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fear is fascinating it's an
extraordinary teacher it serves a very
valuable purpose in your life without
fear we would do things that would get
us into a lot of trouble and likely
killed fear is not a negative or
positive thing it really depends on if
fear is serving us part we're serving
fear if we're serving fear it's not very
positive will be very negative but it's
serving you as in keeping you out of
trouble keeping you from risky
situations that could harm you are
getting killed
there is a very good thing so we don't
want to get rid of fear here's a simple
NLP process to deal with fear
first of all think of the fear and be
specific what context do you experience
the fear do you experience the fear with
someone or because of someone
what really triggers our fear it's
usually you're in a particular context
let's use a specific example at work say
you fear your boss in meetings maybe
your boss kind of makes you feel like
your dog or something it makes your
concern for your job so right now as
you're watching us think of that fear
how do you represent that fear in other
words how do you know you're
experiencing fear most people to say
like feeling of course you do but what's
triggering that field so if you can
experience the fear of that particular
situation even when you're in that
situation just by thinking about it you
have some sort of representation of that
fear so for instance if I think of a
fearful situation and let's use the
office example. then maybe I see an image of
the board meeting and I see my boss and
made into a movie and I see that image
may be right out in front of me that's
what I'm talkin about so how do you know
what triggers the fear in other words
for some people might the auditory you
might hear a voice might come from
different direction I'm going to be a
sound what triggers the fear what are
you seeing your way hearing and maybe a
combination of both seeing and hearing
but usually want to strongly together
maybe the visual stronger than sound
stronger
let's say I have an image of a movie and
I'm associate i'm inside the movie and I
can see from my own eyes
my boss in this situation and that
trigger some fear inside of me so I took
notice what we called a similar
abilities and this is the second part so
want to take notice of submodalities where
is the image in my personal space you
might see how you might see it lower to
the side let's say I see it right in
front of me and what are the colors are
isn't even in color is a black-and-white
or color is it bright on the colors Dems
are the colors really rich these are all
important things to know this is what we
call submodalities once i got a clear
understanding of what is triggering the
fear this particular image which
consequently when i'm actually in the
situation I see a similar image in front
of me for real that's what's going to
your fear for me that's what i want to
get clear about now I want to go to the
feeling of the fear so I have that fear
where my body do i feel that fear for
some of you it's going to be on your
stomach's moment you might be in your
solar plexus some of you might actually
feel it in your chest
let's say I feel my fear in the upper
part of my stomach the lower part of my
torso right below my solar plexus so
that's the mentality where is it
actually happening
does it have weight to it is it heavy or
is it light it is any weight at all
some people will experience with some
people don't for me let's say it's a
heavy feeling so I know it's here and
it's heavy isn't a temperature is a cold
or is it hot or is it warm or cool let's
say for me it's cool to have a cold
heavy feeling right here and what about
texture doesn't have is not a soft
texture smooth texture or a rough and
kind of I one time I had a texture of
fear that being like a rusting rusting
metal so what is the texture of it and
for some of you there might have the
detection
what is the movement like all feelings
have movements fear might feel like it
doesn't have movement and a lot of times
really negative feelings feel that way
because they're really tense feelings
and so there is move
it's just hard to find the movement lot
of times it's are vibrating feeling that
vibrates just slightly a lot of times
are flowing very good feelings they move
up and out our circular so let's say for
me the fear is kind of like a harsh sort
of grinding vibrating feeling and this
is what I want to play with so if this
is the feeling of fear for me what
happens when I started playing with that
and turning it to its opposite so if the
feeling is your rough grinding feeling
that's kind of movement to what happens
when I slow that feeling down and make
it less grinding and make it smooth and
make it fluid and say is this feeling is
cool
what if i turn it into something that
was more warm and if its heavy but if I
turn it to more light and maybe I'm i
might even change the position i'm going
to push the feeling in my chest and now
instead of fear I feel a warm sensation
in my chest it has a very fluid movement
to it and maybe it's nice and soft and
smooth
that's very different fear in fact I
think there's a lot more warm it feels
like I more open to the situation and
I'm not afraid and it gives me space so
now once once you've played with those
some modalities and the kinesthetic
modality and you've got a sense of space
from the fear and you're not feeling the
fear as much bring that image backup or
bring that sound back and sometimes is
automatically changes when you see the
movie now you might see it differently
now I was associated into my movie so I
want to disassociate which will make
this even easier to deal with if you're
thinking about fearful situation a lot
of times were very associated into that
disassociate out of it and see it as if
you're watching a movie of yourself in
this situation and now that I don't feel
that fear like I did before I get a lot
more space and disassociated now going
to run this movie exactly how I want
things to go not how they have gone in
the past but hard like them to go in the
future and I'm going to re-edit this
movie until it looks exactly what i
wanted to look like and combining it
with this nice new feeling that is not
fear is like the opposite of fear
so once i have the movie that I like the
feelings that I like going with it i'm
going to check out with myself again and
ask myself is any part of me that resist
going forward with this new movie this
new way of doing things and this new
feeling with the way that I'm going to
act and respond in this new situation
without fear now there's a part of you
that does resisted you want to get in
touch with that part of you find out
what it's positive intent is for you and
reintegrated into the situation so you
might say well i still feel a sense of
fear
that's fine in fact that's probably a
good thing you don't want to necessarily
get rid of fear like i mentioned before
the question to ask yourself is does the
fear stop me now disappear crippling
does the fear keep me from doing my job
to the best that I could do it if not
then the process worked now you want a
future phases you want to take that move
into the future when is the next time
this was going to happen if you have a
meeting coming up in a few days so see
that movie and a few days happening and
you having the feeling that you want to
have and seeing the movie of how you
would like to be in that situation then
do it maybe a month out from now and
then maybe a year from now we have this
process to try i'd love to hear your
results
feel free to send an email our message
me on Facebook are on YouTube right into
this video in the comments you want to
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