>> I spent my entire childhood thinking
that an overhand knot, where you do this,
was called a missile base.
>> A missile base?
>> Well, because it looks on your foot,
it looks like a missile command.
You got this little thing in the middle
and the lines coming on out. >> Okay.
>> Shooting the rockets out.
I always thought it was called a missile base
and nobody knew what I was talking about.
>> Yeah, wow, okay.
[deep synthetic rumble]
-- CC BY REV -- ** MODIFIED BY BIZARRE MAGIC ** [electrical pop] [gentle vinyl static]
[rising chime] >> All right Jason Murphy, there are three knots
that it seems like everybody should know.
>> I think there are probably more than that,
but we're going to tackle these three.
>> So I figured we should know one knot
to tie a rope to a thing,
another knot to tie a rope to a rope,
and another knot to make a circle that won't,
you know, kill you.
>> Oh okay.
[laughter]
>> That's not saying much, is it?
>> Yeah, how to make ropes that won't kill you.
>> A circle, a loop, that will stay a loop
without tightening or anything.
That's what I'm saying.
>> You had a story about just such a loop.
>> So back in high school, my best friend was an Eagle Scout
and he told me about being at camp
and they're doing a giant tug-of-war
and they realize, "Oh wait, if we had somebody
who could actually get inside a big bowline knot,"
that's one of those loops that doesn't get tighter,
"he could be an anchor and pull back."
>> He could have it around him and it doesn't cinch around his waist,
and stuff like that, yeah. >> Exactly, exactly.
They do that, they start winning.
The other side is like, "Hey, what are they doing?
Ah, they got like a loop tied at the end."
They did not know how to make a bowline knot.
So they just made a loop, and so as dozens
of these kids are pulling apart, it's just [scrunch].
>> Suddenly, the best tug-of-war ever!
>> No! It was not!
>> It's like a Final Destination movie.
>> They were killing him, it was awful!
This is why you have to know the bowline.
Here, grab a rope.
[simple chimes set to the text] [vinyl static]
You're going to make a loop.
Now here's the thing, if you just do this,
you're going to see that it doesn't make a loop
because it's a synthetic rope.
So as I'm rolling this around,
I'm also rolling in my hands, kind of twisting it.
So you're making just a over-top loop.
So it's like this, now you've got a over-top loop, right?
>> Got it. >> Now, you're going to do
another over-top loop,
so you're sort of rotating it on there,
and you can hang it on there so you get
this pretzel formation, right? >> Yeah.
>> Now you're going to take the very bottom of it,
you're going to go up through the center of the pretzel.
You're going to go around this top part.
And then you're going to go down through the pretzel.
If you just tighten this one thing down,
it's just going to make the loop smaller
and smaller and smaller, right?
>> Oh yeah and you don't want that.
>> Correct, so what you're going to do is,
you're going to grab both of these
and what you're really going to do
is you're going to kind of tug these two apart.
So if you pull the one up, you can see it gets half tight.
And then you pull the other side down,
it gets all the way tight.
And once it gets tight,
you can pull the whole thing
and now you have a loop that will not constrict around you.
>> I got it!
>> Yeah!
So this is important if you have it,
I don't know, over a tree or something
and you want to get your foot in there.
>> Yeah. >> You can hang right on there.
>> Because if you do this with something like say,
a noose, it's just going to tighten on your foot
and it's going to be a huge problem.
>> Correct, or in a tug-of-war.
>> Or in a tug-of-war. [laughing]
It will cut someone in half!
>> All right, which one did you learn?
[simple chimes set to the text] [vinyl static]
>> This is the sheet bend and it's usually used
for tying two lengths of rope together,
often if they are of different diameters.
Now these are the same type of rope
so they're the same diameter but it still works quite well.
>> Okay.
>> JASON: You just take the end of one of your pieces,
>> BRIAN: Okay.
>> JASON: And you make a little bite in it just like that.
>> A little shepherd's crook? >> Yup.
Take your other end, thread it through right here.
>> Yup, from underneath. >> There you go.
>> BRIAN: Yup, okay.
>> JASON: And now wrap it around like that.
>> So going down the back part? Got it, okay.
>> Bring it all the way around like that
and then go up and under right here.
>> BRIAN: Okay, so I don't go back in the eye.
I only go through the eye once.
>> JASON: Once, correct.
>> BRIAN: Wait is that it‽
>> JASON: That's it.
>> BRIAN: Oh, so now I just grab the two sides--
>> JASON: And you pull.
