-Ron Burgundy, everybody! Ron Burgundy!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Wow. That was some funny -- That was some funny stuff.
-Well, it must have gone well.
You invited me back over to the couch.
-That's some funny stuff over there.
-Sorry. I got a little hot under the collar about Mendes.
-Yeah, no problem. I didn't even know that you did standup.
-Oh, yes.
It's been a lifelong passion of mine for about a week now.
And I just love it. It's all about the Benjamins.
You know what I mean, Jimmy? -No.
-The Benjamins. -Yeah.
I don't know what you mean.
-You know. -No, I don't.
Uh, do you do it on tour?
-Well, I'm on tour right now.
In fact, tomorrow night I'm opening for Jerry Seinfeld
at Madison Square Garden.
[ Laughter ] -Really?
-Tickets available on Ticketmaster.
-Is that right?
-It's Jerry Seinfeld, Ron Burgundy,
and the Rolling Stones.
With special guest star KC and The Sunshine Band.
The Roots are going to be playing.
-Hey. Congratulations. That's great.
-And jazz vocalist Bobby McFerrin.
[ Laughter ]
-What a bill. What an absolute bill.
Oh, I don't want to miss that one.
-It was tough to land Bobby.
-You got him there, though. -We got him.
-You got him, man. You got him.
-I said, "I'm not doing it without McFerrin."
-Yeah, you said that?
-And they said, "Well, wait by the phone." But we got him.
But tickets are still available for tomorrow night.
Madison Square Garden.
-Madison Square Garden. A lot of people.
-Huge. It's huge.
-Dude, I have to be honest, I miss you doing the news.
-Oh. Well, thank you. -Do you miss doing the news?
-Of course I do. Of course I do. -You do. Yeah.
-Anyone who has walked away from the news game,
any former journalist who says they don't miss it is lying.
And I'm talking to you, Tom Brokaw.
Get your [bleep] together and get back on the air.
-All right. Hold on now, Ron. Hold on now, Ron.
Now just...
[ Laughter ]
Let's get back on board here. Let's talk about this podcast.
"The Run Burgundy Podcast."
Season two launched today. iHeartRadio.
iHeart.com. The app.
Where do you podcast from?
-A room.
A room with a microphone and chairs.
-Yeah. That's the setup there? -Mm-hmm.
It's myself,
my assistant and producer, Carolina,
and a bottle of Scotch.
We just keep it loosey goosey.
-Wow.
-Yeah. -Interesting.
-It's all about the Benjamins. -Yeah.
Well, you say that because every episode starts with a sponsor
on all of your episodes of the podcast.
Is there any sponsors you turn down?
-Oh, of course. All the time.
-Oh, really? -Yeah.
Jimmy, I'm not --
You know, I don't have to listen to the man. No.
No, no. So I turn things down all the time.
-Who have you turned down? -Unless they offer me cash.
-And then -- -It's all about the Benjamins.
-I'll say it, it's all about -- or the Grover Clevelands.
[ Laughter ]
He's the face of the $1,000 bill.
-Oh, is he really? -I carry thousands.
I usually walk around with thousands.
-You carry a wad of a thousand-dollar bills?
-A wad of thousand-dollar bills that people are handing me back
'cause they're like, "I can't cash this."
-Yeah. It creates more problems than it solves.
-So you hand someone a thousand-dollar bill,
and they hand it back to you?
-So, I'll get, like, a pint of milk at the grocery store.
-You go out and get a pint? -Yeah.
What is that? About -- What does that run you?
About $1.20? $1.20.
I'll slap down a Grover Cleveland.
And they'll go, "Is that fake?"
A crisp Grover Cleveland. -Crisp Grover Cleveland.
You don't even fold them. -I don't even fold them.
-You make your pockets longer
so that you don't have to fold your money.
-Right. Keep it... -Flat.
-...in a sleeve, a plastic sleeve.
And I pop it out, snap it. Grover Cleveland.
-Yeah.
-And they're like, "First of all, is this real?"
And they're like, "We can't cash this."
-"There's nothing we can do." Yeah.
-I'm like, "Can I take it, though?
'Cause all I have are thousands."
-Yeah. And do they let you have the milk?
-Usually. -Yeah.
I've listened to some of your interviews,
and they're fantastic. I'm just going to ask you,
has there ever been an interview that's gone wrong?
-There has. Two words. Kylie Minogue.
-Ooh, that's unfortunate.
-Yeah. I mean, you've been in that situation before.
Like, you know, you never want to meet your heroes.
And, boy, Kylie and I,
from the moment she came into the studio,
we just looked at each other, and it was on.
-That's terrible. I mean, Kylie Minogue?
-And she just bit me right in the ass.
-I don't even know what that means.
-And then when she was done,
she bit me in the [bleep] and balls.
So it was -- It was --
[ Laughter ]
I mean, that thing...
-What are you talking -- What are you talking about?
-We didn't even get a word out! -What are you talking about?
-It was just -- -What the hell are you --
What the hell are you talking about?
-We just -- -What do you even want?
-We just smelled each other's pheromones!
It turned into a knife fight!
-What? With Kylie Minogue?
-With Kylie Minogue. The great Kylie Minogue.
-The great Kylie Minogue.
-Great, beautiful Kylie Minogue.
She got into a knife fight? -Here's the irony.
We ended up in the emergency room covered in cuts.
I mean, I looked like The Mummy. I had bandages all over me.
And we're lying next to each other, and we're like,
"What the hell happened?"
"I think you're great."
And she's like, "I like you, too."
And we're good friends now.
[ Laughter ]
-I couldn't take you as a Kylie Minogue fan,
to be really honest.
-Oh. I was so nervous around her.
-Really?
-I think I wanted to tear her down.
-Name one of her songs. -I'll name you 50.
-I don't have time for that. -Oh, okay.
-Why don't you give me one -- Give me three songs.
-Three songs. -By Kylie Minogue.
One or three, yep.
Give me any Kylie Minogue song that you love.
-Okay. "Take Me to the River."
Um, "Hot Air Balloon for Two."
[ Laughter ] -Okay.
-And then "Sydney Nights."
-Okay. Yeah. She's from Australia. She's Australian, yes.
We only have time for a couple rapid-fire questions.
-Oh, sure, sure, sure. -Is that okay?
-Yeah. I love this.
-Favorite food. -Pop-Tarts.
[ Laughter ]
-Favorite animal? -The meerkat.
[ Laughter ]
-Favorite article of clothing? -Brass knuckles.
[ Laughter ]
-Favorite mode of transportation?
-Pass.
[ Laughter ]
-Favorite kitchen accessory? -Wait. What was that?
-Favorite kitchen accessory? -Oh, belt sander.
-[ Laughs ] Ron Burgundy.
Thank you so much for being here.
And thank you for everything you've done for this world.
-Thank you. -Ron Burgundy, everyone.
Season two of "The Ron Burgundy Podcast" launched today.