There's gonna be a portion of you guys
That are gonna watch this video and have no idea who I am. So some people right now
would take their time and introduce themselves.
But I- don't give a shit, you do not need to know what my name is. MAC.
So today we're gonna be reviewing the VMAS (Pronounced Vimas)
That's Russian for VMAs it took place on a day. That was a Sunday
That happened however long ago depends on whenever I upload this video. People went. They wore clothing.
Which is weird, why do people do that?
And today I'm gonna be reviewing their clothing choices
Because they were choices. I love comedy.
Apparently this last VMA had the lowest ratings for any VMA in the history of VMAs.(true)
Which is what happens when you decide to air your programming
at the same time as the season finale of Game of Thrones, what the hell is wrong with you? (i dont know either)
Y'all really think I'm gonna be watching this over Khaleesi kickin ass
Y'all really think people gonna skip out on the chance of watching Jon Snow make it snow on House Targaryen
CAUSE HE DID
Spoiler alert!
But anyways, here we go, Katy Perry wow
(a moment of silence)
Okay, I actually like this, but I don't like the fact that her boobs aren't
Equally being showcased. Like one is getting way more
Paparazzi lovin' than the other, y'all consider this a date? Also half cape, me too. That's my nickname. Why does her armpit look like it's tryna escape? (it wants to be FREE)
K, next. Demi Lovato. Oh my God. I love Genie. I mean those pants though
MCHammer is shaking and that fierce ass face tho why do you look you have no boobs? K, next.
Who the hell is this, and why?
How does she get those shoes? Cute. Okay, next. Hayley Steinfeld?
I don't know how old you are but she will always look 16 to me. Are you older than me?
Wow, I love fabric, especially when it's just placed in...
places, next! Heidi Klum is just there. What are you doin'? Other than showcasin' those...
boobies
(another moment of silence (but gay))
I'm gay. First of all, honey, what's happening here? What are you doing?
What're your aspirations in life, why does your crotch look like it's being covered by a plate? Love it!
Wow
Next, Lorde looks like a princess, feather duster, Dothraki, queen of the Nile honestly
I look at this dress and get mad because the first I think of is those pillows.
You know those pillows that look, like, really cute.(yep)
That're like made of the same material (mhm)
But then when you take them home, they ain't so cute anymore. All of a sudden fuzzies all over your fucking house (its raining fuzzies)
and you don't know what the hell to do with it?
You wake up in the morning your hair is purple, not because you dyed it, but because of that stupid-ass pillow
That is what this dress reminds me of, Next! Kesha
(another moment of silence)
Is your dress in a rush? Why is- why does- why does everything feel like it's happening so fast ?
Also, love the shoulder cape. 'Cuz there's no other reason why they are there but to help your shoulders fly.(it wants to be FREE)
Next! This person...
Looks like someone I used to work with and I got nervous
Who are you? A teen mom 2 star, why are you there, do you do music?
Is it bad that my eyes go directly to the background when I look at this picture?
That was shady, that was shady. Next! Paris Jackson
Wow
I love art. It looks like she lowkey came in her bikini, but then somebody at the door was like,
'You need to be wearing like some more clothes' so she was like, 'okay'
So she went to the 99-cent store, bought a clear tablecloth, and some markers,
and had some fun, had a Saturday night, Honey.
This is Christian dior. You know designers can really get away with anything nowadays , next!
Oh my God, Vanessa hudgens your skirt fell. She looks like Big Bird's little sister, Red Pigeon(new addition to the bird family)
I like the fact that we're seeing your knees, but we don't have to, but we are anyway (the knee wants to be FREE
We didn't have to see them, but, they're there and we're looking. It's a choice
that was made and we just have to consume it. Next.
Who is this (i honestly do not know) and
And why does she look like she's gonna take my firstborn child?
Oh, this is Amber Rose! She got hair now?!
Wait a minute! Wait! Since when? (i dont know?)
I don't believe. I have never seen Amber Rose with hair in my entire life, and I am honestly...
(moment of silence for amber's bald head)
Uncomfortable, I mean she looks great
But, next, who are you and why do you look like every surfer boy that went to my school? What is happening?
It is a yellow suit with a bunch of
McDonald's logos, counting the McChicken sandwich honestly if the promo is real honestly if I was getting paid
Bitch, I would. I would be wearing a jacket that says Arby's. I don't give a shit. If I'm getting money
I'm getting money, next! Millie Brown looks like a spider. Why do you look like a spider?
Like, low-key all the dots took like spider eggs. I'm getting very itchy right now. You're great. Love you
Can't wait for Stranger Things season 2! And if you want to sponsor me to say that more proficiently
Netflix; email me, you can just follow me on Twitter @Machaizelli,
and just, you know. We can get in contact through there. Love it, as much as I possibly can. Next
Wow. I love how far men's fashion has gone over the years, Olivia Mun. Girl, yes. Go ahead. Just do it! Just do it bitch, just go.
Just have it, take it all. Live it, grab it, and just run with it. Go everywhere with it. Touch it, whip it around, rub it, lick it,
Slice it up, give it to people, take it back, eat it some more, lick it again, spit it out,
Hand it out to people, and then put on your body. Girl, is that pixie shitting green? Okay, wait no. That's... okay.
Okay, I got confused for a second. Khalid. I swear to God that's H&M, honey.
I swear to God I've seen that on the rack. Me too if I went to the VMAs. Honestly, I'm not about to pay for no expensive outfit ( im also broke so...)
Either they givin' me one or I'm going straight to Target, you can't stop me.
Tyler Posey.
You know what, men? You have inspired me to go to one of these events wearing some weird-ass
Alexander McQueen dress just to show y'all what men CAN do.
Nicki Minaj.
Damn. Girl. Fuck. Come on bubblegum. Come through pussy pink. I'm all about it.
But if I wore this it would not... it just would not
Farrah Abraham: You. Look. Terrifying. Honestly, I don't even wanna look at this picture anymore. (im scared)
What is your face doing? What are its aspirations?
What is it trying to say? Honestly, girl. Next please. We're just gonna move on. Oh my God the picture got bigger
Can't escape it and the webpage just closed on me great. I didn't need to do this video anyway
No wait. Wait, I gotta get to Fifth Harmony. I gotta get to Fifth Harmony. I gotta get those views.
Fifth Harmony! Oh wait no, Fourth Harmony!
How many times you heard that stupid ass joke?
Girl yes, girl yes, yes girl. I don't know about that one though honestly.(same)
Come through Red Condor. Come through Black Raven. Come through White Dove. Come through...[pause] *sigh* you.
K I'm done. Kendrick Lamar.
(another moment of silence for mens fashion)
Yep.
Okay, we're done. That was it! That was the VMA Fashion of 2017
And hopefully it stays in 2017 and we improve on this moment. What have you learned today kids?
Men really need to step their game up. I swear to God, these straights.
What do you think of the fashion of the VMAs, what do you think of the VMAs?
But anyways I'm gonna go drink lots of water and pray that that makes me lose ten pounds
My name's Mac, and don't forget to like comment share and subscrib-ey
BWAH!
[Outro music]