- Hey you, my name is Thomas TomSka Ridgewell
and today I would like to introduce you to myself.
For the past couple of years,
I've been trying to regain a sense of sentimentality
and I've been diving deep into my past
to better understand myself and how I got to where I am.
Today I'd like to share with you
another chapter in the complete history of me.
At 10 years old,
I was accepted into King's College Prep School.
Which was a very expensive private school.
So big up to my mum for footing that bill.
I was no longer bullied for being a disruptive student.
Instead, I was bullied for being poor and chubby, damn it.
Because of my weight,
a teacher calls me Thomas Squidgewell.
And soon Squidgewell or just Squidge
becomes my accepted nickname.
While hiding away from bullies in the school library,
I start reading Gary Lawson comics.
And he becomes my first comedic inspiration.
It wasn't all bad though,
I made a handful of equally naughty friends.
None of them were girls though
because there were only three in my school year.
My neighbor Johnny introduces me to Super Smash Bros,
and, oh, oh my,
this is my life now.
My parents sent me to woodworking classes,
but the most creative I get
is attaching a Digimon step counter to a jigsaw.
I start selling overpriced contraband sweets and fireworks
at school out of a tackle box.
I genuinely think I had the potential
to be a great drug dealer.
The fact that I started collecting BB guns at this point
is completely unrelated.
On September 11th, 2001,
I called a friend and asked if World War three is starting.
He replies, "I do not know man, I'm 11."
One day at school my friend Rubin shows me a webtoon
by Tom Deslongchamp.
And I have no idea what I'm looking at but I instantly know
that this is what I wanna do for a living.
Thinking I wanna be an animator,
I start animating in Microsoft PowerPoint.
That's not an animation program, little Tom.
We moved from our home in Cambridge to a town,
less than two miles away.
I finally get a computer in my bedroom
and instantly sign up to animation Communities,
like Newgrounds, Sticksuicide,
and Smosh under the username, Squidgeon.
But mostly I play Neopets.
A lot of Neopets.
My parents were very concerned about
the amount of time I was spending on the computer,
and I told them it was teaching me the basics of economics.
I leave private education,
and relocate to Cottenham Village College
to be closer to my cousin.
Finally, I wont bullied for being the poor kid.
Oh God.
Now I'm being bullied for being the private school kid.
Why won't it stop?
I upload my first ever animation to smosh.com
a terrible one minute cartoon called, "New camera"
Inspired by the movie "school of Rock"
I start playing bass guitar.
I get banned from Sticksuicide for being too annoying,
and I return as Darksquidge only to get banned again.
But it's there that I meet an animator called Edd Gould
and I pester him into being my friend.
Ding dong its puberty.
My voice breaks overnight,
I develop a severe acne and I discover porn.
Except when I was like 13, 18 year old girls look super old.
so whole lot of hentai.
Puberty also brings a nasty temper.
And I often break things just to vent my anger.
I make my first ever voice acting appearance
in Edd's cartoon, "Bendy Sticks Seven".
- Who are you?
- That is not important.
- A friend shows me a weebl cartoon,
which makes my first pie very exciting.
Speaking of friends, I've awkwardly inserted myself
into a couple of groups at my new school.
I'm pretty annoying and no one wants me there,
but sucks to be them.
Oh, oh, I fall in love with my best friend
and I'm convinced she'll love me back,
if I'm a nice enough guy.
Oh dear.
And all of a sudden.
This probably isn't helped by me learning how women work,
exclusively through cheesy munger.
We got a dogo, his name is Dudley.
Which was actually gonna be my name,
before my mom intervene.
I join another animation community called, The Lock Legion
and start uploading animations
under the username Dark Squidge Lock.
What does that mean?
No one knows.
But it's here that I meet another animator called,
Ben Smallman aka CloudLock aka Oneshort.
Tom from Eddsworld makes his first appearance,
and I release my first ever live action video which is
very high brow entertainment.
At this point in my life
I don't know the difference between Smirnoff Ice
and Smirnoff Vodka.
So I think I'm a pretty hardcore drinker, I'm not.
A webtoon called Bonus Stage,
introduces me to scar music and I love it.
And I also totally rip off bonus stages Art Style.
I go to my first ever scar show to see real big fish
and very quickly discover what a mosh pit is,
and why I should never be in one.
I try shaving for the first time and
I hate it.
Never again.
I get my first and only job as a part-time cleaner
at my school.
Five pounds a day baby.
I also have my first ever sexual experience with a woman,
over webcam.
And let's just ignore that I'm 15 and she's 30.
Edd gets diagnosed with cancer
and I hold myself personally responsible
because I believe it's punishment from God,
because I masturbate too much.
I am completely not joking.
Religion is one hell of a draw.
