Hello Brains!
Over the last couple of episodes
Eric Tivers has taught us that it is important to
Figure out how long things take us
So that we can build a schedule that doesn't require cloning
But we're not done yet!
This week we take on the biggest
Baddest
Hurdle of all...
Sticking to that schedule!
*music*
Sticking to things is one of the hardest challenges for ADHDers
So.. I threw every possible problem I could think of at Eric
And spoiler alert!
He handled it like a BOSS
Edward
Roll the tape
Okay so
Say I've kind of figured out how long things generally take me
I've created what seems like a reasonable schedule
And then I end up in hyper-focused mode
And I want to make something take 10 hours
Instead of 5 hours
How do you break yourself out of hyper-focused mode and what do you if it's not done?
This is a strategy that I use
And I call it
"Leaving yourself a trail of crumbs"
You write the last one or two things down
That you just did and what would be the next 1 to 2 things that you would do
If you were to continue to work on it
But wait...
Isn't hyper-focus our superpower?
Why would we even want to break out of it?
The truth is..it can be a superpower
And there are plenty of times when I take advantage of it
But it does come at a cost
When we go into hyper-focus
It's sort of like driving to the grocery store
And every red light, when it turns green
we, we, we...we floor it!
We're gonna deplete our fuel
Much more quickly
So if you feel you really need this really prolonged stretch of hyper-focus
Then you have to plan longer for breaks
We have to spend longer to..to recouperate
What do I do when I don't want to do what's on my schedule?
Tell somebody!
Tell somebody right away!
Oh! So it creates some accountability essentially?
Yes!
If you want to be successful
And not feel like you're selling you soul by having to stay up crazy hours all day long
Where you're constantly overwhelmed
You sometimes have to do things that you
Don't want to do when you don't want to do it
That's where accountability is really helpful
That's also why self-care is so important
What if I-I'm, I'm supposed to sit down and edit, but then I have a really great idea for the next episode
So I wanna go... work on that instead
Use the parking lot
An idea where you have a place you quickly jot an idea
And then you get back to what you were working on
Is there ever a time when it's... a good idea to kinda like...
I've heard the term "Ride the wave"
Go, "Oh okay, I actually would really like to file everything right now and I don't normally wanna do that"
Should I take advantage of that or is it better to stick to your schedule?
There's no answer
I could say "It's never good to do that" or
"It's always good to do this" you know
So it's, so much of it is contextual
But once you get more comfortable with planning
And you learn to actually begin to trust your calendar
One of the things that you can do is say
"Oh this is such a really good idea! Let me check my calendar, let me look at the next few days..."
To see that can I actually do this?
Cause this thing that I was just working on
You know, it's due next week
Yeah, you know what? I can do this right now!
When I get really busy, that is when I do not check my schedule at all!
I am in crisis mode!
I just have to get things done!
I want you to write something down!
Spending time planning, will save you time that you can spend later
How?!
Because...
We're going to be backtracking
And sometimes having to re-do something
"Oh my gosh I have to stop right now cause I have to work on this! I was supposed to be working on this and I forgot about it"
Now how much time is it actually going to take you to
Figure out where you left off in that other project?
And you do, and then you're up till 3 in the morning
And then you're late to your next thing...
Or exhausted
And.. the cycle continues...
And apparently once you create your schedule!
It's...important to check in with it
I look at your calendar
And your to-do list
As your...GPS
For, what you're trying to do and where, where you're trying to go
If you're driving somewhere
Would you put your GPS in the trunk?
After you get the directions all set?
No! Of course not!
It would be a total waste of time to plug something into your GPS if you're not gonna use it...
Oh.
This explains a lot.
Last question!
I had somebody ask me, "How do I deal with the lazy monster?"
Okay well first of all I think that lazy is a four letter word
And yes, it actually does have four letters
But you know what I mean!
It's a shaming word
I think when you think about what you wanna do and you're having thoughts about
"Oh I-I really should do this thing"
But you're not doing that thing
That's not lazy!
That's executive dysfunction
And I think it's a really important distinction
What you're talking about is our ability to use our willpower
So don't make willpower something you have t-to use
When I used to, to play videogames at home I have a really bad case of 'onemorethingitis'
So it's like "alright one more round, one more round"
*3 hours later*
I'm still asking for one more round and it's like, that's executive dysfunction. That's break failure, right?
So I set my alarm for 30 minutes
I would connect my Nintendo Wii to a lamp timer
I set my intention before I start
And now stopping
It's already done before I started
That's how I outsource willpower
If that sounds a little too intense for you, there are other ways to outsource your willpower
Use a timed lock box to lock up other distractions like iPads and remote controls while you work
Set a timer and toss it across the room whenever you need a little extra motivation to get up off the couch
One of the ways I outsource my willpower is by using willpower.net
Which one of the brains made
The website is free to use, but if you need a little extra motivation
You can pledge to pay a certain amount every day that you miss
I now meditate every day
...Because it costs me 5 bucks if I don't
Eric's other solution to trouble with willpower
You can actually strengthen it
With self-care
If you want to get more done
Especially if it requires a lot of concentration
Go to bed earlier
Don't stay up late
If you have a big important day of focus ahead of ya
Spend some time exercising in the morning
I know from experience, self-care is usually the first thing to go out the window
When we're behind schedule
But that's how we get into this vicious cycle of staying up late
Because we're behind, having trouble getting stuff done
The next day because we're exhausted
And then staying up late because we're behind again
It's also how everything gets totally thrown off when we get say
An eye infection because we having been taking out our contacts at night
Some days, the ADHD wins
It's gonna happen
And when it does
Get some sleep
Make sure you eat something
And get back out there the next day
I'll be right there with you
That's it for this week
Eric was incredibly generous to come share some of his secrets with us
If you want more you can check out his ADHD friendly video series
With 125 of his best strategies for getting your ADHD re-wired
Links below!
Also, I'll be doing an episode on
Dealing with Distractions
Soon
Since apparently, I'm not the only one who has an issue with that
If you liked this episode, subscribe!
And if you loved this episode and wanna help me make more
Consider donating to my Patreon page, like these brains did!
Thank-you to all my Patreon brains, you're the reason I was able to go to the Chad conference
And connect with Eric and some of the other ADHD experts you'll be seeing on the show this year
You guys rock!!
Bye Brains!
Question Time!
"Did you put this on a playlist?"
Yeaahh.. I'm not the best about making playlists
Luckily our Super Moderator Superbrain is!
Subscribe to her channel for all kinds of How To ADHD playlists
However, I did make a special time management playlist that covers all the different things that tend to throw us off schedule
Did I mention perfectionism?