Hello everybody. My name is Markiplier, and welcome to 50 Questions in 5 Minutes.
I have 50 questions, that have been assembled from you guys, that I have not seen.
I also have a shock collar on my neck.
Now here's how this is gonna work, and here's how this shock collar makes sense.
I have only five minutes to answer 50 questions that gives me 6 seconds-
-per question in addition to reading the question itself. If I answer a question in time,
I'm all good, but if I don't answer a question either because
I can't answer it, I don't know the answer, or I don't want to answer it,
I have to shock myself, and then every time I have to shock myself
I have to increase the value of this shock. It goes from 1 to 15,
and at 15 it is a deadly shock indeed, and if I don't manage to answer all 50 questions,
then I have to shock myself
increasingly for every question that I did not answer.
All right. if you're ready, I'm ready.
3, 2, 1, go.
Which of your ego is your favorite? Uh, Warfstache!
What do you do to tackle procrastination?
Um, I tell myself I'm an asshole, and I just get to work.
When will you let Chica get married, or is she is strong independent doggo?
I'd let her get married if she found true love, but I'd have to test out that boy dog.
Are you a virgin?
No.
Where are thy feet?
Right here.
Should I drop my math class? No joke, seriously debating it.
How can you drop your math class?
Are you in high school ? If you can-- If you are in high school that means you can't drop it. If you're in college then-
Go for it, if it's not pertaining to your major.
Is water technically soup?
No.
Do you remember the faces of your victims?
Who are my victims? I-- no?
What is the lowest note you can sing?
Your voice is pretty deep so I think you can hit really low notes.
*Singing:* oooooo
What is the highest note you can reach?
AAAAAA *very high pitched*
What is the source of your power, and where can I get it?
Uh, from the moon! Worshipping the moon monsters!
Where do babies come from?
It comes from penis going in the vagina. It's ejaculating sperm.
Do you ever think you might be too hard on yourself?
What are you talking about? I'm wearing a shock collar!
Who killed Markiplier? I did!
If one synchronized swimmer drowns during a show, do the others drown as well?
Only if they're dedicated enough.
What's your fursona?
I don't have one.
Oh, God. Increasing difficulty.
How do you get over someone you never even dated?
T-Then what's to get over? You haven't even dated them yet?
G-Get it over your own ego.
Uh, how do you get so uncontrollably thicc?
uHH
well, UH
I'm gonna-- *shock* oW
When's the last time you showered and why?
Yesterday, because I worked out for two hours.
You live in Cali, right? Yes.
Does Lightning McQueen buy life insurance or car insurance?
I-I can't answer that. ow
Okay, are you okay, dude? No!
I'm wearing this shock collar! And shocking myself for video views!
Is pee in the balsies? No it's not.
Ah, if you'll observe right here, this is the proboscis.
What would be your perfect date?
uHH, me, looking in a mirror, with a dinner that I made.
If you have to estimate it how much pasta could you fit in your house?
uHH, a million boxes!
What's your favorite flavor profile? Are you a sweets guy, or savory, or salty?
I don't believe in flavor profiles.
I think they were made up by the government for a nutritional guideline that doesn't exist!
Can you be my senpai ?
Already am.
Let's see. Have you ever read a fanfic?
Every day.
Are you planning on moving out of LA any time?
Thought about it a million times.
I'm so indecisive. I kind of hate myself.
Is life really worth living? That's not for me to decide.
My life is. Maybe yours isn't.
How long is your dick?
Oh, God.
Do you have a big penor?
God.
What does it mean that I shock my-- I'm refusing to answer that question,
not out of- because I have a small penor,
my penor is humongous !
and.. * mark why *
god whatever
Are you proud of Ethan? No.
Do you handle thots? How do you handle thots?
I thunkle 'em real hard
I'm sorry.
What is the most expensive thing you've broken ?
My sanity.
Why do men have nipples?
What are they for? Why are they there?
Every human is a genetic template starting with female,
male being male is-is-is a change that happens to the fetus in the womb?
Whatever, it's the Y chromosome. I don't know because because we can produce there. We're all just bio--
fucking..
oH GOD.
How does one get a girlfriend? Uh ask.
How deep is an anus? It goes out your mouth.
What time is it on the moon? T--moon's- time is a social construct. There's no people on the moon, so there's no time.
Let's see, how do you feel about the minor fan backlash about doing videos your way instead of doing the videos the audience's way?
Who gives a fuck? You do videos that make you happy
If people don't like it, then people aren't gonna watch it. Mark, what's the happiest you've ever felt? The first day I got Chica.
If you could be friends with a character from any game, who would you choose?
Myself, in a fan game, because I'm awesome.
Let's see, can you fit your whole fist in your mouth? Oh, I just punched myself in my lip
I just bit my lip real hard. I think I'm gonna bleed!
It's okay, keep going. If you had eight hands,
would you grab your significant other's butt with all eight hands at the same time or with each hand eight times?
Uhhh I don't know!
Owww, god!
What's your favorite thing about LA? I don't know! Convenient food everywhere!
Boobs or ass? Ass
Would you ever host a podcast? Yes.
Would you ever re-dye your hair a crazy color? No.
You got the stuff? Oh, I got the stuff all right, baby.
Is that it?
AYYYY! *fanfare*
I did i-
YEAH!
Ow! I punched myself in the face! I am bleeding!
Owie
Mmm
That hurt, and that hurt. Pretty much all of it hurt, but I answered the questions as best I could.
This has been 50 Questions in 5 Minutes.
I managed to get through all of them in the appropriate amount of time and with the appropriate sanity left.
Is there just blood all over my teeth?
Well, that's what happens when you try to rush through life like that. So just as a lesson. I only taste blood.
If you want to see me do this again with more questions,
let me know down in the comments below. If you've got more questions that you want me to answer and that don't involve me punching
myself in my teeth,
let me know as well. Thank you everybody so much for watching
Let me know what you thought of this, and as always I will see you in the next video!
Buh-bye!!