I prayed to God and promised to never masturbated again,
if Edd's cancer goes away.
Again, I am completely not fucking joking.
(upbeat music)
♪ Kingdom of the dinosaurs ♪
♪ Rip off your face ♪
♪ Of the dinosaurs ♪
♪ Kingdom of the dinosaurs. ♪
In later news though, my obsession
with scar music only grows.
I start wearing checkers,
because that's a scar thing apparently
and Tom Ska becomes my username.
Following Edd I make an account
on a new video sharing website called YouTube.
Prom rolls around I don't have a date
because I have three platonic friends
who immediately distanced themselves from me
after secondary school ends.
But I meet an artist on a website called SheezyArt
and soon I have my first girlfriend.
Let's ignore that I'm 16 and she's 19.
(upbeat music)
First relationship takes place
almost exclusively through MSN Messenger.
Where I make my own emoticons because I'm super cool.
I'm finally free of secondary school though,
and my exam results are terrible.
Remember those customer emoticons I made,
well, I've just turned them into
a web comic called Asdf comics.
I started attending Long Road sixth form.
Which is actually the first time I ever joined a school
on the first day.
Which makes it a lot easier to make friends.
I study English language, Photography, Film Studies
and Media Studies,
because I know I want to be a filmmaker now.
I make an entirely new group of equally nerdy, autistic
and passionate friends.
And we call our little gang, Cakebomb.
I upload my first ever video to YouTube called.
Tom Ska's Day Out.
In anticipation of actually meeting my internet girlfriend,
I lose a lot of weight
and I'm almost in good shape for once.
Oh boy.
My first driving lesson.
A child runs into the road and I almost kill them.
Future driving lessons are now canceled.
I fly to New York to meet Abby for the first time.
We meet in the Manga section of a bookstore
and it's definitely one of the highlights of my life.
We share my first kiss on the plane ride
back to her place in far West New York.
And I get the worst blue balls I've ever experienced.
Because if you recall, I'm going dry for God.
Beside from that,
I have a wonderful time and it's genuinely very wholesome.
- No, no, no.
(indistinct)
- On the flight back to England,
I'm so sad that I distract myself by brainstorming
a new video idea I've had called, Hurst of Movie.
Back home, I turn every piece of schoolwork,
into an excuse to make YouTube videos with my friends.
Honestly, this period of my life will always be remembered
as the simplest and happiest times.
Spending time with friends, making videos for fun,
it was pure and it was good.
Also, Edd's cancer went into remission
and I immediately started masturbating again.
I'm sorry, God.
It was just too hard.
Meanwhile, my parents marriage falls apart.
And then they get back together, crazy kids.
Then Abby comes to visit.
- Were too good at this.
We all go down to London to visit a web comic convention,
and while we're there,
one of the attendees asks us to voice in their webtoon.
When I got home, I write a blog post
about how much that webtoon sucks.
And that's how I met Eddie Bowley.
Sorry, Eddie.
I attend an open day at the University of Lincoln
and, oh look! There's Chloe Dungate.
We wont become friends for two more years.
Her only brother applying to Lincoln
so it's a good job that I get in,
with the bad minimum grades.
One day while blasting new metal
and playing Halo three with my best friend,
I realized that this is the happiest I've ever been
and I permenently commit that moment to memory.
My relationship with Abby, however, comes to a close.
Because over two years of long distancing
is really, really hard.
Driven by sadness once again,
I finish writing asdf movie.
And when a 13 year old called James emails me
and asks if he can animate something for me,
well, you get asked of movie.
Oh, boy, 3000 subscribers on YouTube,
I've picked.
I move out of my parents' house
and up to Lincoln to study Media Production at University.
Both "Asdf Movie" and "Eddsworld" start
getting serious traction on YouTube.
And I have fans now, what?
I've also developed a pretty huge crush
on my best friend's sister.
And when he finds out it almost cost us our friendship.
So I stopped talking to her altogether.
Hell I even go as far as
to delete all my social media accounts.
I'm a ghost.
A weird pseudo relationship
with my other best friend takes its place,
and soon I've lost my virginity.
I wasn't really ready for it,
but I was in a bad place at the time
and kinda just went with it.
In tandem my behavior as a human being takes a nosedive,
and I start treating people, especially women, awfully.
I'm manipulative and creepy,
and it's inarguably a shameful part of my history.
However most of this behavior comes to an abrupt end
when I enter a much healthier and happier relationship
with a computer science student called Amy.
Also I've started putting all my time and energy
into making comedy sketches for YouTube,
which is probably why I passed my first year of University,
only 1% above a fail.
And, breathe.
Thanks for listening to this part of my life.
And I will see you again at some point in the future
for the third and final chapter in this series.
TomSka, out.
(upbeat music)