LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS AN ICON OF FILM
AND FASHION WHO CURRENTLY STARS IN THE NEW FILM "OKJA."
PLEASE WELCOME TILDA SWINTON!
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
♪ ♪ ♪ ( APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: NICE.
THANK YOU.
>> WOW.
>> Stephen: I MISS-- I MISREAD THE KISS OVER THERE.
MY APOLOGIES.
>> TWO.
EUROPEAN.
YOU SEE, I'M SCOTTISH.
>> Stephen: ON BOTH SIDES.
I NEVER KNOW.
AND HERE'S THE THING ABOUT YOU IS THAT I DON'T ALWAYS REMEMBER
THAT YOU'RE EUROPEAN.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: BECAUSE YOU'RE SUCH A GREAT ACTRESS.
YOUR VOCAL COMMAND IS AMAZING.
>> REALLY.
>> Stephen: MICHAEL CLAYTON, BURN AFTER READING, WE NEED TO
TALK ABOUT KEVIN, GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL, TRAIN WRECK, DR. STRANGE.
NEW YORK LAWYER.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) A COUPLE OF ETERNAL BEINGS IN
THERE.
DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU'VE, LIKE-- HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU'VE
STRUCK THE ACCENT JUST RIGHT?
>> OH, I NEVER DO.
I MEAN, YOU JUST HAVE TO KEEP PLOWING ON AND YOU HOPE YOUR
FRIENDS WILL TELL YOU AND YOU DON'T SEE THE MOVIE.
THAT'S MOST IMPORTANT THING.
>> Stephen: DO YOU NOT SEE YOUR OWN STUFF?
>> YEAH, I DO, AND THEN I DON'T, AND THEN I FORGET, AND THEN I
MOVE ON.
>> Stephen: HOW DO YOU DO THE FORGETTING PART?
>> OH, THAT'S SO EASY AT MY AGE, STEPHEN.
( LAUGHTER ) I'M REALLY ANCIENT, YOU KNOW.
>> Stephen: OH, YEAH, I SAW "DOCTOR STRANGE."
YOU'RE AN ANCIENT ONE.
I JUST WANT TO GET OUT, FAN-LIKE RIGHT NOW, I THINK ONE OF THE
GREATEST PERFORMANCES I HAVE SEEN FROM YOU OR ANYONE IS YOUR
CHARACTER FROM "MICHAEL CLAYTON."
>> OH, THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: YOUR NO MORAL COMP PASS LAWYER TRAPPED IN THAT
MOMENT.
>> WELL, THAT WAS A PART WRITTEN BY TONY GILLROY, JUST BEYOND ANY
PART.
HE NOTICED, WHICH I LOVE, THOSE BAD GUYS, THEY THINK THEY'RE
GOOD.
THEY THINK THEY'RE REALLY, REALLY GOOD.
SHE THINKS SHE'S SUCH A GOOD PERSON.
AND SHE'S SERVING THE BIG DADDY, AND SHE'S WRONG.
>> Stephen: HOW DID YOU GET INVOLVED IN ACTING?
SOME PEOPLE ARE GREATLY INSPIRED BY A SINGLE PERSON.
THEY SAY, "I WANT TO BE THAT PERSON."
COMEDIANS, WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, I SAID,"I WANT TO GET THAT
PERSON'S VOICE.
I WANT TO DO THAT."
WAS THERE SOMEONE LIKE THAT FOR YOU?
>> I NEVER REALLY WANTED TO BE AN ACTOR.
I STILL REALLY DON'T WANT TO BE AN ACTOR.
( LAUGHTER ) IT'S TRUE.
>> Stephen: I HAVE SOME TERRIBLE NEWS.
>> I'M JUST DISTRACTED.
I HAVE BEEN DISTRACTED FOR 30 YEARS.
THE BEST PERFORMANCE I HAVE EVER SEEN AND CONTINUES TO BE AN
INSPIRATION FOR ME IS A DONKEY IN A GREAT FILM BY ROBERT
BLESSON.
AND I'M NOT JOKING, ACTUALLY.
IT'S THE BEST -- >> Stephen: A LIVE DONKEY.
>> PROBABLY ABOUT FIVE OF THEM BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE TO
SWAP THEM OUT, LIKE TWINS FOR BABIES.
>> Stephen: RIGHT, LIKE THE OLSEN TWINS.
>> NO, THE -- >> Stephen: THEY'RE TWINS.
>> I KNOW, BUT THEY WEREN'T SWAPPED OUT.
>> Stephen: THEY WERE.
THERE WAS ONLY ONE OF THEM AND THEY SWAPPED THEM OUT.
I'M NOT JOKING.
YOU DID NOT WATCH "FULL HOUSE."
