- How do you make friends not like a dork?
- Let's talk about that.
(upbeat music)
Good Mythical Morning!
- Mythical Beasts, you ask questions,
and when you ask those questions, you want answers.
It's kinda like a Facebook friend request
and we're Facebook.
You're browsing around,
ignoring the incessant pictures of that ugly baby
the girl you sat behind freshman year just had,
when all of a sudden you spy Matthias,
your old best friend who disappeared
the day after graduation.
Eager to see what he's been up to with his life,
you send him a friend request,
but weeks go by with no response.
But it's obvious he's on Facebook
because he's updated his profile picture twice!
So you finally give up any hope of connecting with Matthias
when out of the blue you get a ding on your phone.
Matthias has accepted your friend request.
If it wasn't for Facebook you'd never know he's been in jail
for the past 10 years after being caught
ripping the do not remove label ofF a mattress,
and he's really into Farmville.
And if it wasn't for us, you wouldn't have the answers
to your friend advice questions.
- Wow, that first friend advice question
comes from Matt Trovato, who asks,
"Can someone have too many friends?"
- Mm, Matt.
Having friends is a good thing, but having too many friends,
it's just unmanageable.
- Mm-hmm.
- So what we've done is we have determined
that there is an exact number of friends
that you should have.
And that number is six.
- Right.
- No more, no less.
And then with those six friends,
each one has to have a very specific specialization,
just like the A-Team, and we are gonna present
what those six specialized friends should be right now.
- Of course, you gotta have a best friend, right?
That go-to friend.
That person you've known forever.
That person who knows the real you.
Like for me I mean, I've got Martin Hanover.
You know, we've known each other for so long
that we finish each other's,
Martin would've said sentences.
- Martin Hanover.
Like I wouldn't know Martin Hanover.
- Oh, he's a good friend.
- All right, the second- - He's my best friend.
- The second friend you need to have is a tech friend.
You gotta have a person who you can call
when you need to sync the so-and-what to the which-in-outs
but you gotta run it through the calendar
before people can share it but they can't edit it.
- Right.
- Listen, I recently set up an Xbox at my home,
and I nearly killed multiple members of my family
in the process because it was so frustrating.
I have an open position.
I have a slot for a friend right there.
I'm taking applications.
- Okay.
Well, I could be that for you.
- Yeah, I'll relegate you to the tech friend.
- You gotta have a rich friend.
Now, I'm not necessarily talking super rich.
I'm talking like their parents have a jacuzzi
and a pool table.
- Jacuzzi-rich. - Kinda situation.
Or possibly even lake-house-with-jet-skis-rich.
- Lake-house-with-jet-skis-rich?
- Stuff that you can enjoy.
This is the kinda friend that when you go out to eat
at a restaurant, the bill comes and you take a little trip
to the bathroom so when you come back you just hope
everything's been taken care of.
A rich friend.
- A rich friend, but a jacuzzi-rich friend.
- Yeah.
- All right, your fourth friend you need
is a friend that works at somewhere cool.
Like they work on the set of "American Ninja Warrior".
'Cause I wanna run that course,
or at least like the first part of it with nobody watching.
- Yeah, access.
- In the dark.
All alone with just my friend, I guess.
'Cause he would let me in. - Yeah, yeah, right.
- And then it might be-- - But you can't
turn the lights on.
- Might be awkward. - 'Cause then they'll know
that you're there. - Me and him
running the ninja course, I don't know.
Or an EMT.
That also works here 'cause they got gruesome pictures
and really great stories.
In college, Jared was that friend for us
because he worked at the Baskin-Robbins,
so the samples were cone-sized!
- Yes, they were.
Okay you also need a friend with a faulty moral compass.
Let me explain.
This is somebody that you just kind of mentioned something
to them and then something
that's morally questionable happens that benefits you.
So like you're saying like, oh my neighbor's tree
is just so big and it's getting all kinds of leaves
in my yard.
He kind of like gives you a little wink
and the next day.
No tree. - No tree.
