Hey everyone,
I'm sorry I've been gone for so long.
I've been working on actually a lot and lot of projects
so I had to take a temporary hiatus,
but I think I'm back now.
So I did have another video for you today
but last night, I was on youtube, and I found this video
by one of my favourite youtubers, Jenna Marbles.
You can look like a slut, act like a slut,
but I would only judge you
in how many dicks do you put in your body on a regular basis.
Someday, I hope maybe you realize that it feels much better
when you're just not having so many dicks in you.
John Mayer said: "Your body is a Wonderland", but you know what:
it's your choice if you want Wonderland to be an exclusive club
or if you want Wonderland to be like a theme park
where kids get in for free on Saturdays with their canned goods.
Jenna girl... Oh my, love you,
but man... Now you put me through this!
Jenna starts her video with various criticisms of "sluts"
but the heart of the video is 3 main ideas:
1) sluts don't respect themselves,
2) respecting yourself means not having "a lot of dicks in you"
3) sluts are really just stupid women
and their behaviour doesn't deserve our respect.
Anyone can be a slut but it takes some logic to be like:
"I think I'm just gonna be with one person."
Jenna's video embodies a big fat society-wide problem
called slut shaming.
This video isn't some personal failing on Jenna's part,
so for anyone who thinks I'm trying
to bring a Jenna Marbles smack down: sorry.
This is a personal failing on behalf of society,
that means everybody.
And the solution to this big fat society-wide problem
is not to scream at each other and attack each other,
it's to have a conversation about it, to educate ourselves.
So, let's conversate.
Slut shaming is when we insult a woman
because she expresses her sexuality
in a way we don't like or approve of.
Historically there was a strong strong demand
that women not have sex until they were married.
We said: "Women, you don't give away your precious vagina gift
until you're under the ownership of a man."
We've opened our minds a little bit since then.
Now society says: "OK, fine,
you're not gonna wait till you're married,
you at least better love him."
Bottom line throughout the ages
is that sluts are "different kinds of girls"
who do "bad stuff" and disobey.
Because of her "bad behaviour", we reduce her status
from human being down to giant fucking whore.
And since the "slut" gave up her precious vagina gift,
she doesn't get respect anymore, she's in another category now.
My friend Charlie Glickman once said to me:
"They don't respect sluts, they don't respect women."
And I was like: "F*** yes!!"
Because if we want to believe that we respect women,
that can't be just like: "I only respect women
who do sex the way I would do it,
who only make sexual choices that I think is cool."
Otherwise, all you're saying is: "Home girl,
you need to earn my respect
by having sex the way I think you should."
And honestly, I feel like that's some arrogant bullshit.
Because women are taught to spend so much time
figuring out how to please everyone else.
Women should be figuring out how to please themselves.
You know what I'm saying?
No? Ok... Yeah.
Some of the stuff that Jenna mentions
actually is probably not such a good idea,
like having one night stands without condoms.
Use condoms.
The thing about bad decisions though is that
there are men and women and animals
all thoughout the frigging animal kingdom
that make stupid ass decisions.
That's because we're all stupid.
I'm stupid. You're stupid.
Let's be real.
Humanity is one big fucking stupid party.
The difference is that for women,
promiscuity is considered a "stupid decision".
When you make bad decisions, you pay the consequences.
Like loosing everyone's respect, being shamed,
being called a slut, being bullied,
and perhaps even being assaulted or raped.
"Well, pfff, what did you expect?
You were being a big whore!"
But for dudes, promiscuity is not a"bad decision",
promiscuity is a very good decision.
And even when guys do make bad decisions...
"Pfff... They're dudes!
Dudes make bad decisions sometimes,
they can't help themselves!"
And this, my dear friends,
is what sexism looks like.
Here are some things
that have to do with how much you respect yourself:
standing up for yourself, making your own decisions,
not putting up with people's bullshit.
Things that have nothing to do
with how much you respect yourself:
what kind of sex you have, what kind of clothes you wear,
what kind of make up you put on.
Not doing what you're supposed to
to be a good respectable woman,
does not mean that you lack self respect.
It does not make you stupid
and it does not reduce you to a whole that people fuck.
That's because your value and your worth
is not determined by the type of sex that you have.
We honestly don't help out women,
we don't help out our relationships,
we don't help out our friendships by condemning each other
and telling each other what to do.
Even behaviour we don't understand,
it's complicated and there's a reason for it.
One of the major things that our society needs to learn ASAP
is how to respect other people's safe consensual choices
about their lives and about their bodies.
And I mean really respect people's choices,
not like: "Oh, I'm not judging you..."
*silently judging you*
That's what I think anyway.
And I think that it will help women to stop hating themselves,
I think it will help women stop hating each other.
So, down with slut shaming.
I'll see you guys next time.