Now, Alan, why will you never eat my noodles?
[LAUGHTER]
It was bound to happen that this show
Would just become about you two
[LAUGHTER]
Because we havn't agreed on a fee, have we
If you remember we're involving people from countries beggining with "K"
Kenya?
Well, which have particular associations, perhaps, with noodles
Kent
(Steven) Kent?
[LAUGHTER]
Famous for the Kentish Pasta
No. Go east
Korea
(Steven) Thank you, Josh!
In Korea noodles, of course, are very popular
Of course
Erm. And "When will I eat your noodles?" means
"When are you getting married?"
In other words "When are you going to be throwing a party
In which you will serve noodles?"
So it's just a Korean phrase. It's like saying
"When are you gonna tie the knot?"
(Alan) Ohh.
(Steven) When am I gonna eat your noodles?
You're already married so I'm not going to eat your noodles
AND you didn't invite me you-
I did invite you, you didn't come!
(Steven) Oh you did! That's right
[LAUGHTER]
I was abroad!
Yeah, you know what you were doing
you were filming an episode of "Bones"!
Yes, I was
[LAUGHTER]
Never been so insulted in my life
I'm so sorry
I'm so- Oh, God, how embarrasing
I'm so sorry
Um, anyway, that's what it means
(Steven) Here are some other Korean phrases, then.
"The other man's rice cake always looks bigger"
[LAUGHTER]
What?
What would be the British equivalent of that?
(Phil)"The grass is always greener"
(Steven) Or as my uncle used to say
"The other man's arse is always cleaner"
[LAUGHTER]
"If there are too many ferryman on a boat
it will sail up a mountain"
(Josh) Is that just literal?
[LAUGHTER]
If they say that in North Korea
The boat is going UP a mountain
"Too many cooks spoil the broth"
(Steven) Too many cocks sp- Too many cooks spoil the broth!
[LAUGHTER]
(Imitating Freud's accent) So, Steven, tell me about your childhood
[LAUGHTER]
(Steven) Okay, heres one
"He worked as if he were tending the grave
of his wife's uncle"
That's brilliant
What would that mean?
(Josh) I'm might start using that (Alan) Not much
Yes! is the answer
Because in Korea it is your duty to tend the graves of your family
But the more distant the family, the less attention you give the grave
So all he was doing was just, basically, sprinkling a bit of water on the..
It's only his wife's uncle
Whereas his grandfather, his father or his mother he'd be putting flowers and being very attentive
(Katherine) So, like "shagging the dog"?
[LAUGHTER]
(Steven) What, really Katherine?
Is there something you want to share with us?
"Like shagging the dog"?
Yeah. Like if you don't work very hard you're just "Shagging the dog"
[LAUGHTER]
Not in this country, Madam!
[LAUGHTER]
In this country when we shag a dog we know what we're doing
And it's pretty hard work, let me tell you
(Alan) It's not as easy as it looks, I'll tell you that!
So, in Canada you have the phrase "Shagging the dog"?
Yeah
(Steven) wow
Or well, like "Shagging the sheep" if you want, or whatever
(Josh) That's not fine
Again, perfectly common practice over here, but not
[LAUGHTER]
Not considered a light or unburdensome task
It just means, like, having an easy day
[LAUGHTER]
There's a lot I have to learn about Canada
[LAUGHTER]
It's easy because with, like, a lady you have to take her out to dinner or woo her a bit
But with a dog it's just like "here boy, come on"
You say that! you say that!
[LAUGHTER]
Once he's here, most of the work is still to be done in that situation
I'm thinking it- Oh, let's move on
So, "showing off your wrinkles to a silkworm"?
[LAUGHTER]
You have found a silkworm in your underpants
[LAUGHTER]
Silkworms are pretty wrinkly
so if you show YOUR wrinkles to a silkworm
He's going to go "Nah, I can do better than that"
So it's like "teaching your grandmother to suck eggs"
Imagine how wrinkly a silkworm's knackers are
[LAUGHTER]
And finally "He disappeared like a fart through hemp pyjamas"
[LAUGHTER]
I think that one speaks for itself
(Steven) It's a Korean phrase
"Awkwardly" Basically. Embarrassingly, awkwardly, not with maximum grace