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Do you like giving compliments? Or do you like receiving compliments? I love receiving
compliments. And I'm sure you love receiving compliments too, but it’s an art to be able
to compliment another person and to make them smile from ear to ear. In this session today
with me Michelle we are going to learn different ways of complimenting somebody and also, what
are the golden rules of complimenting?
You know complimenting is so important, because it changes the person whose receiving the
compliment, It affirms their personality and touches the very core of their heart, because
they are being encouraged to be a better person then they already are, so stay with me in
this session and learn some wonderful ways of complimenting your dear one's.
Before you compliment someone, It’s really necessary that you find out about them, What
do they like? What are their interests? And what are their goals? So that you can be very
specific about the compliment. Yes this is the first golden rule of complimenting someone
that you should be very specific but why really? If you’re not specific they will feel that
you don't know anything about them and that your comment is fake, your compliment is fake,
so to make your compliment really authentic. It is necessary that you give a specific compliment.
Let me give you an example, In your workplace if any of your employee has done a really
good job on a project, you better not just say, Good work on that project. It's much
better if you tell that person; your hard work really shines through and has made a
great difference to our project. And because of your effort our company has gained great
reputation. How about a compliment in a personal relationship? If you like someone's shirt
don't just say, that’s a nice shirt. It's much better to say that, Why does that shirt
look nice on that person? So you might rather want to say, the colour of that shirt really
goes with the colour of your eyes. That's one way of complimenting of being very specific,
so that the other person is really encouraged.
Should we compliment the same person again and again? That's fine. But what if we compliment
only one person? Do you think that's a good idea? I don't think. We should really avoid
giving excessive compliments to only one person as if we are trying to gain some favours from
them. You may not think that way, but there are so many people around you, who might just
think that way, so to avoid that it’s better that you do not give excessive compliments
to one person. You should evenly spread your compliments to the people around you, who
you think deserve the compliment. Please don't fake it, be natural with your compliment,
be authentic if you feel that the person deserves a compliment. Then go ahead, If you've been
spotting that colleague of yours, whose been constantly working on the projects and who
is working before the deadlines. Then you must compliment that person. You should tell
him that you've been working really hard on this and it shows. Please make sure that you
always evenly spread your compliments throughout your workplace and other people in your personal life.
The third golden rule that I have for you is, Point to a person’s character. What
do we mean by character here? Character in the sense, what kind of a person they are?
Are they a calm person? Are they passionate person? Or is that person very courageous?
Or maybe very kind? This is what your compliment should point out. So if a person in your office
is very courageous then your compliment should definitely point that out. It should say that,
you’ve been very courageous about the recent project, because none of us was actually ready
to take it up. We were also scared about the content of the project and we did not know
if we could complete it. So this is what you can say about a person, who is very courageous.
What about a person, who is very kind? Have you spotted anyone, whose been helping other
people completing their project? Who’s been helping many people across the office? Then
yes, you must compliment them, you must tell them. That yes you’re very kind and you've
been so helpful, even to me that you've been able to help me complete this project that
I am doing. What about other characteristics? If someone is very generous that person also
you can say is very kind. So make your compliments point to the character of the person. This
is also one way of being very specific.
The final and the most important tip that I have for you is, Be authentic in your compliment.
You should not fake your compliment. Only say it, when you feel it and when you feel
that another person deserves it. Everybody has something good about them, there's something
good in them. They are all gifted; you need to find that gift in that person. That one
person, who is least, appreciated in your work place. Look for that person and compliment
them, maybe they have a great sense of humour. So you could tell that person, you always
make me laugh and that compliment will definitely make his day. And then you will also feel
very happy about it. So make sure that your compliment is very authentic and that you
do not fake it.
I hope all these golden rules will really help you compliment the people in your workplace
evenly and I also hope that you'll be very authentic with your compliment. Be natural,
smile and make others smile. It's a great idea to spread happiness and complimenting
is the best way to do that, so my challenge to you is think of that person in your life,
whom you've not complimented for long. Think what do you like about them and what is their
good quality. I'm sure they have one and go out there and compliment that person. I'm
going to see you again with a new session next time. And you please don't forget to
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