So you know how I’m incredibly confident and definitely not awkward or unsure of myself
in any way whatsoever?
Well it wasn’t always like that!
It’s still not, actually, but it used to be worse!
My self confidence probably reached its lowest point around... the 8th grade.
Which might sound pretty scary to any sevies watching, so real quick, if you’re struggling
with self confidence, I just wanna say…
it gets worse.
Anyway, my 8th grade year (and also all the others) were filled with me not knowing how
to act or what to do in pretty much any situation, which lead to a ton of embarrassing moments…
that I can make into a video.
Score!
One time I got a pimple in my ear that itched reeeal bad.
The whole day I was doing everything I could to ignore it, but when I was sitting in history,
it just got way too distracting, so I gave it a little scratch...
I did everything I could to clean up the flood before anyone noticed, but I didn’t just
pop the pimple.
I replaced it.
With a FLOOD FAUCET.
I asked the teacher if I could use the bathroom, and he was like…
“no”
But then I said... “yeah but I’m beeding out of my ear.”
So he was like…
“Fiiine”
Another time, that same teacher sent me to sit in the hall for like, 5 minutes.
I don’t remember why, I was probably talking too much, it’s not important.
I ended up falling asleep in the stairwell and woke up when the bell rang like half an
hour later.
I went back into the room to grab my stuff and the teacher was like “Oh, I forgot about
you.”
Actually, that was probably more embarrassing for him.
At least I got a sweet nap out of it.
One day, I was doodling on my homework in math class.
I was a couple years ahead in math, so I was the youngest kid in the room, and didn’t
really know anyone.
Some people would use that opportunity to be charismatic and make new friends but I
decided to be socially awkward and talk to nobody.
Anyway, I doodled my name like this, because I think it looks cool, and the girl who sat
next to me was like “Woah!
...Do my name!”
I... didn’t know her name.
I’ve never been great with names to begin with, and this was the only class I had with
her, but we were at least half way through the school year.
I definitely should have known.
But you can’t just tell someone you’ve been sitting next to every day for months
that you can’t remember their name.
So I told her... to do it herself.
She never talked to me again.
I panicked, ok?
I didn’t want to be rude, but I couldn’t bring myself to admit that I didn’t know
her name, even though that... probably would have been less embarrassing…
wait
Most of the moments I was mortified about during school were actually not a big deal.
Like, at all.
And I was dumb for thinking anyone cared.
Because they didn’t.
BUT AT THE TIME!
OH!
I would have switched schools just to avoid anyone who ever saw me, like, accidentally
walk down the wrong hallway.
Which isn’t a super embarrassing thing to do, and everyone’s done it at least a few
times, but it’s happened enough to me that if you added up all of the mild embarrassment,
there might be more than from any other single dumb thing I’ve done.
I wonder how many miles I’ve spent walking the wrong way.
I’ve probably burnt so many calories.
There were a few ways I’d try to cover a mistake like that.
I’d check my phone and pretend that I’m turning around because of a text.
Or, I’d just commit, and keep walking down the wrong hall, take the stairs to the second
floor and loop all the way around to where I actually needed to go.
I’d waste a ton of time, just to avoid people seeing me backtrack.
*sigh* What’s wrong with me?
I was talking to a friend about this and when I asked how she’d cover, she was like “Oh!
If I ever went the wrong way, I’d just… turn around.”
Get out.
Looking back, I’m more ashamed at the things I did to avoid embarrassment, than the things
I was trying to avoid in the first place.
So, I guess there’s another lesson for you...
It gets even worse.
Like this one time, I was heading to my locker after lunch, and when I rounded the corner
this girl jumped out and scared me.
I screamed in the highest pitched girly girl voice you’ve ever heard.
I probably broke a few windows.
Of course the girl who spooked me was laughing after a successful spook, so I tried to laugh
it off with her.
At that point I might have escaped with only mild embarrassment, but someone else walked
up and asked what was so funny.
It would have been so easy to say, “I screamed like a girl” but oh no, 8th grade TimTom
went to INCREDIBLE LENGTHS to avoid embarrassment.
So, in an attempt to dodge the question, I just... laughed harder.
I can’t answer the question if I’m busy laughing, right?
But the harder I laughed, the more everyone around us wanted to know what was so funny.
I was drawing a crowd.
Crap.
The more people wanted to know, the more I wanted to avoid explaining anything, and I
had very few options other than to just keep laughing.
After the lunch bell rang we had five minutes to get to class, and it took about one and
a half minutes to clean up and start heading to my locker, which means I stood there fake
laughing for… an eternity.
I was in too deep.
The longer I waited to explain, the higher their expectations were.
My only hope was to just wait them out, and I am not a quitter.
I laughed like my life depended on it.
I laughed harder than anyone has ever laughed in the history of mankind.
My eyes were tearing up, I was clutching my sides, I lost my balance and slid down the
wall.
I made sure the entire school could hear me!
I might have overdone it.
Eventually everyone went to class, and I was left alone on the floor of the hallway.
They all probably thought I was the weirdest kid in school, but hey, at least nobody knows
I scream like a girl.
Alright so, I haven't mentioned it in a video before, but I have a discord server where
you can say hi to me if you're into that sort of thing, I'll put a link in the description,
it's whatever.
And!
If you want me to put your fanart in an end card just tag me on Twitter.
Anyway, thanks for watching!
And I'll see you... later.