SO, WE'VE BEEN DOING A LOT OF POLLS ON THE SHOW LATELY,
BUT WE HAVEN'T GIVEN YOU AN UPDATE IN A WHILE SO I
WANTED TO GIVE YOU AN UPDATE.
THIS IS FUN, I LIKE THIS.
THIS IS KIND OF A TOUGH ONE THAT WE ASKED THE OTHER DAY, ON A
REALLY SERIOUS STORY ABOUT CIVILIAN DEATHS, BECAUSE UNDER
THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION, CIVILIAN DEATHS DURING THE
BOMBINGS HAS INCREASED EXPONENTIALLY.
HE SAID HE WOULD MURDER THEIR FAMILIES.
BUT IT WAS A REAL QUESTION, "WOULD YOU EXECUTE THREE
CIVILIANS IF THERE WAS A 50% CHANCE YOU COULD TAKE OUT A
TERRORIST COMPOUND?"
GRANTED, THAT TERRORIST COMPOUND COULD KILL A LOT OF PEOPLE.
NO, 15.5% SAYING THEY WOULD TAKE OUT THE COMPOUND, 84 15% SAYING
THAT THEY WOULD NOT DO IT IF IT MEANT KILLING THREE CIVILIANS.
AND TRUST ME, WE'VE KILLED A LOT MORE THAN THREE CIVILIANS.
WE'VE KILLED DOZENS, AND IN SOME STRIKES, HUNDREDS OF
CIVILIANS, AND NOT EVEN GOT THE TERRORIST.
I LOVE OUR AUDIENCE, I REALLY DO, BECAUSE THAT SHOWS YOU
SOMETHING ABOUT THEM, AND THE MORALS THAT ACTUALLY MATTER.
BUT ANYWAY, LET'S CONTINUE.
SO, NOW, THE NEXT ONE WAS A LOT LIGHTER.
DONALD TRUMP WAS ñ NOT THREATENING TO, HIS GOVERNMENT
IS SAYING THAT THEY ARE WHAT LET THE ISP'S LOOK THROUGH OUR
INTERNET HISTORY.
AS OF THE LAWS THAT THE REPUBLICANS PASSED, THEY
WILL GET TO SEE IF YOU WANTED ONE SITES, OR WHATEVER.
SO WE ASKED IF DONALD TRUMP SHOULD RELEASE HIS BROWSER
HISTORY.
UNSURPRISINGLY, 96.5% SAID YES.
I LIKE THE 3.5% THAT SAID NO.
DO YOU THINK TRUMP WATCHES PORN?
YES.
I PAUSED FOR A SECOND BECAUSE HE IS A WEIRD DUDE, HE DOESN'T
DRINK ALCOHOL AND HE IS UP ALL NIGHT, BUT THINK ABOUT ALL
THE SEXUAL STUFF HE HAS DONE IN THE PAST.
HE'S NOT VERY GOOD AT COMPUTERS THOUGH, HE HAS HIS TWITTER
THING, BUT OTHERWISE HE HAS TO HAVE HANDOUTS.
BUT I CAME TO THE CONCLUSION YES BECAUSE HE IS A MALE HOMO
SAPIEN, SO IT IS UNLIKELY THAT HE DOES NOT WATCH PORN.
ANOTHER ONE, SHOULD THE DEMOCRATS FILIBUSTER NEIL
GORSUCH.
93.8%
SAYING YES, OF COURSE WE SHOULD FILIBUSTER NEIL GORSUCH.
THIS IS TO POINT OUT TO THE DEMOCRATS THAT FOR ACTUAL
PROGRESSIVES THIS IS NOT A CLOSE ISSUE.
AND BY THE WAY, YOU CAN SEE WHERE YOU CAN VOTE ON THE SIDE
OF ALL THESE, THE FIRST ONE WAS TYTNETWORK.COM/CIVILIANS.
WE ARE CONTINUING TO TRACK IT.
THAT LAST ONE WAS TYTNETWORK.COM/STAND, BECAUSE WE
WANT YOU TO SEE THAT IT IS NOT JUST US, REAL PROGRESSIVES
WANT YOU TO TAKE A STAND.
THE NEXT ONE, SHOULD WE HAVE 74 EIGHT TRUMP VOTER WHOSE HUSBAND
IS BEING DEPORTED?
WOW, IT'S INSANE HOW MANY PEOPLE VOTED, BUT MAN IT IS DEFINITELY
A BLEEDING HEART LIBERAL THING BECAUSE I AM IN THE NO CATEGORY
FOR SURE.
I THOUGHT THE YES CATEGORY WAS HIGH, YES SHE VOTED FOR
TRUMP, BUT IT SUCKS THAT HER HUSBAND IS BEING DEPORTED.
ANA THINKS THAT THE NO SIDE IS TOO HIGH.
I FEEL A GREAT DEAL OF STATUS FOR HER HUSBAND, BUT NOT FOR
HER, BECAUSE OF THIS LINE OF THINKING THAT HAPPENS WITH SOME
TRUMP SUPPORTERS, THAT THEY ARE SUPERIOR, THAT THEIR LIVES ARE
SUPERIOR, THAT NO ONE IS GOING TO TOUCH THEM.
MY HUSBAND WHO IS UNDOCUMENTED IS NOT A BAD PERSON, IT'S
THE OTHER UNDOCUMENTED PEOPLE THAT ARE BAD AND SHOULD GET OUT.
THAT MENTALITY DRIVES ME NUTS, AND THAT'S WHY I HAVE NO
SOMEBODY FOR THEM.
FOR THOSE WHO DO, YOU ARE BETTER THAN I AM.
THE LAST ONE WAS A FUN ONE, WHO HAS THE BEST ALIAS?
DONALD TRUMP WITH JOHN BARRON.
WAYNE TRACKER, THAT WAS REX TILLERSON'S ALIAS.
BUT THE BIG WINNER, SHOWING HOW NONPARTISAN OUR AUDIENCE IS,
THEY STILL THOUGHT ANTHONY WEINER WAS THE BIGGEST CLOWN
WITH THE ALIAS OF CARLOS DANGER, AT 82.1%.
HOW ARE YOU WANT TO COMPETE WITH CARLOS DANGER?
WAYNE TRACKER IS STILL PRETTY GOOD MAN, BUT CARLOS GOT HIM.