo Montoya's final showdown with
Count Rugen is nothing short of spectacular. It's got a chase scene that spans much of
the castle, a moment of devastating doubt when Rugen catches Inigo in the stomach with
a thrown dagger, and more. And it all builds to a thrill of tremendous triumph when Inigo
rallies and kills Count Rugen, repeatedly shouting the line he's been preparing to deliver
since he was 11:
"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."
After Count Rugen dies, Inigo heads off to find the rest of his group, and he's offered
the position of Dread Pirate Roberts by Westley before the four heroes head off on white horses.
But chances are good that Inigo will never live to explore an exciting new career in
piracy. He suffered precisely the same wounds as Count Rugen, which proved fatal for the
six-fingered man. Inigo managed to win his duel, but it was likely adrenaline that allowed
him to ignore his wounds and keep fighting. Once the foursome was out of danger and Inigo's
adrenaline wore off, he likely tumbled off his white horse and died of blood loss. Trust
us, we don't want this any more than you do. Being an adult is hard.
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