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BREAK IT TO YOU.
>> I'M WRITING IT DOWN.
>> Stephen: SO A DONKEY INSPIRED YOU?
>> A DONKEY INSPIRED ME BECAUSE YOU JUST CAN'T STOP LOOK AT THE
DONKEY AND THERE ARE ALL THE HUMANS AROUND AND YOU GO, "GET
OUT OF THE WAY.
I WANT TO LOOK AT THE DONKEY."
>> Stephen: I CAN UNDERSTAND THAT.
THEY'RE SO NATURAL.
EVERY TIME I SEE YOU IN A MOVIE, YOU'RE THINKING, "HOW WOULD A
DONKEY DO THIS PART?" ( LAUGHTER )
HOW DO YOUR DIRECTORS FEEL ABOUT THAT?
BECAUSE YOU-- YOU DON'T HAVE CLASSICAL TRAINING--
>> IT'S A SECRET.
I'M NOT TELLING ANYBODY THIS.
IT'S JUST BETWEEN US.
>> Stephen: WE'LL CUT OFF THE CAMERAS.
WE'LL EDIT THIS PART OUT.
YOU ARE SOMETHING OF A FASHION ICON.
YOU HAVE DONE ART INSTALLATION PIECES.
YOU WENT AND PUBLICLY NAPPED AT MOMA, RIGHT?
>> YEAH, YEAH.
>> Stephen: OKAY, YOU'RE VERY COOL.
( LAUGHTER ) YOU'RE VERY COOL.
YOU LOOK COOL.
YOU DO COOL THINGS.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) AND I LIKE TO ASK THIS QUESTION
OF PEOPLE WHO I THINK ARE EXTRAORDINARILY COOL.
I ASKED THIS QUESTION OF DAVID BIRN-- IS IT A BURDEN TO BE SO
COOL?
>> TO BE SO COOL.
>> Stephen: IF YOU'RE ORDINARY IN ANY WAY, PEOPLE GO, "NOT AS
COOL AS I THOUGHT."
>> I FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE A BUTTERFLY NET AND YOU'RE COMING
AT ME AND I'M BACK OFF.
>> Stephen: I DON'T MEAN CRAZY.
A LITTLE ECCENTRIC, MAYBE.
>> MAYBE.
>> Stephen: IS THERE PRESSURE TO BE ARTIE?
>> NO, I MEAN, HOW CAN I ANSWER THAT?
I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT?
( LAUGHTER ).
>> Stephen: I GUESS I'M JUST TRYING TO FIND THE SECRET OF HOW
TO DO IT BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE-- LIKE WHAT DID YOU-- WHAT'S THE
LEAST-- WHAT'S THE MOST LOW-BORO THING YOU'VE DONE RECENTLY?
YOU SEEM VERY ARTIE, VERY HIGH-BROW.
WHAT'S THE MOST COMMONUE KNOW, COMMON MAN LOW-BRIE THING YOU
HAVE DONE?
>> WHERE DO I START?
I LIVE IN THE HIGHLANDS OF SCOTLAND.
THE DAY BEFORE YESTERDAY I WAS WASHING MY DOGS WHO HAD ROLLED
IN A DEAD SEAL ON THE BEACH.
( LAUGHTER ).
>> Stephen: THEY ROLLED IN A DEAD SEAL.
>> AND I COME TO MANHATTAN AND IT'S ALL VERY SPARKLY AND I GET
A VELVET JACKET AND SIT DOWN WITH YOU.
THIS IS HIGH-BROW FOR ME.
BELIEVE ME, WHERE I LIVE, IT'S UNDERGROUND LOW.
>> Stephen: I BET THE HIGHLANDS OF SCOTLAND STILL
SEEMS COOL, SEEMS KIND OF COOL.
IT'S NOT THE LOW-LANDS OF SCOTTLAND.
IT'S THE HIGH-LANDS" OF SCOTT LANT.
>> IT'S TRUE.
>> Stephen: I WAS IN THE HIGHLANDS OF NEW JERSEY
YESTERDAY PICK UP MY DRY CLEANING.
SO YOU STILL LIVE-- YOU'RE NOT FROM SCOTLAND, THOUGH, YOU'RE
FROM LONDON?
>> I'M FROM THE LOWLANDS, BUT I THEN MOVED TO THE HIGH LANDS.
>> Stephen: WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE?
I MADE A JOKE BUT I DON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE?
>> YOU HAVE BEEN.
>> Stephen: I HAD DRIVEN AS FAR NORTH ONCE WHEN I WAS 22,
JUST ABOVE LOCH NESS, ACTUALLY, INVERNESS.
>> THAT'S MORE OR LESS WHERE I LIVE AND THERE'S MORE TO GO AS
WELL.
