>> Announcer: IN THE YEAR 2018, ALIENS LANDED ON EARTH.
THEY DID NOT COME IN PEACE. >> MEN, WOMEN, THE HOUR IS UPON
US. THE ALIENS ARE STRONGER THAN WE
THOUGHT WHICH MEANS THE FIGHT FOR HUMANITY BEGINS NOW.
WE MAY BE DOWN BUT WE ARE NOT OUT.
WE'VE LOST LIMBS. WE'VE LOST LIVES.
BUT WE WILL NOT LOSE THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.
NOW LET'S GET OUT THERE, DESTROY THOSE ALIENS AND SAVE THE HUMAN
RACE. BUT FIRST, YOUR COMMANDER IN
CHIEF WANTS TO SAY A WORD. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> HELLO. YES.
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY. WHO HERE LOVES TRUMP?
I KNOW THIS GUY LOVES TRUMP OVER HERE.
HE LOVES TRUMP. NOW HERE'S THE DEAL.
WE ARE GOING TO BEAT THESE ALIENS BECAUSE WE HAVE GOT THE
BEST MILITARY, BUT WE DON'T WIN ANYMORE.
AND THE ALIENS ARE LAUGHING AT US.
THEY'RE KILLING US AND THEY'RE LAUGHING AT US.
>> WE KNOW THE ALIENS ARE KILLING US, SIR.
THEY HAVE THE MOST ADVANCED WEAPONIZED TECHNOLOGY WE HAVE
EVER SEEN. >> HERE'S WHAT WE ARE GOING TO
DO. WE ARE GOING TO BRING COAL BACK.
OKAY? WE'RE GOING TO HAVE SO MUCH COAL
YOU'RE GOING TO SAY, WHERE DID ALL THIS COAL COME FROM?
I NEVER KNEW THERE COULD BE SO MUCH COAL.
>> WHAT ABOUT THE ALIENS? THEY VAPORIZED THE ENTIRE STATE
OF CALIFORNIA. >> SO THEN I WON THE POPULAR
VOTE? >> SIR, PLEASE.
EVERYONE IN CALIFORNIA IS DEAD. >> EVEN ARNOLD?
SIR, YES. WE ARE DEALING WITH A HIGHLY
ADVANCED SPECIES. THEY ARE FROM ZORBLAT-9.
THEIR SHIPS ARE INVISIBLE. THEY'RE TELEPATHIC.
>> OKAY. WE DON'T KNOW THAT THEY ARE FROM
ZORBLAT-9. I'VE ACTUALLY HEARD ZORBLAT-9 IS
VERY BEAUTIFUL, VERY FANTASTIC. >> OH, MY GOD.
DOES HE HAVE BUSINESS TIES ON ZORBLAT-9?
[ EXPLOSION ] >> GENERAL, THE ALIENS ARE
OUTSIDE THE BASE. >> MR. PRESIDENT, PLEASE.
WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING. LOOK HOW MUCH THE ALIENS
CONTROL. THIS IS THE ALIENS AND THIS IS
US. >> THIS IS US?
>> YES. >> THAT IS A GREAT SHOW, "THIS
IS US." I CAN'T WATCH IT BECAUSE IT'S ON
NBC AND NBC HAS BEEN VERY UNFAIR TO ME.
>> SIR, I HAVE TERRIBLE NEWS. TRUMP HOTEL HAS BEEN DESTROYED
CAUSING $15 MILLION IN DAMAGES. >> MORE LIKE A BILLION DOLLARS.
>> LUCKILY NO LIVES WERE LOST BECAUSE NO ONE WAS STAYING AT
THE HOTEL. >> THAT'S NOT TRUE.
THAT'S NOT TRUE. EVERYONE LOVES TO STAY AT MY
HOTEL. I'M SURE A BUNCH OF TOP SHELF
CLASSY PEOPLE DIED THERE. [ EXPLOSIONS ]
>> THE ALIENS! THEY'RE COMING!
>> I ACTUALLY HEARD THE ALIENS ARE ALREADY HERE.
THEY HAVE BEEN HIDING IN THIS COUNTRY FOR HUNDREDS OF YEARS.
IT'S A FANTASTIC. THEY'RE SHAPESHIFTERS.
THEY LOOK LIKE REGULAR PEOPLE, BUT THEY'RE ALIENS.
LOOK, THERE'S ONE RIGHT THERE. >> WHAT?
I AM NOT AN ALIEN. >> YES, SHE IS.
SO IS THE WOMAN NEXT TO HER RIGHT THERE.
>> OH, OKAY. NO.
>> SIR, WHERE ARE YOU GETTING THIS INFORMATION?
>> FROM A VERY REPUTABLE SOURCE? >> THE FBI, CIA?
>> INFO WARS, A RADIO SHOW HOSTED BY ALEX JONES.
YOU KNOW HE'S LEGIT. HE'S ALWAYS TAKING OFF HIS
SHIRT. I HAIR-BY DEMAND -- I HERE BE
BEDAMNED -- I'M SORRY -- I GIGI HADID THAT WE LAUNCH A FULL
INVESTIGATION INTO THESE TWO ALIENS RIGHT NOW.
>> THEY'RE INSIDE THE BASE. >> ALL RIGHT, TROOPS, THE TIME
HAS COME TO FIGHT AS BROTHERS AND SISTERS AND AMERICANS.
NOW JOIN ME IN THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE.
>> I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG OF THE UNITED STATES OF
AMERICA AND TO THE REPUBLIC FOR WHICH IT STANDS.
>> ONE NACHO ♪ ♪ ONE NATION UNDER GOD
INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL.
>> HUMANS! RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.
TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER. >> IT'S HIM.
HE'S THE PRESIDENT. >> NO, I'M NOT.
YOU ARE. >> REALLY?
THIS IS GOING TO BE SO EASY! AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
"SATURDAY NIGHT!"