- Or you say I could really use an exotic pet
gives you a little wink next day you got like a Bengal tiger
on your back deck.
- A what?
- Bengal tiger on your back deck.
- And last but not least your sixth friend.
Of course your friend with the truck.
Next question.
Austin Holden asks, how do you make new friends
without scaring them off because you're extremely nerdy?
- Well, a nerd is basically a dork, right?
- Yeah basically.
- Okay right.
So we do have something that can help with this
because some of our favorite professional wrestlers
as part of their, not like a dork series,
I think they address this exact subject.
- They do.
- And we have that VHS tape. - You have the tape?
- Yeah. - We should put in
and then let everyone watch it.
- Yes.
- Ooh! - I'm Randy.
- And I'm Dandy.
- [Rhett And Link] We're the Mandy brothers.
Randy and Dandy Mandy.
- And we're here to tell you how to make friends
not like a dork.
First you gotta stop looking like a dork.
Nobody wants to be seen with somebody
that looks like the love child
of Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates.
Hoodies are out, Zuckergates.
You gonna take it off.
Get rid of it, zipper.
And get rid of those glasses.
Who cares if you can't see,
at least you won't be watching Star Track.
- It's "Star Trek".
- That's not even a word.
(grunting)
- Fashion is the outside of your body.
Look to the inside of your body.
Know that it's not filled with dOrk juice.
- Yes see what we wear.
Spandex will forever be not dorky.
- If you wanna make friends, you gotta talk to 'em
not like a dork.
- Minecraft, more like mind crap.
If I wanted to play with little blocks,
I'd go to a preschool full of tiny infant dorks.
- Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee, forget Mordor
you need to take a hike back through Rohan
to the forest Lord Florian and make out with Galadriel.
- Wait, have you been watching the Hobblet?
- Well, I was taking a nap and I woke up
and the TV was on and it was on
and it was just so compelling.
Hey, look at this.
What even is this thing?
I don't know.
(crashing)
- And finally, when you're trying to make new friends
you gotta not try to make new friends.
- Yeah that's right, nobody like a try hard.
So when you try hard, you gotta seem like you're not trying
'cause you don't want them to think you're trying
but you still gotta try.
- Hey wanna be friends?
- You're trying too hard, dork.
(screaming)
But seriously friends and friendship are very important.
- Aristotle once said, "In poverty
and other misfortunes of life, true friends
are as sure refuge.
They keep the young out of mischief.
They comfort and aid the old in their weakness
and they incite those in the prime of life to noble deeds."
- Your neck's gonna smell funny.
- I don't mind, you're a friend.
- You might be a dork
but you don't gotta make friends like one.
- I'm Randy.
- And I'm Dandy.
- [Rhett And Link] We're Randy and Dandy Mandy.
Peace.
- You know what those guys are not dorks.
- No, they are not.
- Whenever I watch that tape and I watch it often,
I always think to myself, not dorks.
- Next question from Ivana de la Cruz
who asks, "Well you showed us how to bro breakup
but how can I girl breakup?"
- That's right you guys probably remember
the bro breakup service that we launched a while back.
- So your bro Brandon called
and said he didn't wanna be a bro anymore, bro
- Bro?
Well now we're happy to announce the girl breakup service.
(upbeat music)
(bell ringing)
Hello?
- Hey girl.
- This is Gertrude from the girl breakup service.
- Girl.
So like I've got some news for you Gwen.
- Okay girl.
- So your girl, Grenda.
She like doesn't feel great
about you guys being girls anymore.
- Girl?
- Yeah, girl
- Girl, Grenda doesn't wanna be my girl?
- No girl.
- Well, I thought everything was great
because we would always go grocery shopping together.
- Yeah she told me about the grocery shopping girl.
But Grenda said that she was talking with Gabby
and Gail told Gabby that Grace wears a girdle girl.
Girl.
Everybody knows Grace wears a girdle.
What that's gotta do with me?
- Well girl, she like said that she got the girdle
from Gloria and Gloria said she got the girdle
from you girl.