>> Stephen: IT GETS NARROW UP THERE.
>> AND NOT MANY ROADS.
BUT IT'S QUITE A SMALL COUNTRY, SCOTLAND, BUT LIKE LOTS OF
LITTLE COUNTRIES IT'S HOPPING WITH STUFF.
>> Stephen: DO YOU THINK IT MIGHT SNAF OFF FROM THE U.K.,
BECAUSE THERE'S TALK IT MIGHT SNAP OFF LEAK A GRAHAM CRACKER
AND GO TO EUROPE.
>> THE REALITY IS WE'RE IN EUROPE AND WE WOULD LIKE TO ?AI
EUROPE.
AND THE OTHER REALITY IS WE ARE AN INDEPENDENT COUNTRY.
IT'S JUST ENGLAND THAT ISN'T.
>> Stephen: OH, WOW, WOW.
THROWING SOME SHADE.
SHADE ENGLAND, AFTER 800 YEARS.
>> I'M JUST BEING ACCURATE.
I LIVE NAY VILLAGE-- I SAY "VILLAGE."
IN SCOTLAND WE TALL IT A TOWN BUT BY AMERICAN STANDARDS IT'S
NOT SUPER-SIZED.
NERN.
THEY SAY IT'S THE FASTEST TOWN IN SCOTLAND, NEEERN!
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE A NEW MOVIE.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: THE SAME DIRECTOR WHO DID "SNOW PIECER."
>> AND "THE HOST" AND "MEMORIES OF MURDER" AND MOTHER."
>> Stephen: IT'S CALLED "OKJA."
AND WHAT IS THE MOVIE ABOUT?
>> IT'S A LOVE STORY BETWEEN A YOUNG GIRL AND HER BEST FRIEND
WHO IS A MASSIVE PIG, THE SIZE OF A-- AN ELEPHANT.
>> Stephen: AND I UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR CHARACTER PLAYS THE--
THE BIOENGINEERING SORT OF FARM CONGLOMERATE OWNER WHO CREATED
THIS PIG?
>> YES.
IT'S ALSO ABOUT THE FOOD INDUSTRY.
>> AND PLAY THE HEIR, TO A REALLY SCARY DYNASTY WITH A
HIDEOUS TOXIC PAST, AND I'VE DECIDED TO MAKE IT ALL SEXY AND
MODERN AND WOKE.
AND SO-- ( LAUGHTER )
I DECIDE TO FEED THE WORLD BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, THE WORLD'S
HUNGRY AND NO ONE'S FEEDING THE WORLD.
SO I CREATE GENETICALLY MODIFY-- I SAY THAT WE SECRETLY
DISCOVERED THIS PIGLET ON A FARM IN CHILE, AND IT'S ALL TERRIBLY
NATURAL AND ORGANIC, BUT WE GENETICALLY MODIFY A MASSIVE PIG
TO FEED THE WORLD AND HOLD THE COMPETITION TO SEE THE MOST
BEAUTIFUL PIG.
AND IT ALL GOES BADLY WRONG.
>> Stephen: AND IT ALL GOES BAD AND IN THIS NEXT CLIP, I
BELIEVE, YOU'RE UPSET.
>> I'M UPSET BECAUSE THERE HAS BEEN BAD P.R., AND P.R., AS WE
KNOW, IS THE ONLY IMPORTANT THING.
>> THE SYNTHESIS OF OLD MIRANDO, AND NEW MIRANDO WAS IMPECCABLE.
I TOOK NATURE AND SCIENCE, AND I SYNTHESIZED, AND EVERYONE LOVED
IT.
YOU REMEMBER WHAT THE "NEW YORK TIMES" SAID ABOUT OUR SUPER
PIGS?
LUCY MIRANDO IS PULLING OFF THE IMPOSSIBLE.
SHE IS MAKE US FALL IN LOVE WITH A CREATURE THAT WE ARE ALREADY
LOOKING FORWARD TO EATING.
I MEAN, THESE ARE JOURNALISTS WHO NEVER WRITE ABOUT PIGS.
THEY NEVER WRITE ABOUT PIGS!
THEY WROTE ABOUT OUR PIGS!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: AND IT'S
DELICIOUS, RIGHT?
>> YOU HAVE TO SEE IT.
YOU HAVE TO SEE IT.
>> Stephen: "OKJA."
>> "OKJA."
AND IT'S GOING TO BE ON NETFLIX.
>> Stephen: IT PREMIERES ON NETFLIX, IN FACT, AND IN SELECT
THEATERS ON JUNE 28.
>> GOT TO SEE IT.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE TILDA.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH OUR FRIEND ANDY COHEN.