What happens when YOU leave a narcissist first? There are FIVE incredibly significant things
that can happen when YOU leave a narcissist first! Full disclosure this video can apply to men
and to women as well, so it doesn't discriminate any type of relationship, any type of situation
with a narcissist! This is what happens when you leave them first, stick around and I'll reveal all!
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Leaving a narcissist can be an incredibly challenging and traumatic, and of course very difficult thing to do.
You're confused, you're overwhelmed, there's like clouds over you, there's a storm brewing...
you're extremely emotional, you just feel like you're on the verge of a complete...
utter mental breakdown, or worse you're already going through a mental breakdown. Or
already had one. But by leaving the narcissist first, you're basically beating the inevitable.
The narcissist was ALWAYS planning on leaving you. Sadly you just didn't know it yet, or perhaps you
did, and you built up the courage to beat them to it! They most likely have already cheated on you,
or were planning to cheat on you anytime soon, or planning to discard you, and replace you
with in their eyes somebody "better suited" for them! So it is from my personal experience that
I highly recommend checking out BEFORE they leave you, if you haven't left yet.
You save yourself a hell of a lot of time, energy and you're more likely to heal better by doing so.
There's a certain degree of confidence leaving a narcissistic relationship first...
rather than having to experience the inevitable discard. Leaving a narcissist also allows you
to get the upper hand on them too, but of course that's not important in the grand scheme of things...
but remember getting one OVER the narcissist in general can be extremely difficult anyway!
Put it this way = they are impossible to communicate with, you never win an argument with them,
they never see things from your angle ever, and they're always causing trouble and they are irrational
and abusive toxic people! So pat yourself on the back for once, you know with these people gaining
a bit of a win over a toxic difficult individual, that is of course if you have ALREADY left them
or on the verge of leaving them! However if you have not OR if you have it doesn't really matter...
or you're thinking about doing it, here are the FIVE things in order that normally happen...
when you leave a narcissist first in a relationship, friendship, work, family, whatever it is!
#1 Narcissistic Rage = the narcissist will be absolutely furious and filled with
rage with you if you leave them or have left them first! Why is that though? It's simple really...
because you've beaten them to it! You've exposed them for the frauds, the cheats, the abusers...
the liars, the psychopaths, the toxic individuals that they truly are! They never ever like losing
they are sadistic, adult sport brats, who believe that they are entitled to everything and anything,
and it should all be given to them for little to no effort ,because of how "perfect and wonderful"
they genuinely genuinely believe that they are! Therefore you leaving them first is the biggest
shock and loss to them! If somebody screwed you over, and you loved that person
you'd be hurt, but you'd be angry as well! That's what they feel like they feel like...
You standing up for yourself AND defending yourself and choosing a BETTER healthier life
is wrong! You're screwing them over, and they also cannot understand HOW this has happened
to them, of all people!? The wonderful narcissists! They purposely manipulated you, they twisted
your reality to think that arguments, and abuse, and drama was a NORMAL part of life...
They did everything in their powers through manipulation, dark tactics etc
to make sure that you STAY with them no matter what! However despite all these dreadful dark
tactics and ways they have done what they've done, you STILL built up the courage to leave
them, or you're on the verge of, or you're thinking about it, so therefore they are furious with it!
They will shout, they will scream, they will be SO SO angry, that you've caught on to the charade,
that you've exposed them for what they really are which is a NARCISSIST!
#2 = Expect further abuse. AKA they will give you further abuse. The abuse you will
receive leaving a narcissist first, is a little bit different to the abuse you received before.
Behind closed doors, in cars with them, even at events, just one-on-one talking, they could almost
say or do whatever they wanted, and they can get away with it, because you stayed with them...
But now you've left, the abuse is still evident... but it's not quite the same as it was before.
If you are leaving them in the middle of the night, or one evening after one of those
final moments where you've just CRACKED, they will hurl names at you, they will abuse you
you know with the worst language you've ever heard, they will scream at you, they have
no problem shouting your neighborhood down for everybody to hear! IF you allow them to, because
one important and vital rule you must adhere to when you leave the narcissist is...
to immediately try and go NO CONTACT, so you CUT OFF that supply, you cut off that abuse.
They will no longer have anybody else to hurl obscenities at, they can't do it because...
if the door is open, and you're there, and you're allowing, you hearing it, they're going to keep
doing it! But if that door is shut metaphorically speaking, physically speaking, they can't do it!
Because they are filled with RAGE that you left them, they feel entitled to abuse you further = "how
dare you leave me! I am amazing! You're the problem!! You're the issue! You're the twisted individual!
You're the sick one!" They will believe you will not stand up to them, because if you've been with
them for as long as you have, (and it doesn't matter how long you've been with them) they
feel that they can get away with it! But you do NOT need to get into a slagging match, you do not need to
get into an abusive argument! You don't need to stand up to them with your words. Do it with your
actions, just do the following instead = DO NOT allow them to talk to you, stick to no contact, do not see
them, do not revisit them, cut contact, cut the abuse, and begin your recovery and your healing journey!
