(playful music)
- All right guys, so I recently sent my dog's DNA
to a dog DNA science place
where they figured out what DNA my dog has,
and I wanted to see how legit this dog DNA place was.
So what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna swab my DNA,
I'm gonna send it to the dog center,
and I wanna see if I have dog DNA.
Maybe I'm like half poodle, with this hair.
Let's see if I'm a dog.
(dramatic music)
(playful music)
All right, so what I need to do now,
I need to swab my mouth, and then send away my DNA.
♪ You want it girl ♪
♪ Don't try to hide it ♪
♪ All my homies with your friends ♪
♪ Yeah we came invited ♪
- That's my DNA on there.
(playful music)
So in a couple weeks or months,
I'll know if I'm a dog.
(dramatic music) (barking)
So I just realized before I send the package,
I have to create a little dog profile for myself
so they know what dog they're getting DNA from.
So what do you call your dog?
Cutiebooty.
Cutiebooty?
How do you spell booty, with a T, not a D, right?
Cutiebooty, they're gonna think it's so weird
that they're testing it, 'cause now whenever I get
the DNA back, all the emails are gonna be like
cutiebooty's DNA is now updated.
So is cutiebooty male or female?
This cutiebooty, male.
Tell us something fun or unique about cutiebooty.
A lot of people think cutiebooty is different,
but cutiebooty doesn't care
because cutiebooty is cutiebooty.
So I still have a couple characters left.
I only used 110 out of 500,
so I'm gonna write one more sentence.
Cutiebooty is so (droning)
cute.
Is cutiebooty already neutered or expected to be neutered?
This cutiebooty, not neutered.
Right, I'm not neutered, I don't think so.
That's it, profile's made,
cutiebooty, let's do this baby,
let's figure out what kind of dog I am.
(dramatic music)
All right guys, so it has been a month,
and I just got an email.
The DNA results are in.
I'm about to open up the email
and see what kind of dog I am.
This is all I've been thinking about,
this whole time, I haven't been able to focus
on anything except for the fact that
I might be half dog, or 10% poodle,
or 5% Labrador, or 72% Husky,
or 100% cockapoodle, or 4% Yorkie,
or maybe 7.5% Corgi.
I could be any of those things,
and I'm gonna figure that out right now.
(tense music)
(bubble pops)
Damn it, damn it, fine.
DNA tests are a real thing, they're accurate,
dog DNA tests aren't a scam.
It said, the saliva wasn't able to be processed,
something went wrong.
What went wrong is that I gave them human DNA.
Damn it.
I guess what I should do is do some research
and give you some sort of information
as to why the results came out the way they did
and why this video turned out pretty boring
and I'm not a dog, so let me see.
(playful music)
Yeah, I couldn't figure out how the DNA stuff works,
I spent a couple hours researching, I have no idea.
So what I'm gonna do is actually I'm gonna call someone
from the company to get specific answers
as to how the process works.
Thanks so much for jumping on this call.
I just got the results back
and it said that I have zero dog in me,
that they actually couldn't analyze my DNA,
so I was wondering if you could talk a little bit
about how the DNA is tested
and why my DNA didn't match up with any dog's.
- So the DNA is tested with what we call a micro array.
So it's this chip, and we put DNA on the chip
and we put dog DNA on the chip,
and the thing about DNA is that it's a double strand,
so if you have one strand, if you get a matching strand,
it sticks together.
So if you put dog DNA on our dog chip,
it's gonna match what we put on it,
and it's gonna tell us what version of different alleles
across the genome your dog has.
If you put human DNA on it,
it's not gonna match anything on the chip,
it just washes right through
and then we're like oh, we didn't get any dog DNA,
your test failed.
- Humans have no, the DNA is just
completely different than dog DNA?
- Uh, pretty much.
So if you look at the genes that are coded
in the human genome versus the dog genome,
they're about 90% the same.
Of course, if you look at the individual letters
making up the genomes, they're only gonna be
about 70% the same, and when we're designing our probes,
we're looking at dozens and dozens of letters in a row.
So even though some of them are the same,
in fact, most of them are the same,
there's enough differences it just doesn't match up.
- Do you think there's any plausible chance that
a human DNA would ever just accidentally stick or match?
Or is it a pretty foolproof system?
- Uh, it's a pretty foolproof system.
So there's 200,000 plus markers on our array.
It's possible, maybe it's highly conserved reaching,
you get 10 or 20 of them that do match up,
with the human and a human test would make a result there.
We're still gonna fail that sample, right.
We want our samples to have over
99% of the chip returning results.
We're not gonna pass a sample
that only has 1% or less returning results.
- That makes sense, amazing.
Well thank you for clarifying with me that I'm not a dog.
I guess I'm fully human, I'm 100% human,
so thank you for confirming that,
and for taking the time--
- Well we didn't confirm that you're human,
we just confirmed you're not dog.
(bleep)
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