>> Wait, is that right?
Is that?
Yeah, and then the tighter it pulls...
>> Yep.
>> -the more solid it becomes.
>> And that is a sheet bend. >> Well that was easy.
>> Super easy. >> Sheet bend?
[vocalized affirmation]
>> All right, so we got a loop that doesn't constrict.
We linked two knots together, and I guess the third is--
>> The buntline hitch.
>> The buntline hitch!
[simple chimes set to the text] [vinyl static]
Theoretically, I learned this one but I don't know.
So this is if you want to tie it
around a branch or something.
So imagine you've got the tight end and the loosey end.
The loosey end goes around,
then up through the eye,
and then you're going to just tuck it in
before that gets tight,
and pull it down
just like so.
Now it will pull tight, but as you pull it down
it'll get totally solid.
Now you can dangle whatever you want from a tree.
>> Shark goes into the hole, shark comes out of the hole.
Jaws?
>> Oh no. >> Remember Jaws, when they're? Okay.
>> Can I confess I've never seen all of Jaws?
[in despair] >> Oh...
>> That might have been one of the easiest
Modern Rogues we've ever done.
You always say, "This should be really quick and easy."
>> And then it takes all day.
>> We just learned knots and then they worked.
Now in the comments, everyone is just like,
"That's not a bowline!
This is a bowline!"
>> Yeah, I'm just happy none of us ended up like,
losing a limb because of loss of circulation.
>> I'm just happy I get to forget them now,
[laughing] because I know I can find them on YouTube.
>> It'll all be gone.
>> You want to learn a magic trick?
>> Let's do it.
♪♪
Wait,
we're in the woods.
Brian's got rope and says,
"You want to learn a magic trick?"
[hectic chimes] [vinyl static]
>> So you know I spent my first five years in magic
running sound for a magician who did a stage illusion show
for kids and charities?
You know about this? >> I didn't.
>> Yeah, I haven't thought about this routine in a decade.
I'm going to see if I can remember it.
I'm going to try to perform >> Okay.
>> this script as I remember him saying it.
So pretend you're-- pretend you're children.
>> Okay.
[stammering]
>> How do kids do? >> How do kids act?
>> They just wiggle and ask to go pee.
[laughing]
>> I have to pee!
>> You know when I was a kid, my mom, she said to me.
She said, "Brian,"
She called me that because...
that's my name.
She said, "You need to learn how to tie your shoes, dude."
They called me "dude."
They call me Magic Dude now.
MD for short.
Makes them feel better with their friends at the club.
The way I learned to tie my shoes is by doing it
over and over and over and over and over and over
and over and over and over and over and over and over again.
Because when you do something over and over and over
and over and over again, you get good at it
because you've done it...
a lot.
I got good at tying my shoes.
You want to see how fast I can do it?
>> Yeah. >> All right, ready, watch.
Watch...
♪ [jazzy music] ♪
Watch.
It's not much, but it makes it tax deductible.
My accountant loves that joke.
[laughing]
Ready, one, two, three.
[sploots] Pretty fast, right?
>> Yep. >> But you know what I hate
is when one shoelace goes through one loop
and the other shoelace goes through the other loop
and it gets pulled tighter and tighter and tighter
and tighter and tighter until you end up
with a great big old ball of yucky mess.
That's what I call it
because I don't like the expression
[obnoxiously] "NOT!"
[laughter]
But I figured out a way to get rid of
great big old balls of yucky mess.
Hold out your hand, palm up like that.
Here we go, close your hand right on top.
Nice and tight.
Boom!
Just like that, totally vanished.
I can't believe I still remember that routine!
All right, I'm totally going to teach this to you,
but we're going to do it over on the Scam Nation channel.
So there will be like a link thing
and they can come learn to tie their--it's uh...
>> Do I have to do all the Dad jokes?
>> Yes.
>> Oh, okay.
>> [laughter] You must.
>> I'm going to steer into that curve, man.
>> Thank you to C.J. Johnson for teaching all of that.
[laughter]
[quieter] For all I know, it's probably not even pronounced "bow-lin."
>> That's how the British dude was pronouncing it
so you sound erudite.
>> Ah! Well thank you.
>> Did you almost do a leprechaun thing there for a second?
[exaggerated Irish accent] >> Ah, that's none of your [bleep]ing business, is it?
[laughter]
I'm going to eat my gold and [bleep] my Lucky Charms!
[wistfully] >> Is that how they're made?
>> Yes.
>> They're delicious, I love leprechaun [bleep]!