Today on the H3 report - RiceGum goes after Hila Klein
"I think this fool is depressed or whatever because his girl be just so wack. like I'm sorry
someone has to say it." More like rice *scum*. Gottem!
"Monotone Monica over here, *retard noise* nah I'm just kidding I don't know her name, but like for real, she's just so boring."
Next up what's going on with these yellow thumbnails. You've seen them all over YouTube: it's Genius
Meme-ing on everybody.
And finally, YouTube has finally addressed the trending issue. Everybody has been complaining
We want to see more wholesome real representative videos on trending of creators
and YouTube has responded resoundingly with
Obese man bathing in trough today on the epic return (Turn down your volume)
Today! On the epic retuuuurn of the H3
*coughing*
Report!
The first story of the day comes from RiceGumby now, I'm not gonna be calling him RiceGum anymore
I'll be calling him RiceGumby because just like the toy Gumby
he's soft, enjoyed by ten year olds, and
forgotten about by most people. Now in rice Gumby's response video
He in the thumbnail calls Hila a liar, which is based on really nothing at all
And then he goes on to call me a
"hippocrip"
Is it possible that RiceGum actually thinks that hypocrite is "hippocrip"? Yo, how is everybody doing man?
It's kind of cold in my room. So I had to do what I had to do
But look at this dude, man just look at this dude
For someone who's all about flexing and showing off their wealth
I have to say, I find it a little bit hilarious that you cannot afford heating
I recommend instead of buying Louis Vuitton supreme jackets possibly investing in a furnace. He's just a big hater
I guess it makes sense because he says he's like depressed or something which really doesn't make sense
why he's depressed honestly because like I mean money isn't everything and fame isn't everything but like he has both of that and like
YouTube is like a dream job and people would probably want to be in his shoes so he needs to chill out
I'm really trying to think I'm not a therapist or anything and this is like towards the end of the video
So a lot of people might not even see this so I'm just gonna say how it is
I think this fool is depressed or whatever because his girl be just so wack. Like I'm sorry. Someone has to say it
But like every time his girl is in a video, bro it's just crickets.
So soldiers just walk into their house and look through their shit and find guns..
Monotone Monica over here, nah I'm just kidding, I dont know her name but like for real she's just so boring, bro
And maybe you're just bored of her or just likes surround yourself with high-energy
Girls kids like you probably can have you got the money and the clout right at the end of the day
anyways man just be happy man
so apparently RiceGumby PhD has determined that the reason that I'm depressed is
My beautiful pregnant wife, the reason that anything good has happened in my life. His main claim
Is that Hila's boring and I think really there's just only one response to that
You smell that it smells like fried rice
All I'm tryna say is
It was a mistake
I probably shouldn't've done it
and it'll never happen again
but, shit
I made the bag
Shit
So did it feel good, though?
But did it feel good, though?
I probably shouldn't've done it
and it'll never happen again
but, shit
I made the bag
Damn Gumby when you find a girl that's got moves like that then you can come at me talking about high-energy girls
I got the best girl in the frickin world
If you're gonna come after me, you better come harder than that dawg
And I didn't even have to pay her to pretend to like me
But that's okay because you just got paid two hundred thousand dollars for selling
Gambling to kids when you've wasted all that away trying to flaunt how wealthy you are
You may want to change your name from RiceGum to Just Rice
Because I'm afraid that's all you'll be able to afford to eat. But hold on
I'm not finished remember at the end where he's like yo, sorry $10 $20, okay
nothing I can really do but say sorry and give you these Amazon gift cards, so I'm sorry
it just wouldn't happen again Amazon codes 10 to
$20 just a little giveaway is the least I can do after what you know this, you know
This gentleman here called Amazon himself to check on these codes and he found out that they were redeemed
Months ago before this video was even made so RiceGum gave out used and old Amazon codes
-It's the least I can do-
RiceGum was trying to redeem himself. But ironically he had already redeemed himself months ago with his own code
I wonder if he spent them on tissues to wipe the tears away when he realized the girls
He pays to pretend like they liked him don't actually like him, GOTTEM
Hey Rice, did it feel good, though?
Next story we have Genius. Now Genius is a YouTube channel that brings on reputable
Musical talents to come explain their lyrics they've had artists like Post Malone,
Logic, 21 Savage, Joji
Rich Brian - Titans of the music industry, but one genius over at Genius decided
Hey, what if we bring on memes and it was a stroke of dare I say? Genius
And it keeps going too - you start to wonder is there something wrong with this kid was this video not edited properly
There's no sound
Right the kids got on like ten jackets for some reason like what's going on here, right? I'm intrigued.
Ooh, I love how he hits that last note he really shows off his musical mastery.
I be flossiIiiIiiin
I was like, oh Mariah Carey in the building break a glass with that voice. You know what I'm saying?
Flossin is the dance that took the world by a storm on the Internet. How are you not having a heat stroke?
First of all, I be sweatin'
I would say unless he lives on Mars. He's probably overdressed
to right
left to right
I don't think his instructions are good because I don't think I'm flossing
-right, left, right, left-
I don't think your instructions are good bro.
the first thing you want to do is spread your legs and then you want to put your arms out and then you want to
Go left to right left to right left to right
Left to right left right left right left right left left right left right left
So there you go. A lot of people are saying
Genius must be stopped. We must stop genius. I think genius must
Continue, I love it is the most entertaining stuff on the internet. Let's support them. Let's rise them up. Let's get them on trending
I want to see more yellow thumbnails
And our final story comes from YouTube
They've listened to the community's concerns and they have finally trended a video that is worthy of being there.
This one is titled
"Due to His Obesity, Casey Must Bathe Outside in a Trough"
Not a bath, not a bucket, not a barrel,
a trough. I would like to see the transcript for this video on Genius if that's possible
(Grunt)
(Primal grumble)
(Moan?)
(Gutteral moan)
I Can definitely understand the broad appeal of this video.
I...
I totally understand why this would be number 2 on trending all day and again, I'm not gonna say anything
I'm only to give praise and admiration to the
cinematography over at the TLC
For obtaining a really terrific a really good shot. I mean, this is really high-level
Cinematography because think about it
They could have put the camera up high
They could have put the camera even eye level but they just they made the editorial decision to say let's get that camera down here
You know
To get that really cinematic really beautiful. Lush shot. I actually learned recently that TLC stands for Top Level Cinematography
They say that videos on trending should be broadly appealing, so this definitely hits all those marks
I've always wanted to watch that an overweight guy rinse himself in a trough with a Carl's jr. Cup
Have you not?
Editors note: You do not want to know what this sounds like. Trust me
I need this help a little bit to clean myself
y'know...
WIPING
just
M Y A S S
Alright
Okay, well
I've seen all I need to see here, thanks for watching everybody. I hope you enjoyed speaking of Hilas company
She's got a new drop out, the love collection. You've got the Bubble Gum Hoodie, the Pastel Polar Fleece. Love Face Hoodie.
What is Love Crew Pullover, Love Beanie and so much more.
Yes, the most boring girl on the planet over at teddyfresh.com. If you think you can browse the website without falling asleep
It's teddyfresh.com. Thanks everyone for watching and see you next time