Did you know that they have tactics
to train you to comply?
They do and I'm going to tell you
what they are in this video.
Hey there, I'm Rebecca Zung
and I'm an attorney.
I'm also a narcissist negotiation expert.
And what I do is I actually teach you,
train you how to shift the dynamic
with narcissists so that you can no longer be trained
to comply with narcissists
because I don't want you living in fear anymore
of them. I don't want you living
in this toxic environment with them anymore.
I want you to be able to break free from them.
I want you to be able to live your life
because your soul knows that it's supposed to be free.
Your soul knows that it was supposed to be meant for more.
You were put on this planet to create.
You were put on this planet to become the biggest version
of yourself,
to align your personality with your soul to become
something amazing.
Not to be trained by a narcissist to comply.
What is that about? That is a person who is fearful.
That is a person who lives in a place of scarcity,
and not a person who lives in abundance.
I want you to live in a place of abundance.
By the way, if you haven't subscribed
to this channel yet, make sure you do that.
Subscribe. Hit that notification bell.
I upload brand new videos every day.
While I'm also an attorney and, you know,
a narcissist negotiation expert and
I've helped millions of people through this channel,
add thousands of people through my law practice
and I've been named one of the top 1% of attorneys in the country,
and all that good stuff, but also had to deal
with narcissists in my personal life.
That's why I'm on this mission
and this crusade to make sure that people
get the information that they need
because I don't want you to have to be trained to comply
with narcissists anymore.
Alright, so by the end of this video,
I'm going to give you 10 tactics
that narcissists used to get people to comply.
So one of the ways that they do is they start off by
they become like you,
they want you to think they're just like you.
All right. So they even talk like you.
They look like you. They even dress like you
sometimes super weird.
So that's number one. They actually study
and they try to be just like you.
“Oh my God, you must be like my soulmate”
Whether it's a business or your neighbor or whatever,
they make it seem like you're just like a
long-lost soul mates.
So that's number one. They train you to comply
by steaming at the beginning,
like you were meant for each other.
That's number one. Number two.
The next thing they do is this
and there's actually a study done by this psychologist
named Robert Sapolsky,
and he did this study on monkeys.
where if these monkeys got a reward every single time,
the monkeys didn't even really care.
But if they got a reward intermittently,
just the anticipation that they were going to get a reward
cause the dopamine level in their brain to rise
to the level of cocaine
like they were so excited about maybe
they were going to get a reward
and the fact that narcissist like they go
from hot, super hot love bomb
to immediately cold.
Ghosting.
Who are you? What are you doing to?
to oh my God, love bomb
future fake, you know,
we'll be together then — cold again.
That intermittent reinforcement,
that is a way to train you to comply.
All right, hot and cold. Number two.
Number three,
They start isolating you from the people who love you.
I'm the one that loves you the most.
I'm the one that gives you the most.
Nobody else cares about you like I do.
Isolating you from your family and friends.
Number four way narcissists use to train you to comply is
Covert narcissist. They love this.
I-I’ve seen this myself personally unfortunately.
Passive aggression.
You know, they say they're going to do something
then they don't do it.
“You've lost so much weight.”
“I mean, you look pretty good for a big girl.”
Very passive-aggressive. So that's number four.
The number five way tactic that narcissists used
to train you to comply
You know, little ways of micromanipulating you—
getting you to do things that you don't want to do.
Forcing you to, you know, you didn't really mean that
DMing you little things in your DM box.
Oh, I didn't really mean for you to see that.
Dropping little drama bombs.
“Oh, I don't know I'm going to be able to make it.
My doctor wasn't sure.”
“Oh, I didn't mean for you to see that.”
“Well, I know you don't really care”
you know, little micro manipulations,
little little things like that.
That's another tactic that narcississts used to
train you to comply.
All narcissists love the
gas lighting.
“You’re so oversensitive.”
“You're misrepresenting the facts”
“You are misremembering.”
“We talked about that, don't you remember?”
And I have a whole video on
you definitely check that one out.
They all love the gaslighting.
which is a form of gaslighting
but I definitely wanted to highlight it because
it is so— so egregious.
When you add, like “huh” to the end of a sentence
that is super hurtful,
it doesn't make it funny and I’ve so seen this
in so many narcissists that I really wanted to just
specifically highlight it because they definitely use this
to train you to comply.
It is definitely a tactic that they use
and it's just not good.
It's not funny and it is something that
they use to train you to comply.
And if you don't think it's funny, I want you to
put that in the comments. “It's not funny!”
“Well, I guess I'll just stay here by myself
while you go off for the holidays,
and I'll just be over here alone.”
a covert love to play the victim.
“It’s not fair, it's not fair.
It's not fair that you get this and I don't “
or “I'm so sick.
There were things never go my way.
Life is terrible to me.” We all have our lessons in life.
We should not be playing the victim.
Narcissist loved to play the victim.
They love to use the flying monkeys
because then you feel bullied,
Their armies of people lined up so that
you feel like everybody's ganging up on you.
Here's the thing that was like, kind of like the
“aha” moment for me—
the flying monkeys don't always know that
they're being like recruited sometimes.
Like a lot of times the flying monkeys are kind of
being loved bombed by the narcissist too
They're not like in on it a lot of times.
So you kind of like can’t always like
even blame them.
Sometimes it is what it is.
You just got to like get away from the whole toxic thing,
like sage yourself. Sage everything
about you and just get away from the whole thing
and make sure that you grab my free
Crush My Negotiation Prep Worksheet if you haven't
done that yet,
winmynegotiation.com Subscribe to this channel,
subscribe and hit t hat notification bell
and join my free private Facebook group,
Narcissists Negotiators with Rebecca Zung
and make sure that,
you know, you're not doing this alone because you don't have to
and keep your mind strong
as you can do this. You can slay,
you can slay all day every day.
You can. I promise.
And don't let them get the best of you.
Alright, right. I'm Rebecca Zung
and I will definitely see you guys in the next video.