#3 They'll Threaten You = So after they act all furious, and abuse you further
they will begin the MOST destructive and despicable game that they can play with you...
They will threaten you... Narcissists will threaten to ruin your life...
Narcissists will threaten to physically harm you... Narcissists will threaten just to hurt you overall...
The narcissist will swear revenge on you... Narcissists would threaten to destroy your
business. Narcissists will threaten to lose your job. Narcissists will threaten to destroy your family,
and your friends! Narcissists will threaten people to deal with you...
Narcissists will threaten anything and everything that will make your life utterly MISERABLE.
Sadly I've had Narcissists tell me pretty much all of the above. Luckily if you've gone no contact
and no longer see them as well, you won't have to hear this disgusting abuse coming your way...
It is mostly just words, but even if they do say whatever they say to threaten you with
show the texts and the emails if that's the only way that they can contact you
because you shouldn't take phone calls to see them, and show them to the authorities.
Immediately I would also suggest trying to get a restraining order if they keep coming round
as well. If they turn up to your house to your flat, your apartment, Do Not Answer!
I remember feeling anxious leaving my own home, due to the disgusting threats an ex-narcissist made
towards me! And I was thinking "oh my god am i going to be okay? They're threatening to do this
this, that, whatever!?" But when I realized it was all just words and lies because narcissists ARE liars
because they're overreacting due to the fact that I'd left, I slowly but surely safely managed to go
on with my life, and you can too! Because all these threats are just EMPTY. It's just rage. Just expect
to hear these awful disgusting things. But do not be afraid to tell someone you confide in
or an authority about such awful threats, if they are really bad as well, and if you do not react and
carry on living your life without them safely, I assure you that you have NOTHING to worry
about. The narcissist is a BIG FAT LIAR, a con artist, so everything they say is a LIE!
Trust me here, you have nothing to be afraid of!
#4 = They will beg you for forgiveness!
So once they have finished abusing you, raging you, threatening to make your life a further
living hell, they will begin the weirdest stage of all = they will beg you for forgiveness.
Yes this actually does happen, trust me! The narcissist will tell you how sorry they are, how stupid
and foolish they've been. It'd be like something out of a movie like you know it's like "oh my god
I get it now!" Do not forget narcissists are like actors and they are liars and manipulators...
Yes they can mold and act into whatever they want, in order for them to GET whatever they want from
people! So if they're telling you everything you want to hear (assuming you're in dialogue with them)
which you really shouldn't be, you are leading yourself down a trap door! Yes you're going
down into a trap, and that trapdoor will lead you right back into their arms, where you think that
they've "changed" they've "got it" they've "understood" and "oh my god we're so in love, and so happy!"
It's a NEW relationship, I feel reborn!" WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! It's all an act, they are trying to lure you
back into their dark web, like the Pied Piper or a predator. It's the sickest and most twisted game
that they play. They try to convince you and assure you that they've genuinely "changed" it's not true...
it's a LIE. They will try to convince you and even tell you ALL the things you told them in the past
For Example = in the past we told them "stop drinking, stop going out," whatever they'll say "I need to stop
drinking...I've stopped drinking...I stopped going out..." It's all an ACT, it's all a LIE, do not fall for it!
I want you to laugh to yourself though, when they beg for you to forgive them, and the reason why
is because you will SEE this coming, and you will not believe just how alike most narcissists are,
and how alike they all act, and it's pretty evident!
#5 = Consistent Hoovering. They will be hoovering you! So once the rage, the abuse, threats, and the begging
for forgiveness, and all of this other crap has occurred, the narcissist WILL consistently hoover
you! In particular if you've left them, and you've left talking to them, you've remained no contact!
So what is hoovering? The term hoovering comes from the brand name vacuum "hoover!" A vacuum
sucks up things. Manipulators like narcissists will try to SUCK you back after you've got OUT
or even after THEY discarded you! The goal of hoovering = is to USE any means necessary
to get you back under their control! They will never stop doing this after you leave them!
I remember when I got emails (the only formal contact I allowed with ex-narcissist) saying how
wonderful our relationship was, and how a dark much of a dark place they were in, and I was "blowing
things out of proportion" whatever. I was told I was "perfect," I could "never be replaced," so hurt they
are they "can't live without me, they can't go on without me!" At's all a manipulation tactic called
HOOVERING. Granted right after you left them or are leaving them there will be a period
where you feel down downright miserable. You will feel dejected, you will feel hurt, you will feel
so much in pain, and you forget who you are. You've forgotten like "who was I before I met this person?"
Look breakups with narcissists are awful, because there's just no closure at all! However that is
when you are emotionally at your weakest, and the hoover attempts will be at their very strongest!
You must remain no contact. Do not see them. Do not visit them. Do not respond to them. Do not
talk to them. Do not fall for these traps. Based on my professional experience, you will have six
months initially of hell in your healing period, in your grieving period, and in your recovery, but
I assure you, that you will recover! Things will get better and it does get easier. Just stay faithful
be careful, be safe. I assure you everything is going to be fine, trust me, and thanks for watching!