- No, she did not get the girdle from me,
I don't even have a girdle.
- Girl this gossip is garbage.
- Gretchen, was that Gretchen?
- No that was Grenda, your friend.
- Oh girl, Grenda? - Girl.
That's part of the service is we leave 'em on
so they can listen, girl.
- That's not even--
- This call is being recorded, girl.
Well, what are we gonna do now girl?
- Go grocery shopping?
- Okay girl.
- Bye girl.
(upbeat music)
I'm told that's a very useful service.
- Indeed.
- For some people.
- Next question comes from Max Weisenberg
who asks, "How to friends if me is weird?"
- Just yourself be if weird is you.
- You make change to you, friends shouldn't.
- Think about worry what people other don't.
- Friend you accept for you who are true are.
- Hmm.
Now it's time for The Mythical Games.
(inspiring music)
As you know, we've been going head to head
in some pretty crazy games the past couple of weeks
to celebrate 75 years of M with our friends at M&M's.
- And things have been heating up.
You've won one, I've won one.
Today's game is called Magnified Maze Maneuvering.
First things first we apply
our magnificent magnifying glasses.
- And these are literally magnifying glasses.
- Yes.
- Now this game consists of three phases.
Even though I currently see six fingers.
- Okay phase one, you get a point
for every hurdle that you clear without knocking it over.
- And then we proceed to the balance beams.
Every time we fall off, a point is deducted.
You gotta get back onto that spot
and continue to move.
- And then phase three, you get a point
for every ball that you get into the monkey's mouth.
Red for me, blue for Link.
Are you ready?
- Yes I'm ready.
- Go to your spot.
You know, I can see my hands really really clearly
when I put 'em right next to my face.
I don't know what kind of advantage that is.
- Well I can't see the proper start.
- Just step over the first one.
- Okay.
- [Stevie] Okay on your marks, get set, go.
- I don't think I can even fit in between.
Oh, oh look now.
Oops.
- I have a problem.
I think I knocked over two of them but I'm not 100% sure.
And there' one last one.
Okay alright.
- Oh dang it!
I thought I had it.
- [Rhett] I'm on the balance.
- [Link] Now listen, I can't do this.
- Hell yeah.
I can't do this without glasses.
- I'm like a bird man.
Oh yeah.
- I better show my book back.
- Yeah.
Oh.
Okay that doesn't count 'cause I was at end.
Okay pass the ball.
- [Rhett] You beam, man.
- [Link] Ball time, okay.
Oh okay I did it.
Oh two I did.
- What are you doing man?
- Bananas man.
Three.
Are you out of breath?
Oh yeah.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one, time.
- Okay I'm pretty sure I lost.
- [Stevie] Yep Link won.
- Woo.
- Congratulations Link.
You are the Mega Maze Medalist.
There's the Mega Maze Medal
- Oh it looks really nice.
The Mythical Games continues next week.
Thanks for liking, commenting and subscribing.
- You know what time it is.
- Hi, I'm Erica.
- And I'm Maya.
- [Erica And Maya] And we're from
St. John's Newfoundland Labrador, Canada.
And it's time to spin the wheel of physicality.
- Thanks to M&M's for sponsoring this episode,
you too can celebrate with M,
click the link in the description to join us
as we celebrate 75 years of M&M's.
- And click the I to click through to Good Mythical More
where we're gonna open your mail
including finding out what this is.
Oh, oh
- Clowns in prison.
Huh?
- What are you in for?
- Ha ha.
Ha ha ha ha.
Ha ha. - What are you in?
- Ha.
- You a nose talker?
- Morse code.
- Oh, Morse code.
- Let's get outta here is what I'm saying.
Look, let's blow this joint.
Don't make me say it out loud.
- Well you just did.
- Sorry.
I don't want to touch this.
- Come on let's do it. - Medical waste.
- Well, it has a post-it sign on.
It says I thought I should be clear
that there's nothing hazardous about it.
Just gross.
Come on Jen, touch it.